170: The Chronicles Part 2 - Metal Massacre III and Hair Metal

“What do you wanna do with your life?”

For everyone still trying to recover from “the prior episode” we understand you’ve endured a lot and assure you that it’s about to get even more surreal. Think of THE CHRONICLES: Part II as a 2-part episode embedded within the second half of The Chronicles, like appetizers before the main course or, using a more apropos food analogy, a “Turducken” of Metal if you will.

For starters, it’s back to 1983 for a tasting of early metal compiled by Brian Slagel and Metal Blade Records for METAL MASSACRE III including (and of utmost importance) Slayer, as well as a veritable plethora of other bands who gave us a glimpse of the future of 80’s metal that was yet to be born.

Then for the main course, we indulged in a generous cornucopia of 80’s HAIR METAL music videos that we enjoyed as youngsters coming of age during the bygone days of yore when Music Television was still a new concept and five bucks in quarters bought an entire day of bliss at the video arcade.

Prepare to embrace 80’s metal Zen through enlightened states of twanglification, be sure to keep your “Fast Times” and “Karate Kid” cast members straight, and then “touch hands” and start “motoring” because it’s time to get “sideways” and give thanks as you JOIN US for a heavy metal double header on this, the exciting conclusion of our trip through THE CHRONICLES.

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Show Notes:

(00:01): “I felt a little weird earlier…” / Can you believe we actually made it through a #KISS episode on THIS show? / The word is #pica / “This is the next one…” / #thisepisodesclinkyoftheepisode #SinEater / ***WELCOME BACK TO THE METAL NERDERY PODCAST!!!*** WARNING #listenerdiscretionisadvised / Shroom Chronicles Part II: The Peak / #Selfabuse from #theblackdog / Positivity at the Hetfield house #ReverendHetfield and #positiveaffirmations (and #ReverendBon) #imstillgonnasayit / “#Powerage is the perfect #inbetweenalbum / #slowadultDamone #arresteddevelopmentDamone and “knowing the difference” / “I think she gave #greathead in #TheKarateKid…” / “You can’t even let people know you have those thoughts…” #ifeelworse / #shesstillhot / #bossbitch vs #bossasshole / #relaxerlatebloomerASMR #cricketsASMR #WelcomeToTheMattShow / #greasygrin aka #permagrin

(12:21): #thisepisodesbeeroftheepisode (and #RussellsReflectionsASMR) #elevenpercentalcoholABV #NewHollandBrewingCompany #DragonsMilk #youguysarefuckedASMR #brewerering #alottaauras #badprobrem / “C’mere, #Dragontits!” / “We can do a combo…” / The #predocket #Docket: #MetalBladeRecords #MetalMassacre Metal Massacre III AND Various Hair Metal Selections #thepriorepisode #herestherules / “#Thegreatestfarts” and “a deck of cards” / ***CHECK US OUT ON THE SOCIALS, SEND US AN EMAIL AT METALNERDERY@GMAIL.COM AND IF YOU REALLY WANNA TELL US HOW YOU FEEL YOU CAN FEEL TOLL FREE TO LEAVE US A VOICEMAIL AT 980-666-8182!!!*** #yeahhhh

(18:58): “There’s gonna be a LOT of reaching…” #markthetime / The Chronicles Part II /Side A: The Psilo: Metal Massacre III / (Put on your #1983 hat for this…) / #Slayer #nottheReignInBloodVersion AGGRESSIVE PERFECTOR #killeropener / “What was the evillest thing you’d heard from ’83?” / #BlackSabbath (From Born Again) STONEHENGE #creepyASMR #OMGASMR #IDKItsASMR (This is NOT on #MetalMassacreThree) #PinkSabbath TRASHED (#DeepSabbath or #BlackPurple) and thoughts on “Pyromania” (the album) #FisherTexMexTrailMix #foodnoiseASMR / #Bitch (back to #MMIII) RIDING IN THUNDER #metalPatBenatar / #Tyrant ARMAGEDDON #KingDiamondish and/or #MercyfulFateish (Think Cronos meets King Diamond) / “It was shoved in there…” / #VenomMeetsKingDiamond / “The word is #genre” / #ComboMegaMixASMR (including a touch of DISTURBING THE PRIEST)

(37:30): #Medusa PIRANHAS (NOTE: keep in mind that a lot of these were likely from #demotapes back in the day…young bands sending in their #shittah to try and get signed to the mighty #MetalBladeRecords) #earlymetal / #faceyourfears #piranhagloryhole and a #rimshot to boot / ***“Is #GunsNRoses considered #hairmetal?”*** / *Moments with #MrUnicorn* / More #RussellsReflections and the fall of hair metal / #GNR #LiveAtTheRitz/ #onmicburpASMR / “I guess we can all be #timelords now”/ #TestPattern BITE THE KNIFE / “#YngwieMalmsteen IS #DungeonHairMetal” / #BlackWidow BLITZKRIEG / “Dragons shouldn’t be allowed to have tits…” / “How many riffs can YOU cram into a single song!?” / “Is it Poem or Pome?” #exhaustingoffputtingandirresponsibleASMR

(53:38): #Warlord MRS. VICTORIA (King Diamond meets Styx) / “Lets all go the way…” / #VirginSteele LET’S GO ALL THE WAY (“It’s like a weird Foghat…”) / #Sexist FIRE AND WIND / “I’m makin’ shit up…” / #GNRTangentionalASMR / “You have to mine for art…” / ***INTERMISSION*** / “It feels so good to empty your balls…” #itscalledscience / #theloudestfartintheworld / “I like that you used ‘thunderous’…” / #waitforit / Making up fancy, big words… #bifurcateASMR / #Znowhite HELL BENT (See also #CycloneTemple) / #Marauder THE KID #cowbellASMR / NOTE: Mr. Unicorn is actually #theblackdog / #LaMort FIST AND CHAIN #killercloser #MotleyMetal / “We needed a palette cleanser in between #KISS and #HairMetal…”

(1:09:25): The Chronicles Part II / Side B: The Cybin: 80’s HAIR METAL / ***“Where (and with whom) did hair metal begin?”*** / Early predecessors of hair metal / #thirdshowenergy / “Assless is the word you’re looking for…” / #asslesschapsASMR / #Whitesnake SLOW AN’ EASY (Fun Fact: Whitesnake is directly tangentional to #DeepPurple) / “It’s how female roast beef should be handled…”/ #musicvideoASMR (put your #1984 hat on) / “Growing like a soft boner…”/ #leatherballs #MCTentacleChoice #NightRanger SISTER CHRISTIAN (*technically, this is WAY worse than KISS*) / “We are way too wasted for this…” / #NOThairmetalASMR / #AldoNova FANTASY (Refer to #thepriorepisode) “All he’s missing is the #glovesofshame” (Put on your 1981 hat for this one…) / #Autograph TURN UP THE RADIO (back to 1984…we’re doing the #musicvideoversions of these songs). / #Ratt ROUND AND ROUND (more goodness from 1984) #guitarsoloASMR

(1:28:26): “When I was a kid, I loved this band…” / #Cinderella NOBODY’S FOOL (actually, not New York: but Philadelphia) from 1986 / #Warrant UNCLE TOM’S CABIN (1990) and the justification for liking it / #StrongerThanBalls #FarBeyondBalls / The 2nd #SkidRow album in 1991 SLAVE TO THE GRIND (NOTE: Skid Row and the mighty #Pantera actually toured together on this album)

(1:37:38): The true beginning of hairmetal: #MotleyCrue LIVE WIRE (1981) #myhonk and the downfall of the mighty Motley / “So where is it, Jimmy?” / Ummm…what? / SMOKIN’ IN THE BOYS ROOM (1985) ***LEAVE US A VOICEMAIL AT 980-666-8182!!!*** / “On some level, they ALL talk like that…” / From 1984… “What do you wanna do with your life!?” #TwistedSister I WANNA ROCK (definitely peep the video) #officialmusicvideo / #QuietRiot (1983) #killeropener METAL HEALTH (The Marshall full-stack of metal voices…)

(1:49:47): #Accept BALLS TO THE WALL (1983) #NotHairMetalASMR / The definition of hair metal vs glam metal vs just metal (there’s a very specific look and sound to #hairmetal) #GreatWyattShue / “That was NOT soft!” #markthetime / #YngwieMalmsteen TRILOGY SUITE OP: 5 (1986: Three headed dragons and the master of neoclassical #DungeonHairMetal) / The middle acoustic part of this song is insane! / “Here’s where it gets better…” / #MCTentacleChoice #hairmetalclassic “That’s their Load…” / #verticalnothorizontal / #DefLeppard #allbonedup (“You know how it is…when you get #songbone”) STAGEFRIGHT (1983) “I said welcome to my show!” / The Bob Rock of the 80’s… / “Dude would you ever marinate somebody?” / ***What is the #greatesthairmetalsong ever!?*** / “Step inside, walk this way…” #thevideoversion POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME #jumptheshark / #Warrant CHERRY PIE #recordscratchASMR / #hairmetalmindrapeASMR #untilthenext / ***THANK YOU FOR JOINING US FOR THIS, THE COMPELLING CONCLUSION TO THE CHRONICLES!!!*** / Go check out our vast selection of items at our #BunkerPoonGiftShoppe which can be found at metalnerdery.com/merch / #longoutroreel #chroniclesoutro #theend #fromthebeginning