S7 Ep. 1: Is Great Sex and a Great Relationship Even Possible, I'm a 29-Year-Old Virgin, and How Do I Guide My Daughter Who Might Be Gay?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:

1) I was in a relationship for 10 years and the sex was never great, but I felt safe and supported and in a lot of ways, I loved my life. We were both each other’s first boyfriend/girlfriend, but we barely had sex and I didn't feel desired. On the rare occasions we did, he’d lose his erection. I tried to get him to feel comfortable talking about sex and be more interested in it, but it felt more like a brother and sister relationship. After three years of therapy, I decided I wanted more and ended the marriage. I have been successfully dating since then, been having great sex, and even tried sex clubs. But I haven't felt the same safety and security in a relationship since. I had great sex with one guy and the chemistry was off the charts, but he wasn't very nice to me. I’m now worried I ended it with my husband looking for a fantasy. Can you have great sex and great friendship in a relationship? Or, is there always a sacrifice? Should I have tried harder to get him interested in sex? My ex-husband is getting married again so he must have sorted things out with his new partner.

2) I’m a 29-year-old virgin. It’s not for religious reasons, and I’m not waiting for marriage. Sex just didn’t feel right for me growing up, but now I feel like the pressure is mounting as I get older. I’m worried what a future partner or fling will say. Will they find my inexperience unsexy? How should I handle the situation, and what advice can you give me to prepare?

3) My daughter is 16. We're very close, and I've always been very open with her about sex. She's never expressed a romantic or sexual interest in anyone until last week when she told me she's "not straight" and has a crush on a girl at school. I'm actually relieved that she is having normal teenage feelings. My question is how, as a straight woman, to best support her and continue to educate her about sex in the coming years? What conversations might we need to have that are particular to her sexuality? Should I seek out a gay woman for her to confide in? To be clear, she has not expressed any need for additional support. I'm just a mum trying to be prepared.

To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU

Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

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