1718 || generational shame || book club

1718 || generational shame || book club

We can't heal what we don't feel.


Unfortunately, one of the greatest powers of toxic shame is that it creates automatic, unconscious defenses: like Idealization, repression, denial, dissociation.


So most people don't heal this shame and end up passing it down to their children, through hierarchal power structures, coercion, and denial.


Dysfunctional Family Rules: Chaos or Control, Perfectionism or Anomie, Blame self or others, Denial of freedoms,


John Bradshaw's website.

Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You

Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.


Read Julie's Medium Blog.

Support JULIE (and the show!)

Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.


Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com

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The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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Jaksot(1798)

1727 || common thought distortions

1727 || common thought distortions

common cognitive distortions among shame-based people include: catastrophizing, mind-reading, all-or-nothing or either-or thinking, personalization, blaming, global blaming, filtering, cognitive bias ...

1 Huhti 11min

1726 || grief work || healing the shame that binds you

1726 || grief work || healing the shame that binds you

Grief work: identify, build awareness, re-route with corrective responses. John Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, Healing the Shame that Binds You Read the TOXIC SHAME article from Very Well Mind.Read ...

31 Maalis 12min

1725 || set your own anchor + ride the wave

1725 || set your own anchor + ride the wave

Shame spirals tend to attach themselves to certain triggers or anchors we have created from our past experiences. If we are able to create safe, corrective anchors to attach to these triggers, we can ...

30 Maalis 11min

1724 || delayed grief || healing the shame that binds you

1724 || delayed grief || healing the shame that binds you

delayed grief is how we end up creating false selves. it's our job to grieve fully, so we can release the attachments to our denial. connectedness, validation, and support are the way through. John Br...

27 Maalis 10min

1723 || connection is the antidote || healing the shame that binds you

1723 || connection is the antidote || healing the shame that binds you

in order to be healed, we must come out of isolation. identity formation is a social process, so unraveling toxic shame is also a social process. - John BradshawJohn Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, ...

26 Maalis 10min

1722 || you gotta feel it to heal it || healing the shame that binds you

1722 || you gotta feel it to heal it || healing the shame that binds you

As long as our shame is hidden, there is nothing we can do about it. “The only way out is through.” "Embracing our shame involves pain. Pain is what we try to avoid. In fact, most of our neurotic beha...

25 Maalis 11min

1721 || when the emotion becomes addictive || healing the shame that binds you

1721 || when the emotion becomes addictive || healing the shame that binds you

"Being nice is primarily a way of manipulating people and situations." - John Bradshaw"Perfectionism flows from the core of toxic shame. A perfectionist has no sense of healthy shame; he has no intern...

24 Maalis 11min

1720 || our culture of shame || healing the shame that binds you

1720 || our culture of shame || healing the shame that binds you

Our culture does not handle emotions well. We like folks to be happy and fine. We learn rituals of acting happy and fine at an early age. I can remember many times telling people “I’m fine,” when I fe...

21 Maalis 11min

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