Help! The Royals are Coming for Tea (1)

From the Tudors to King Charles III, the royals have always been close to spies. Listen to find out!Today’s monarchs get discreet MI5 briefings — but back in Elizabeth I’s day, her spymaster Francis Walsingham was inventing the modern secret service with beer-barrel dead drops, forged letters, and a plot that sent Mary Queen of Scots to the block.This episode of Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things dives into the wildest tales of royal espionage: Christopher Marlowe, the playwright who may have been a double agent; John Dee, the Queen’s astrologer signing his reports “007”; and Queen Victoria’s Indian confidant Abdul Karim, hounded as a foreign spy by jealous courtiers. Fast forward to World War II and you’ll find Hitler’s agents scheming to kidnap Edward VIII and put him back on the throne as a Nazi puppet.Plots, paranoia, and velvet cushions hiding sharpened daggers — when royalty meets espionage, the truth is stranger than any Bond film.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

28 Sep 23min

“Off with his head!” may be the most famous royal sentence ever passed — but what happens before the axe falls? Can kings and queens actually be locked up like the rest of us? Listen to find out!On today’s episode of Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things, Kate Williams and Robert Hardman dig into the murky history of royal captivity — where velvet cushions meet iron bars, and sovereign immunity doesn’t always save the day.We’ve got Charles I, the would-be master of disguise who chopped off his beard, called himself “Harry,” and still managed to end up wedged in a castle window like Winnie the Pooh after too much honey. We’ve got Mary Queen of Scots, forever scheming her way out of tower rooms and washer-woman costumes, until Elizabeth I finally lost patience. And we’ve got Marie Antoinette, who began her confinement with upholstered chairs and charity visits, but ended it humiliated, stripped of dignity, and walking towards the guillotine while the crowd jeered.Not all prison stories end with a block and blade. Some are quieter — and crueller. George III was never convicted of treason, never even plotted escape, yet he spent his last years effectively locked up in Windsor, a prisoner of his own mind and his doctors’ brutal “cures.” And in the 20th century, Hitler’s Colditz Castle became a surreal jail for royal hostages — cousins of the Queen turned into bargaining chips in the dying days of the war.So — can royals be jailed? History’s answer is complicated. Some lost their heads. Some lost their freedom. And some, like poor Princess Alice, were locked away simply for being inconvenient.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

21 Sep 29min

Trump’s coming to town — welcome to the towers of Windsor Castle. Hope you like ghosts!Royal biographer Robert Hardman and Prof. Kate Williams whisk us through the protocols of a state visit, Windsor-style: Air Force One → helicopter → the quadrangle, where (yes) the guest correctly walks in front of the monarch for the Guard of Honour. We peek into that turret guest suite with the Long Walk view, the St George’s Hall mega-table laid to the centimetre, and the post-1992 kitchens that keep 130 plates piping hot.We’ve the gossip: the day the Secret Service gave way and allowed Prince Philip to drive Barack Obama. Kate pits today’s three courses against Tudor 20-dish feasts (whale and dolphin, anyone?), and Robert explains why Windsor beats Buckingham Palace for security — and for dodging protests. We even invent a house cocktail: blood-red, jewel-bright, mildly dastardly.Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things now drops every Monday — Royal etiquette decoded, history demystified, and just enough hauntings to keep you peeking over your shoulder.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

14 Sep 26min

Who was the most monstrous queen — England’s Bloody Mary or France’s Serpent Queen? Listen to find out!This week on Queens, Kings, and Dastardly Things, royal historian Robert Hardman and Professor Kate Williams pit two formidable women against the seven deadly sins.Mary I of England, daughter of Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon, fought her way onto the throne and set out to restore Catholicism by fire. Three hundred Protestants met their end at the stake, earning her the chilling epithet “Bloody Mary.” Catherine de Medici, the Italian-born queen of France and mother of three kings, gained her own dark reputation as the “Serpent Queen.” Legend has her inventing high heels, perfecting the poisoned glove, and masterminding the St. Bartholomew’s Day massacre.From pearls and palaces to phantom pregnancies and poisoned perfumes, the judges weigh whether these reputations were deserved or distorted — and whether misogyny shaped how history remembers them.It’s England versus France, pyre versus poison, bonfires versus bechamel. Which queen was the deadlier sinner?Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

10 Sep 44min

Who was the most rotten king of all — treacherous John of England or Shakespeare’s wicked Richard III? Listen to find out!This week on Queens, Kings, and Dastardly Things, royal historian Robert Hardman and Professor Kate Williams drag two of England’s most notorious monarchs into the dock of history.Armed with the seven deadly sins as their scorecard, they weigh up pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath, and sloth. Richard III — the hunchbacked villain of Shakespeare, buried for centuries under a Leicester car park — is accused of dispatching nephews in the Tower and grasping for the throne at any cost. King John, youngest son of Henry II, nicknamed “Lackland” and “Softsword,” loses battles, loses crown jewels, and nearly loses his kingdom through arrogance, greed, and disastrous quarrels with the Pope.The judges weigh sanctuary ignored at Tewkesbury, excommunications, ill-fated marriages, and even a death by peaches and cider. From Robin Hood cartoons to scoliosis scans, this is royal villainy at its most grotesque — and occasionally absurd.It’s England v England, Plantagenet v Plantagenet, Shakespearean bogeyman v medieval tax-collector-in-chief. May the worst king win.And the royal rumble continues: next week it’s Bloody Mary v Catherine de Medici — a deadly contest of queens.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

3 Sep 37min

Who was history’s most monstrous monarch — Henry VIII of England or Louis XIV of France? Listen to find out!This week on Queens, Kings, and Dastardly Things, royal historian Robert Hardman and Professor Kate Williams sharpen their quills and their wits.Armed with the seven deadly sins as a scorecard, they put these two titans of royal misbehaviour through their paces. Pride? Henry struts about in padded sleeves and bans the middle classes from wearing fur. Louis builds Versailles — all 2,300 rooms of it — just so the Sun King can bask in his own reflection. Greed? Henry smashes up the monasteries and pockets the loot; Louis keeps ledgers in his pocket as if they were sweet wrappers. Lust? Both monarchs are formidable contenders — one leaves a trail of wives and mistresses (and the odd execution), the other an entire shadow dynasty of illegitimate children.From whale meat and beaver tails to an autopsy revealing a stomach three times the normal size, gluttony is not in short supply either. And when it comes to wrath, Henry’s temper ensures that being “close to the king” could mean being close to the executioner.It’s England versus France, Tudor versus Bourbon, axe versus wig — with laughs, learning, and a dash of horror along the way.And the royal rumble doesn’t stop here: next week it’s King John v Richard III, followed by Bloody Mary v Catherine de Medici.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

27 Aug 26min

From meat mountains to one lonely kiwi fruit — the royal appetites that shocked history. Listen Now!What’s worse than one demanding royal houseguest? A whole history of them — and in Part Two of Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things, Robert Hardman and Kate Williams dig even deeper into the guest lists from hell. From Henry VIII arriving with a thousand-strong entourage and an appetite for entire herds, to George IV’s ruinous dining habits (and total lack of return invites), to Louis XIV’s epic, toothless feasts, this is royal hospitality at its most exhausting.You’ll discover which monarch forced hosts to build entirely new buildings just to serve them tea, which biscuits owe their names to the royals (and which ones hid the Crown Jewels), and how a simple “drop-in” could strip a nobleman’s pantry bare for months. It’s a whirlwind of Tudor meat mountains, Regency excess, and the occasional sensible snack — such as the Princess Royal’s legendary one kiwi fruit.Expect tall tales, staggering menus, and a fair amount of sympathy for the poor souls who dared to open their doors. Whether you’d serve up a banquet or hide behind the curtains, this episode is your ultimate survival guide to entertaining history’s hungriest and haughtiest VIPs.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

20 Aug 20min