Why Do We Want What We Want?

Why Do We Want What We Want?

Why do we want the things we want? While we'll offer up plenty of reasons to explain our choices, my guest today says the real reason we want what we want is this: other people in our lives want those same things.

His name is Luke Burgis and he's studied philosophy, theology, and classical literature, works as a business entrepreneur, investor, and educator, and is the author of Wanting: The Power of Mimetic Desire in Everyday Life. Luke and I discuss how our desires are strongly mimetic, that is, imitative, and how there are two groups of people that act as models of desire for us: celebrities and public figures who are distant from us, and friends, family, and colleagues who are close to us. Luke explains why it's actually that latter group where we experience the most rivalry and conflict, because the more similar we are, the more we end up competing for the same things, the more envy we experience, and the more we want to differentiate ourselves from the crowd, even though the areas in which to do so can be increasingly small. In fact, someone can be a model of desire, not only in influencing us to imitate them, but in motivating us to act in the opposite way. Luke shares how mimetic desire can be both a negative and destructive or a positive and productive force, and offers advice on how to harness it for the latter purpose by humbly recognizing the way other people are influencing our wants, and using that knowledge to opt out of games we don't want to play, utilize the healthy aspects of competition without allowing it to get us off track, and intentionally choose worthy, even transcendent, models of desire to emulate.

Get the show notes at aom.is/wanting.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jaksot(1159)

Truths Your Therapist Won't Tell You About How to Get Your Mind Right

Truths Your Therapist Won't Tell You About How to Get Your Mind Right

When people visit a therapist's office for help with their depression, they often don't find the relief they're seeking. That's because much of the counsel that is traditionally given doesn't offer th...

14 Huhti 55min

You’ve Been Pooping Wrong — Here’s How to Do It Better

You’ve Been Pooping Wrong — Here’s How to Do It Better

Pooping. Everybody does it, but a lot of people are embarrassed to talk about it. That's a shame, my guest says, not only because your digestive health is incredibly linked to your overall health, but...

7 Huhti 49min

The Mystery of Courage

The Mystery of Courage

Courage is one of our most prized and celebrated virtues. But once you really start exploring it, the nature of courage is surprisingly hard to pin down.Here to help us explore the fascinating complic...

31 Maalis 56min

The Mental Skills for Becoming an Everyday Genius

The Mental Skills for Becoming an Everyday Genius

We tend to think of genius as something you’re born with — a rare trait possessed by the Einsteins and Teslas of the world. But what if many of the abilities we associate with genius — a great memory,...

24 Maalis 49min

The Hidden Power of Heat — How a Good Sweat Heals Your Body and Mind

The Hidden Power of Heat — How a Good Sweat Heals Your Body and Mind

Cold exposure has gotten a lot of attention the past few years, with people dunking themselves in ice baths for the sake of their health and well-being. But, good news here, exposing yourself to heat ...

17 Maalis 47min

The Invisible Limits Holding You Back (And How to Change Them)

The Invisible Limits Holding You Back (And How to Change Them)

When we fail to make desired progress in life, most of us put the blame on physical and environmental limits. But my guest says that what's really holding people back is what's in their heads.Nir Eyal...

10 Maalis 51min

The Power of a Purpose-Driven Life

The Power of a Purpose-Driven Life

When it comes to building a happy and meaningful life, most of us rely on a grab bag of strategies — habits and goals around work, relationships, and health. But my guest today would argue that in the...

3 Maalis 53min

Born to Carry — How to Build Strength, Stamina, and Sanity Through Rucking

Born to Carry — How to Build Strength, Stamina, and Sanity Through Rucking

If you're looking for a way to improve your fitness, boost your mental health, and reconnect with a deeply human activity — all without going to the gym or pounding your knees on a daily run — then ru...

24 Helmi 51min

Suosittua kategoriassa Koulutus

rss-murhan-anatomia
voi-hyvin-meditaatiot-2
psykopodiaa-podcast
rss-narsisti
rss-liian-kuuma-peruna
adhd-podi
rss-rahamania
rss-niinku-asia-on
psykologia
rss-tietoinen-yhteys-podcast-2
puhutaan-koiraa
kesken
rss-psykalab
rss-valo-minussa-2
rss-duodecim-lehti
rss-vapaudu-voimaasi
rss-rentotapaus
rss-lasnaolon-hetkia-mindfulness-tutuksi
rss-luonnollinen-synnytys-podcast
rss-hereilla