271: Ryan Holiday | Stillness Is the Key

Brian Grazer (@BrianGrazer) is an Academy Award-winning producer whose films and TV shows have been nominated for 45 Academy Awards and 196 Emmys. He is the author of Face to Face: The Art of Human Connection. What We Discuss with Brian Grazer: What imposter syndrome looks like when you're at the top of the Hollywood game. How Brian turned a childhood learning disability into a superpower. Why being called a loser by Harvey Weinstein at the 1996 Academy Awards doesn't Brian hurt so much these days. How Brian networked himself up from legal clerk at Warner Bros. to one of Hollywood's most respected producers. Why Brian values curiosity over IQ. And much more… Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/267 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! On No Dumb Questions, a science guy from the deep south (Destin of Smarter Every Day) and a humanities guy from the wild west (Matt Whitman of The Ten Minute Bible Hour) discuss deep questions with varying levels of maturity. Give No Dumb Questions a listen here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

22 Loka 201957min

Recently you stopped all contact with a childhood friend due to his toxic behavior. He went through a pretty bad breakup due to his behavior and you had enough. He thinks that by being a horrible dick to people, he's being really honest and helping them. Your other friends tell you that you should talk to him about why you cut him off, but you feel you've told him one too many times why he's a dick and what he could do to change. Do you owe him a conversation just because you were childhood friends? On this Feedback Friday, we'll try to help you decide whether to continue ghosting this ex-friend or actually take the time to tell him he's a horrible person. And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Jason DeFillippo (@jpdef) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in! Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/266. On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss: Interested in doing some prison time with Jordan next February? It's filling up fast; reach out to prison@jordanharbinger.com for details! Recently you stopped all contact with a childhood friend due to his toxic behavior. Do you owe him a conversation just because you were childhood friends -- even if it's just to tell him he's a horrible person? You've grown distant from your once-close sibling, who has become increasingly anxious and self-isolated to the point where family visits never happen anymore. Is there a way you can help draw them out? Your boyfriend enjoys porn, so you're wondering -- from a guy's perspective -- why is it necessary to have an “escape” from a relationship with a partner who is perfectly willing to do it all? Is he just scared to be vulnerable enough to ask you? After six potential relationships got nipped in the bud because the other person says you're "too good" for them, your suspicions are aroused. What's the most likely story, and what can you do to change this all-too-familiar outcome? When you work in politics and it's election season, how do you wrangle your campaign volunteers to do the work that's proven effective (phone calls and knocking on doors) instead of the work they want to do (strategy meetings and social media)? You're constantly told you need to meet with mentors, but you've gotten a lot of terrible advice from them. Is there any value to just going through the motions with bad mentors who may be great connections if not the soundest strategists? You're a shoe-in for a job opportunity opening near you soon, but it would mean pulling out of a job you're not that excited about that requires a lengthy commute. How can you let go of the latter job without leaving anyone in the lurch? Life Pro Tip: Feeling a gag reflex? Squeeze your fist really... See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

18 Loka 201948min

Moran Cerf (@twtrdtcm) is a neuroscientist who strives to understand the underlying mechanisms of human psychology, behavior changes, emotion, decision making, and dreams. What We Discuss with Moran Cerf: What would a future in which we could connect our brains to the cloud and outsource parts of our thinking look like? Can we — or will we ever be able to — record and share our dreams like home movies of the most intimate kind? How teachers might use virtual reality attuned to our specific brain engagement patterns to ensure we're learning at an optimal rate. What happens when computers and machines can read our thoughts and know what we're thinking even before we do? What are the security risks of having our thoughts available to these kinds of networks? And much more… Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/265 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! Join entrepreneur, technology investor, and self-experimenter Kevin Rose as he explores new ways to reach peak personal and professional performance on The Kevin Rose Show — listen here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

17 Loka 20191h 4min

Mike Rowe (@mikeroweworks) is a host and narrator known for his work on Dirty Jobs, Somebody's Gotta Do It, The Way I Heard It Podcast, and Returning the Favor. He is also now an author, and his first book, The Way I Heard It, is out now. What We Discuss with Mike Rowe: The kind of cognitive dissonance Mike believes our country needs right now, and the tropes we could afford to grasp more loosely. How the prevailing desire among correction culture commandos to prove others wrong on the Internet stifles our ability to exchange ideas freely. Why Mike eschews second takes in favor of presenting his audience with the authentic moments they trust him to share. How Mike's thrifty (and crafty) parents suckered him into feeling sorry for rich people when he was growing up. Why we shouldn't view a blue collar career pursuit as a cautionary tale in comparison to the lifelong debt likely incurred by chasing a four-year degree these days. And much more… Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/264 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! On No Dumb Questions, a science guy from the deep south (Destin of Smarter Every Day) and a humanities guy from the wild west (Matt Whitman of The Ten Minute Bible Hour) discuss deep questions with varying levels of maturity. Give No Dumb Questions a listen here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

15 Loka 20191h 12min

You recently had a revelation that your spouse has zero respect for you. On a daily basis, you're reminded how to do basic tasks and criticized for every minor mistake you make. You've also noticed that they never value your advice, and if they have a question about something — no matter how confident your answer is — they'll always ask someone else afterward as if they don't value or believe your answer. You work hard, have a good job that supports your family on your income alone, you help out around the house probably more than most in your position, and you're going to school to further your education and job opportunities even more. The big question is: If they really do have zero respect for you, how can you win back your spouse's respect? We'll try to answer this and much more on the latest Feedback Friday! And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Jason DeFillippo (@jpdef) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in! Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/263. On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss: Interested in doing some prison time with Jordan next February? It's filling up fast; reach out to prison@jordanharbinger.com for details! From the way you're treated in public and private, you recently had a revelation that your spouse of several years has zero respect for you. Even if you can figure out why, can respect ever be regained after it's lost? If so, how? You're trying to get through college as an introvert, but your challenges are going as expected. Once people have an impression of you as an unfriendly person fixed in their minds, is it possible to change it? You're trying to move into another role at your current company; you had a great interview and thought it was a sure thing. But they chose someone else and you wonder what went wrong. What can you do to improve your chances next time? Your significant other isn't pulling their weight financially. How can you tactfully approach the matter without making them feel completely worthless, and what can you do to ensure they understand the concept of “adulting?” You're from a developing nation and, thanks to the Internet, you relate more to Western culture than the one in which you were raised. Unfortunately, any potential significant other isn't on board with your “radical” views. Should you seek love in another land even though you don't have a lot of money to travel? You're young, and so are most of your network connections. Should you still work on this younger network, or should you try to build an older network while maintaining the one you currently have? Life Pro Tip: Want to connect with others by sharing your information without relying on tired old business cards? Print a QR code... See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

11 Loka 201943min

T.I. (@Tip) is an award-winning rapper, actor, entrepreneur, family man, philanthropist, author, activist, and host of expediTIously on PodcastOne. What We Discuss with T.I.: Why T.I. went from selling candy to selling crack as a teenager, and how he turned away from a life of crime to pursue a life of rhyme. How does an award-winning rapper, actor, entrepreneur, family man, philanthropist, author, activist, and podcast host celebrate a landmark birthday? T.I.'s world-tested secrets to releasing an album and filming an unauthorized music video while serving time in prison. How T.I. walks the line between excess and moderation when it comes to everything from music to jewelry to tequila. Does T.I. feel tension between setting a good example for kids and community, and staying on top of the rap game? And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/262 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Join entrepreneur, technology investor, and self-experimenter Kevin Rose as he explores new ways to reach peak personal and professional performance on The Kevin Rose Show -- listen here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

10 Loka 201951min

Mubin Shaikh (@MrMubinShaikh) is a former Islamic extremist who became an undercover counter-terrorism operative instrumental in exposing a plot to hold Canada's Parliament hostage and behead the Prime Minister. He is the co-author of Undercover Jihadi: Inside the Toronto 18 -- Al Qaeda Inspired, Homegrown Terrorism in the West. What We Discuss with Mubin Shaikh: What does "radicalization" mean to someone who's experienced it firsthand, and how can it convert a teenaged Canadian metalhead into a true believer of a cause that uses terrorism to accomplish its goals? What did it take for this true believer to change course and start working for his government's counter-terrorist agency? The differences between Sufi and Wahhabi Islam, and what makes the latter a more suitable creed for extremists. Why "terrorism is the atom bomb of the poor man." How Mubin's undercover work exposed a massive terrorist plot, and what the aftermath of this operation looked like. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://jordanharbinger.com/261 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

8 Loka 20191h 11min

You're in your 30s, single, and you have a problem with prostitutes. You don't even really enjoy the experience and you know it's not worth your time, money, or the legal or health risks, but you still have an irresistible compulsion to continue meeting with them. Even more troubling is that you've noticed it's slowly changing how you see money and women. You know you'd like to settle down with the right woman some day, but you worry that the temptation to cheat on her with a prostitute could ruin everything. It's out of control. So what can you do? On this Feedback Friday, we'll try to help you figure out how to quit your prostitute problem (and determine why you have one in the first place). And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Jason DeFillippo (@jpdef) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in! On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss: Interested in doing some prison time with Jordan next February? It's filling up fast; reach out to prison@jordanharbinger.com for details! Your proclivity for prostitutes is a problem. Perhaps there's a process to properly put this pricey, precarious, and pointless pursuit out to pasture? As a first time juror, how do you balance your desire for justice with impartiality in a difficult-to-prove case? [Thanks to Corbin Payne, Esq. for helping with this one!] When everyone has to work harder to make up for the boss' brother (who pulls full salary but only shows up half the time), can company culture be called to task, or is it just time to move on? You wound up on Hertz's do not rent list as the result of a fraudster stealing cars under your identity. The company refuses to take you off the list in spite of proof you weren't at fault. Is there any recourse for you? You believe you have solid ideas, but no capital or time to develop and market them. Is it possible to sell these ideas to someone with these resources without getting taken advantage of? You've just turned 18, but feel directionless. While you don't want to live a "normal" life that's been played out millions of times, becoming a therapist or trying your hand at standup comedy have crossed your mind. What's our advice? If you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with, what happens when you can't relate to anyone in your immediate circle since moving to be closer to your spouse's family in another country and settling for a miserable, underpaying job? Your coworker would be more articulate (and effective at his job) if he could only eliminate that Beaky Buzzard-like "duhhhhh" he uses as conversation filler. How can you tactfully suggest ways for him to hone his presentation skills? Life Pro Tip: Set a nearby shop as your home address in your vehicle's navigation... See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

4 Loka 201957min