‘Modern Love’: Why Boys and Men Are Floundering, According to Therapist Terry Real
The Daily25 Touko

‘Modern Love’: Why Boys and Men Are Floundering, According to Therapist Terry Real

A session with Terry Real, a marriage and family therapist, can get uncomfortable. He’s known to mirror and amplify the emotions of his clients, sometimes cursing and nearly yelling, often in an attempt to get men in touch with the emotions they’re not used to honoring.

Real says men are often pushed to shut off their expression of vulnerability when they’re young as part of the process of becoming a man. That process, he says, can lead to myriad problems in their relationships. He sees it as his job to pull them back into vulnerability and intimacy, reconfiguring their understanding of masculinity in order to build more wholesome and connected families.

In this episode, Real explains why vulnerability is so essential to healthy masculinity and why his work with men feels more urgent than ever. He explains why he thinks our current models of masculinity are broken and what it will take to build new ones.

This episode was inspired by a New York Times Magazine piece, “How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me” by Daniel Oppenheimer.

For more Modern Love, search for the show wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Wednesday.

Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

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Friday, Feb. 24, 2017

Friday, Feb. 24, 2017

President Trump’s top deputies delivered a blunt message to the party faithful on Thursday: the Republicans are winning the fight — and it is a fight. Plus a conversation with the director of “Moonlight.” Guests: Jonathan Martin, who has covered the inside story of both political parties for years; Nikole Hannah-Jones, a staff writer for the New York Times Magazine. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2lLN9U9. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

24 Helmi 201720min

Thursday, Feb. 23, 2017

Thursday, Feb. 23, 2017

Rukmini Callimachi takes us into Iraq to see if a major victory over the Islamic State is really at hand in the streets of Mosul. Guests: Ms. Callimachi, a New York Times correspondent covering terrorism; Nathaniel Popper, a Times reporter covering finance and technology. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2lvdohI. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

23 Helmi 201720min

Wednesday, Feb. 22, 2017

Wednesday, Feb. 22, 2017

Are 11 million people suddenly facing deportation? What we know and don’t know about the Trump administration’s new plan for undocumented immigrants. Guests: Michael D. Shear, a White House reporter at The New York Times, and Caitlin Dickerson, a national reporter who writes about immigration; Sheriff Mark Napier of Pima County, Ariz. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2lc3H5e. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

22 Helmi 201720min

Tuesday, Feb. 21, 2017

Tuesday, Feb. 21, 2017

Who are the 500 private citizens with unprecedented access to President Trump on the weekends? And what is the “deep state”? Guests: Scott Shane, who has covered national security and the U.S. intelligence community for The Times for decades, and Nicholas Confessore and Maggie Haberman, who unmasked the secret list of Mar-a-Lago members. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2lEWRbt. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

21 Helmi 201720min

Friday, Feb. 17, 2017

Friday, Feb. 17, 2017

President Trump’s sprawling surprise news conference and the view from Russia. Guests: Jim Rutenberg, the media columnist for The New York Times; Neil MacFarquhar, The Times’s Moscow bureau chief. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2m6gM0O. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

17 Helmi 201718min

Thursday, Feb. 16, 2017

Thursday, Feb. 16, 2017

President Trump says peace in the Middle East does not require a two-state deal. What we know and what we don’t about the Trump campaign’s communication with Russia. And why did Republicans turn on Andrew Puzder? Guests: Mark Mazzetti; Alan Rappeport. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2m1BDRS. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

16 Helmi 201717min

Wednesday, Feb. 15, 2017

Wednesday, Feb. 15, 2017

From fateful call to resignation, the 47-day fall of President Trump’s national security adviser, Michael T. Flynn. We tell the whole story. Guest: Matthew Rosenberg, a national security reporter for The New York Times who has known Mr. Flynn for years. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2l7w8ls. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

15 Helmi 201717min

Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2017

Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2017

America and the Middle East in the Trump administration: deep, personal ties and an emerging plan for peace. Guests: Jodi Kantor, a reporter for The New York Times; Amanda Taub and Max Fisher, who write The Times’ Interpreter column. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2kFDqvC. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

14 Helmi 201720min

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