EP427 – Tantra: The Art of Conscious Intimacy

Welcome to Episode 459 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Matthew Bennett, who speaks to me about life as a porn creator, the realities of OnlyFans, and how kink skills can translate into everyday life and even the workplace.In this conversation, Matthew opens up about his unexpected journey into adult content creation, sharing both the challenges and rewards of working on platforms like OnlyFans and JustForFans. We talk about how fetish and kink content often push against mainstream limitations, the misconceptions around creator earnings, and the importance of understanding consent and boundaries when producing explicit material.English Leather Master (often known as ELM), also known to friends and family as Matthew, is an ICF (International Coach Federation) PCC-accredited life and executive coach and a BSCH (British Society of Clinical Hypnosis) registered hypnotherapist. He also trains individuals in both coaching and hypnosis. Matthew works extensively with LGBTQ+ and kinky communities around the world, supporting people in creating more fulfilling lives. His passion lies in helping others unlock the skills they already possess to enhance their chances of success and happiness across all areas of life.In this episode, you will hear:·      Matthew’s Journey Into Porn Creation·      The Rise And Limitations Of OnlyFans·      Why Fetish Content Pushes Against Mainstream Rules·      Myths About How Much Money Creators Make·      The Pros And Cons Of Porn Consumption·      How Kinks Like Balloons And Car Pedals Find Their Audience·      The Difference Between Studio Porn And Creator Porn·      Why Communication Is Key To Being A Good Lover·      Using BDSM Consent Models In The Workplace·      Creating A Life Without Shame Around SexualityThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo Productions Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

7 Okt 37min

Welcome to Episode 458 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Sarah Intelligator, a divorce attorney and author who brings such a fascinating perspective on dating, relationships, and why so many marriages end the way they do.Sarah shares how two decades in family law, and her own journey through divorce and remarriage, have shaped her perspective on why relationships break down. She has seen the same patterns repeat themselves in countless cases, and she is passionate about helping people understand those pitfalls before it’s too late. Sarah Intelligator is a divorce attorney in Los Angeles, California. She earned a Juris Doctorate from Southwestern Law School. She graduated from UCLA, cum laude, with a Bachelor of Arts in English. Practicing Family Law since 2008, Sarah has also been a yoga instructor since 2000. She organically bridged her two worlds, coining the term: “Holistic Divorce and Family Law.” In helping others through their divorces, Sarah realised that she could help them avoid divorce altogether.In this episode, you will hear:·      Common Patterns Behind Divorce·      The Importance Of Sexual Compatibility·      Resentment As A Hidden Relationship Killer·      How Children Shift Intimacy In Marriage·      Emotional Needs And The Roots Of Affairs·      Changing Old Dating Patterns·      Core Values Versus Shifting Needs·      The Trap Of Fairy Tale Expectations·      How Communication Protects Connection·      Choosing Partners From A Place Of WorthThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

30 Sep 28min

Welcome to Episode 457 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm excited to be joined by Kevin Patterson who speaks to me about polyamory, representation, and emotional literacy.In this conversation, Kevin shares his journey into consensual non-monogamy and the inspiration behind Poly Role Models, a project designed to broaden representation of polyamory beyond narrow stereotypes. Kevin Patterson is an active member of the Philadelphia polyamory community. He's been practicing ethical nonmonogamy since August of 2002 after opening up a relationship that eventually became his marriage. In April of 2015, Kevin was inspired to start Poly Role Models, an interview series for people describing their experiences with polyamory. Poly Role Models was part of a drive and a desire to change the way our lives and communities are viewed. To continue that discussion of polyamorous representation, Kevin has extended the blog's work into the writing of the book, Love's Not Color Blind: Race and Representation in Polyamorous and Other Alternative Communities. In this episode, you will hear:·      Origins Of Poly Role Models·      Breaking Stereotypes In Polyamory·      Representation Beyond White Narratives·      Cheating Versus Consensual Non-Monogamy·      The Pitfalls Of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell·      Race And Identity In Non-Monogamy·      Navigating Jealousy With Emotional Literacy·      Building Healthier Conversations In Relationships·      Creating Safer And More Inclusive Spaces·      Kevin’s Work In Fiction And Superhero StorytellingThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

23 Sep 27min

Welcome to Episode 456 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Allana Pratt, Annette Benedetti, Caitlin V, Dr. Margaret Cochran, Rob Kancler, Susan Bratton, and Sylvia Solit who help me answer one powerful question: What’s one thing women wish men knew about sex, but almost never say out loud?Across this conversation, our guests share profound insights into how women truly experience desire and intimacy. You’ll hear why slowing down, building safety, and creating emotional connection are essential foundations for passion. We discuss the hidden fantasies and longings that many women never voice, the importance of curiosity and play, and how sex is far more than just physical technique, it’s a whole-body, mind, and spirit experience. Our guests also emphasize how communication itself can be deeply erotic, and that balancing sensitivity with power opens the door to deeper intimacy.In this episode, you will hear:·      Allana Pratt On Safety And Slow Build-Up·      Annette Benedetti On Hidden Desires·      Caitlin V On Whole-Body Sex·      Dr. Margaret Cochran On Why Talk Is Sexy·      Rob Kancler On Sensitivity And Power·      Susan Bratton On Seduction And Play·      Sylvia Solit On Sex As A Continuum·      Women’s Bodies And Arousal Timing·      Overcoming Shame And Cultural Scripts·      Integrating Emotional And Spiritual ConnectionTake My Optimal Performance Course and Say Goodbye to Erectile Unpredictability and Unlock Endless Potential in the Bedroom! Thank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

16 Sep 19min

Welcome to Episode 455 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Dr. Elisabeth Sheff who speaks to me about consensual non-monogamy, polyamory, and soloamory.In this episode, Dr. Eli shares her personal journey navigating relationships with both monogamous and polyamorous partners, and how those experiences shaped her professional research. We talk in-depth about "soloamory" which refers to prioritizing one's relationship with themselves, often in the form of self-love. It is a form of autosexuality/autoromance and a conscious choice to live a single life, valuing autonomy and personal growth over traditional relationship milestones like marriage or cohabitation. Dr. Elisabeth “Eli” Sheff is a researcher, expert witness, coach, speaker, and educational consultant. With a PhD in Sociology and certification as a Sexuality Educator from AASECT, Dr. Eli specializes in gender and sexual minority families, consensual non-monogamy, and kink/BDSM. Sheff is the foremost academic expert on polyamorous families with children, and her 25+ year Polyamorous Family Study is the only longitudinal study of poly families with children to date. In this episode, you will hear:·      Defining Consensual Non-Monogamy·      Understanding Polyamory And Soloamory·      How Early Relationships Shape Our Beliefs·      Mono-Poly Relationship Dynamics·      Distinguishing Between Jealousy And Insecurity·      Why Some People Are Wired For Multiplicity·      The Role Of Autonomy In Healthy Relationships·      Healing Through Solo Amory And Self-Love·      The Importance Of Therapy And The Right Therapist Fit·      Resources And Tools From Dr. Elizabeth SheffThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

9 Sep 44min

Welcome to Episode 454 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I’m excited to be joined by Sam L. Feldman, who speaks to me about ethical non-monogamy, swinging, and the evolution of sexual liberation across the decades.In this episode, Sam shares insights from his book Hookups, Hiccups and Happenstances, which reflects on the changing landscape of sexuality from the 1960s and 70s through to today. We discuss the social shifts that empowered women during this period, the origins of swinging, and how personal boundaries and communication have shaped Sam’s own 62-year marriage.Married for 61 years and counting, Sam is an excellent spokesperson on love and the many ways it can be explored. A number of the “hookups” he writes about in his book come from his real experiences of being in “the right place at the right time” during the Sexual Revolution. He also says he invented a sex position in this era. The position he's dubbed "the corkscrew” takes three people, unlike his other favorite position: 69.In this episode, you will hear:·      Evolution Of Sexual Liberation In The 60s And 70s·      Origins Of Swinging And Key Clubs·      Women’s Empowerment And Reproductive Rights·      Sam’s 62-Year Marriage And Communication Pact·      Seven Rules For Navigating Non-Monogamy·      Boundaries Between Love And Sex·      Transparency And Openness In Long-Term Relationships·      How Date Nights Strengthen Connection·      Addressing Jealousy In Non-Monogamy·      Swinging Culture And Common MisconceptionsThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

2 Sep 31min

Welcome to Episode 453 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I’m excited to be joined by Serenity Cox and partner Timothy of WIFEY, who speak with me about their journey into the hotwifing lifestyle and how it has shaped their relationship.In this episode, Serenity and Timothy share how their interest in hotwifing began as fantasy and roleplay, before eventually evolving into real-life exploration. We discuss the turning point in their relationship during the pandemic, how they navigated their first experiences, and the emotional challenges and growth that came with moving from imagination into reality.Serenity Cox is a Canadian adult performer and content creator who transitioned from a successful career as an ER nurse to becoming one of the industry’s most sought-after stars. Since starting her career, she has gained massive popularity through independent content creation and collaborations with major studios, earning multiple awards, including the 2024 xHamster Creator of the Year and the 2025 XBIZ XMA Fan Award for ‘Favorite MILF Performer’.In this episode, you will hear:·      Defining Hotwifing·      Fantasy vs. Reality in Relationships·      The Pandemic as a Turning Point·      Emotional Challenges and Surprises·      Importance of Reconnection Rituals·      Navigating Jealousy in Non-Monogamy·      Safety Practices and STI Testing·      Communicating Fantasies with a Partner·      Managing Cultural Stigma Around CNM·      Resources for Exploring HotwifingThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

26 Aug 32min

Welcome to Episode 452 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Roy Graff who speaks to me about relationship anarchy, consensual non-monogamy, and the importance of communication in alternative relationship structures.In this episode, Roy shares his deeply personal journey from decades of serial monogamy to embracing polyamory as an orientation and ultimately finding resonance in the philosophy of relationship anarchy. We explore the difference between open relationships and ethical non-monogamy, the role of emotional maturity, and how boundaries and communication can transform romantic connections. Roy Graff is a Psychosynthesis Relationship Counsellor based in London, UK. Drawing on his training and over nine years of experience facilitating workshops and group work, Roy supports clients in exploring the full spectrum of their physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual dimensions. His practice is inclusive and affirming of Gender, Sex, and Relationship Diversity (GSRD), welcoming LGBTQ+ individuals and those in non-monogamous relationships. In addition to his counselling work, Roy is a relationship coach specializing in alternative and non-traditional relationship dynamics, helping individuals and partners build resilience, improve communication, manage conflict, and deepen empathetic, conscious connections.In this episode, you will hear:·      Roy’s Journey From Serial Monogamy To Polyamory·      How Relationship Anarchy Challenges Social Norms·      The Difference Between Ethical And Unethical Non-Monogamy·      Why Communication Is The Foundation Of Alternative Relationships·      Navigating Jealousy And Emotional Triggers·      The Role Of Boundaries In Polyamorous Dynamics·      Strategies For Sharing Information About Other Partners·      Understanding The “Relationship Escalator”·      How Solo Polyamory Works In PracticeThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

19 Aug 41min