An E + M Mini: Triangulation: When Two Becomes Three (And Why That's a Problem)

An E + M Mini: Triangulation: When Two Becomes Three (And Why That's a Problem)

The third episode in our family systems series explores triangulation, the pattern where a two-person relationship becomes unstable so you pull in a third person to stabilize it. Instead of dealing with issues directly with your spouse, you complain to your mom, get your best friend to tell them they're wrong, focus all your energy on the kids, or text your sister about your marriage. Triangulation feels safer than direct conflict because it gives you validation and emotional support without vulnerability, but it doesn't actually solve anything. Christa breaks down how each Enneagram type triangulates and also gives general tips in this quick, must-listen holiday prep episode! But here's the nuance: sometimes you need to triangulate for a moment. Listen for how to do both! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com if you're not on the email list yet. Watch on YouTube! Get your "Me-Time Coaching Session" package here! https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/coachingpackages-2 Use code BLACKFRIDAY for 50% off here! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Get on our Advent adventure together too where we'll discuss hope, love, and joy starting December 1st at ⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠. Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Listener Requested Interview Flip: Christa’s Work in Marriage &  Family Systems  w/Hannah Hardin, 4

Listener Requested Interview Flip: Christa’s Work in Marriage & Family Systems w/Hannah Hardin, 4

In this special listener-requested episode, the tables turn! Christa's daughter Hannah (the graphic designer behind Enneagram and Marriage) takes over as host to interview Christa about the questions ...

25 Feb 41min

How Your Type Processes Conflict (Attachment Series Finale) w/Jeff Cook, 1

How Your Type Processes Conflict (Attachment Series Finale) w/Jeff Cook, 1

In this final episode of the attachment series, Christa sits down with another Enneagram expert, Jeff Cook, Enneagram Type 1, philosopher, former pastor, and co-host of the popular Around the Circle E...

23 Feb 1h 4min

What Secure Attachment Actually Looks Like (And What To Do to Get It!)

What Secure Attachment Actually Looks Like (And What To Do to Get It!)

In this episode, Christa breaks down one of the most hopeful concepts in attachment theory: earned secure attachment. You are NOT stuck with the attachment style you developed in childhood. Whether yo...

18 Feb 31min

Don't Settle for Lonely: Relationships Your Soul Needs Now w/Alli Patterson, Type 8

Don't Settle for Lonely: Relationships Your Soul Needs Now w/Alli Patterson, Type 8

In this episode, Christa sits down with Alli Patterson, type 8 (8-1 pairing), teaching Pastor at Crossroads Church, author of Blueprint for Belonging and How to Stay Standing, and founder of the Ignit...

16 Feb 55min

Valentine's Special: Attachment Styles Meet Enneagram for Every Type ❤️

Valentine's Special: Attachment Styles Meet Enneagram for Every Type ❤️

In this episode, Christa continues the February series on Attachment Styles Meets Enneagram by walking through all nine types and exploring two critical questions: How do you attach well to yourself, ...

11 Feb 28min

This Little Fire of Mine: Addressing Doubt as You Build a Bolder Faith w/Kendall Mariah, Type 3

This Little Fire of Mine: Addressing Doubt as You Build a Bolder Faith w/Kendall Mariah, Type 3

In this conversation, Christa sits down with Kendall Mariah, author of the brand-new book This Little Fire of Mine: How Flickers of Doubt Can Spark a Bolder, Brighter Faith, to explore what happens wh...

9 Feb 45min

Attachment: Anxious Meets Avoidant - The Most Common (and Painful) Dance in Marriage

Attachment: Anxious Meets Avoidant - The Most Common (and Painful) Dance in Marriage

In this mini but important episode, Christa tackles the most common, and most painful, dynamic in marriage: the anxious-avoidant pairing. If you've ever felt like you're constantly chasing your spouse...

4 Feb 17min

Using Your Voice in Marriage: The Cost of Being Too Quiet w/Colette Jane Fehr, Type 7

Using Your Voice in Marriage: The Cost of Being Too Quiet w/Colette Jane Fehr, Type 7

What if the real reason marriages fail isn't a lack of connection but years of staying silent and avoiding conflict? Licensed marriage and family therapist Colette Jane Fehr joins us in an attachment-...

2 Feb 41min

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