Ep69: Dr Miles Neale - Buddhas, Tulkus, & Narcissists

In this episode I’m joined by Dr Miles Neale Buddhist psychotherapist and author of Gradual Awakening. When Dr Neale contacted me to offering appear on the podcast, I was intrigued by his impressive list of mentors - including Columbia University’s Professor Robert Thurman and Geshe Tenzin Zopa. Miles recounts how an affluent but disturbed childhood with alcoholic parents and a narcissistic father drove him to self harm and dissatisfaction, and how he found solace and healing in religious practice and a series of influential mentors. Miles tells a remarkable story of a supernatural experience with a reincarnated child master, a ‘tulku’. Miles goes on to addresses the conflicts between the view of his Western therapeutic training, which prizes healthy parental attachment, and his religious affiliation with Tibetan Buddhism, in which specially chosen boys as young as three years old are removed from their homes to undergo rigorous training to become avatars of their lineage tradition. Miles discusses the cultural and religious context of this practice, and the possible developmental impacts on the young boys. Miles reveals the secrets to being a good mentee, discusses the ups and downs of his relationships with his own mentors, and candidly discusses his own path as a practicing Buddhist and professional therapist. … Video version: https://www.guruviking.com/ep69-dr-miles-neale-buddhas-tulkus-narcissists/ Audio version of this podcast also available on iTunes and Spotify – search ‘Guru Viking Podcast’. … Topics Include: 0:00 - Intro 1:24 - Miles’ childhood with alcoholic parents and a narcissistic father 7:32 - Consequences of being raised by addicts and a narcissist 22:51 - How Miles was able to received healthy reparenting from his mentors 29:01 - Miles discusses the developmental consequences of the tulku system in young boys 31:58 - Miles’ supernatural experience with a young tulku 35:16 - The cultural and religious context of removing young tulkus from the family home 44:59 - Does the cultural and religious context shield the child from developmental damage? 51:08 - Miles asks Steve why he asked about tulkus 54:17 - The role of mentorship and apprenticeship in human flourishing 59:00 - What makes Miles such a good mentee? 1:03:28 - Miles’ 20 year mentorship under Dr Joe Loizzo 1:11:33 - Miles’ schism with Joe Loizzo 1:15:21 - Why Miles’ and Joe’s relationship ruptured 1:18:36 - Miles’ peer relationship with Geshe Tenzin Zopa 1:21:57 - A sense of coronation at Miles’ book launch 1:26:20 - Miles’ relationship with Professor Robert Thurman 1:34:22 - Negative experiences with Geshe Michael Roach community … To find out more about Miles, visit: - https://www.milesneale.com/ … For more interviews, videos, and more visit: - http://www.guruviking.com Music ‘Deva Dasi’ by Steve James