Episode 80:COVID to Confidence: PeteLDNFF on Growth, Grit & Letting Go

Episode 80:COVID to Confidence: PeteLDNFF on Growth, Grit & Letting Go

This week on Brolapse, Ryan James sits down with UK creator PeteLDNFF for a conversation that goes way deeper than you’d expect.


What starts as a story about discovering fisting turns into something much bigger—growth, resilience, and learning how to trust your body. Pete opens up about his early struggles, from painful setbacks and injuries to nearly giving up altogether, before finally finding his rhythm during lockdown. Like a lot of people, COVID became an unexpected turning point—but for him, it unlocked something real.


The two dive into how access to better tools, patience, and consistency completely changed Pete’s experience, and why so many people get it wrong in the beginning. There’s a candid discussion about ego, pretending to be more experienced than you are, and why that mindset can backfire fast.


They also get into the mental side of it all—body confidence, putting yourself out there, and how content creation became a way for Pete to take control of how he saw himself. Losing over 80 pounds wasn’t just physical—it was the start of a bigger transformation.


Plus: chaotic toy sessions, the reality of editing burnout, wild event stories from Europe, and why chemistry and trust matter more than anything else. Whether you’re experienced or just curious, this episode is packed with real insight, humor, and a lot of “yeah… we’ve all been there” moments.


New episodes of Brolapse drop every Friday at 8PM. Spotify subscribers get early video access.

Episoder(81)

Episode 79: Inside the Fist Council: Community, Safety & the Future of Fisting

Episode 79: Inside the Fist Council: Community, Safety & the Future of Fisting

This week on Brolapse, Ryan James sits down with Sofftpaw for a conversation that goes far beyond a typical guest interview.Sofftpaw is the founder of the Fist Council — a nationwide forum made up of ...

21 Mar 50min

Episode 78: Gaping Femboy Energy: Pup Davey on Fisting, Puppy Play, Gender Fluidity & Kink Culture

Episode 78: Gaping Femboy Energy: Pup Davey on Fisting, Puppy Play, Gender Fluidity & Kink Culture

In this episode of Brolapse, Ryan James (HungerFF) sits down with Belgian creator Pup Davey for one of the most wide-ranging and honest conversations the show has had yet.Davey opens up about discover...

14 Mar 38min

Episode 77: From Addiction Counselor to Fisting Top: Grayson Howell on Confidence, Kink, and Chicago’s Scene

Episode 77: From Addiction Counselor to Fisting Top: Grayson Howell on Confidence, Kink, and Chicago’s Scene

In Episode 77 of Brolapse, Ryan James (HungerFF) sits down with Chicago-based creator Grayson Howell to talk about the unexpected path that led him into content creation, kink culture, and the world o...

7 Mar 32min

Episode 76: Josh Mikael — Truth, Trauma, and Why Not Everyone Deserves Your Story

Episode 76: Josh Mikael — Truth, Trauma, and Why Not Everyone Deserves Your Story

In this raw and deeply personal episode of Brolapse, Ryan James sits down with one of his closest friends and former roommate, Josh Mikael, for a conversation that spans decades of history, hard truth...

28 Feb 1h 16min

Episode 75: From First Fist to Full Confidence: Ian Greene on Growth, Boundaries & Trusting Your Body

Episode 75: From First Fist to Full Confidence: Ian Greene on Growth, Boundaries & Trusting Your Body

This week on Brolapse, HungerFF sits down with Ian Greene for a long-overdue conversation that spans years of crossing paths, shared experiences, and personal evolution.Ian opens up about his fisting ...

21 Feb 18min

Episode 74: John Thomas — Fantasy, Responsibility, and the Reality Behind the Scene

Episode 74: John Thomas — Fantasy, Responsibility, and the Reality Behind the Scene

In Episode 74 of Brolapse, HungerFF sits down with ⁠John Thomas⁠ for a conversation that goes far beyond the surface of porn.John opens up about his fisting origin story, growing up with religion, gui...

14 Feb 47min

Episode 73: Wyld Ryder: Becoming the Pig You Are

Episode 73: Wyld Ryder: Becoming the Pig You Are

In this episode of Brolapse, Ryan James sits down with Chicago-based creator Wyld Ryder for a candid conversation about confidence, kink, and the slow burn of becoming fully yourself.Wyld opens up abo...

7 Feb 28min

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