Bucking Societal Pressure and Deciding NOT to Adopt with Guest, Jess Tennant

“There’s so much out there about the people who are ‘successful’ at adopting, but there’s nothing about people who have walked away from the process.” — Jess Tennant, a woman who decided NOT to adopt, due, in part, to predatory adoption agency practices, in ep 31.

Jess, is an ally in unfiltering adoption. In 2017 after waiting to adopt for many years, Jess and her husband decided to halt their efforts. Some of the reasons are chilling, as you’ll hear in her story.

Jess is a beloved public school teacher in upstate NY, specializing in middle school special ed. She shares sentiments prospective adopters hear from adoption agencies that will make you squirm. She also shares observations about the culture of pronatalism and the ways it shows up pervasively for those wanting to adopt, and even more loudly for those who decide not to.

Engage Further

Resources:

• Jess is featured in Chapter 19 of Adoption Unfiltered
• Jess’s current blog: Finding a Different Path
• Jess’s infertility and adoption blog: My Path to Mommyhood
• Jess’s journey to openness
• Interview with Jess in Ep. 306 of Adoption: The Long View
• Sara’s Newsweek article (mentioned)
• Jess’s panel for World Childless Week: “Oops! I completely forgot I could just adopt! Thanks for reminding me.”
• Gateway Women’s Collective via Childless Collective
• Resources through World Childless Week
• The NotMom by Choice or by Chance

Sara Easterly:

• Sara’s Website
• Searching for Mom: A Memoir
• Adoptee-Voices.com
• @saraeasterlyauthor

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

• Twisted Sisterhood Podcast
• Love, Your Birth Mom
• @fromanothamotha

Lori Holden:

• Lori’s Website
• The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption
• Adoption: The Long View Podcast
• @lavluz