EP149 - The Monogamy Paradox with Dr. Tammy Nelson

Welcome to episode 287 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Dr. Aditi Paul to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss how Dr Aditi became interested in hook-up culture, looking at the dating anxiety that exists within Gen Z and ways we can create successful hook-up dates.    Aditi Paul is a professor and mixed-methods researcher based in New York City.     She uses her multidisciplinary background in computer science and communication studies to examine the impact of using human-centered technologies like social networking sites and online dating services.     Aditi’s research has been published in top academic journals and has been featured in prominent media outlets such as The Washington Post, Women’s Health, The Telegraph UK, Huffington Post, NBCNews.     Her new book, "The Current Collegiate Hookup Culture: Dating Apps, Hookup Scripts, and Sexual Outcomes," is out on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, & Walmart.       In this episode, you will hear:     How Dr Aditi became interested in hookup culture How are dating apps changing hookup culture? Do dating apps help cultivate positive sexual experiences? Looking at the dating anxiety that exists within Gen Z The ways in which hookup sex is being re-defined Analyzing the ways dating has evolved over the past 10 years How we can create successful hookup dates How only 19% of straight women are being reciprocated with oral sex The ways in which porn is damaging our sexual expectations  Looking at the use of recreational drugs as a sexual enhancer How Sugar Daddy’s and Sugar Babies are very much a thing in 2022    Thank you to our Sponsor: Cozy Earth! Use code ‘Sexology’ for 40% off.  https://cozyearth.com/discount/SEXOLOGY   Find Dr. Aditi Paul Online  http://www.draditipaul.com     Sex Quiz for Women  https://oasis2care.com/sexquiz     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

21 Kesä 202245min

Welcome to episode 286 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Gigi Engle to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss swinging, the way in which the media portrays swinging versus the reality and the importance of consent when exploring swinging.    Gigi Engle, ACS, CSE, CSC, is an award-winning feminist author, certified sex  educator, and psychotherapist in training.     As a sex expert with ethical non-monogamy app, 3Fun, she promotes and teaches pleasure-based sex education, GSRD relationships, and safer sex practices.     Gigi’s work regularly appears in many publications including Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Elle Magazine, Teen Vogue, Glamour, and Women's Health. Her articles have been shared over 150 million times.     In 2019, Gigi was named Journalist of The Year at the Sexual Freedom Awards.     She is originally from Chicago and currently lives in London, UK.       In this episode, you will hear:     What is swinging?  Looking at how people discover they’re swingers  The way in which the media portrays swinging versus the reality  Why you shouldn’t open your relationship to save your relationship  The difference between swinging and polyamory   How we receive a lot of sex negative messaging throughout our lives  Where can people go to explore swinging?  Looking at the dynamics of who initiates swinging   The importance of consent when exploring swinging   How single women tend to be better welcomed than single men     Thank you to our Sponsor: Cozy Earth! Use code ‘Sexology’ for 40% off.  https://cozyearth.com/discount/SEXOLOGY   Find Gigi Engle Online  https://www.missgigiengle.com     Sex Quiz for Women  https://oasis2care.com/sexquiz     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

14 Kesä 202237min

Welcome to episode 285 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Kate Loree, LMFT to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss how Kate became involved in the non-monogamous community, looking at why more people are opting for non-monogamy, and how you can manage jealousy in non-monogamous relationships.    Kate Loree, LMFT, is a sex-positive licensed marriage and family therapist with a specialty in non-monogamous, kink, LGBTQ, and sex worker communities and the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships.     In addition to her master’s in marriage and family therapy, she also has an MBA and is a registered art therapist (ATR). She is an EDSE certified sex educator and an EMDR certified therapist with additional training in the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM) for the treatment of trauma. She has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003.     She cohosts her own sex-positive podcast, Open Deeply, with Sunny Megatron, has been featured in Buzzfeed videos, and has been a guest on Playboy Radio and many podcasts, including American Sex, Sluts and Scholars, and Sex Out Loud. She has written for Good Vibrations and Hollywood Magazine and is a frequent public speaker.       In this episode, you will hear:     How Kate became involved in the non-monogamous community  Understanding that non-monogamy is more popular than people realize  Looking at the different categories of people identify as non-monogamous How people can be sexually non-monogamous and emotionally monogamous The way in which the non-monogamous community has become diverse Looking at why more people are opting for non-monogamy Understanding the maturity needed to make non-monogamy work How you can manage jealously in non-monogamous relationships  Learning to communicate effectively with your partners around jealousy    Thank you to our Sponsor: Cozy Earth! Use code ‘Sexology’ for 40% off.  https://cozyearth.com/discount/SEXOLOGY   Find Kate Loree Online  https://kateloree.com     Sex Quiz for Women  https://oasis2care.com/sexquiz     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

7 Kesä 202241min

Welcome to episode 284 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Dr. Zhana Vrangalova to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss non-monogamous relationships, ways you can take small steps into non-monogamy and understanding the role of jealousy on this journey.    Dr. Zhana is an NYU adjunct professor of human sexuality and the creator of Open Smarter, an online course that guides couples and individuals through a safer opening up journey. She holds a PhD in Developmental Psychology from Cornell University, and her scholarly work on non-traditional relationship styles has been published in several peer-reviewed journals.      She's also a lifelong non-monogamist with extensive experience in many types of nonmonogamy. In January 2022, Ashley Madison commissioned a YouGov survey on nonmonogamy in consultation with Dr Zhana.     Follow her on Instagram or Twitter @drzhana, and join her FREE online monthly Open Smarter Socials events to discuss all things non/monogamy with non-judgmental people from all over the world.       In this episode, you will hear:     How Dr Zhana became involved in non-monogamy work  Understanding that non-monogamy isn’t for everyone  Looking at the limitations of monogamy  How a lot of needs for non-monogamy are biological  Ways you can take small steps into non-monogamy Understanding the role of jealousy How you can start opening conversion about non-monogamy if you have a partner Ways couple can assess if they want to open up the relationship Understanding if you’re personality type will lend itself to non-monogamy    Find Dr Zhana Online  https://www.drzhana.com     Sex Quiz for Women  https://oasis2care.com/sexquiz     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

31 Touko 202244min

Welcome to episode 283 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Kenneth Play to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss how Kenneth became a Sex Hacker, ways you can achieve multiple orgasms and cultivating energy for amazing foreplay.    Kenneth Play is an international sex expert and sex educator. Named the world’s greatest sex hacker by GQ, he has been featured by more than one hundred media outlets, including The New York Times, Men’s Health, Cosmopolitan, Huffington Post, and Nightline.      Kenneth has been a guest lecturer on female sexual pleasure at New York University and San Jose State University. His work has helped millions of men gain lasting confidence and competence. AskMen described Kenneth’s most recent course as having "at least one nugget of sexual learning you’ve almost certainly never encountered before, if not several."       In this episode, you will hear:     How Kenneth became a Sex Hacker  Can anyone have multiple orgasms?  Looking at the different types of orgasms  How women can continue having an orgasm when the clit is very sensitive  Ways you can best equip yourself with the tools needed for great orgasms The importance of foreplay for achieving multiple orgasms Cultivating energy for amazing foreplay Understanding a Lady Boner is  The importance of learning skills so you’re not shooting in the dark     Find Kenneth Play Online  https://kennethplay.com     Emjoy App (Free 14 Days Trial)  https://links.letsemjoy.com/ref/DRMOALI    101 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Hot  https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

24 Touko 202235min

Welcome to episode 282 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Dr Jennifer Lincoln to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss having sex on your period, how you can pay attention to your desire cycle, and how it’s normal for many women to feel more turned on during their period.    Jennifer Lincoln, MD, IBCLC, is a board-certified generalist obstetrician/gynecologist and attending physician in Portland, Oregon. She primarily works on labor and delivery as an OB hospitalist and loves the excitement and pace this work brings. Jennifer is also an International Board-Certified Lactation Consultant.     Jennifer received her undergraduate degree from Washington College in Chestertown, Maryland, where she graduated Summa Cum Laude. She received her medical degree from Tulane University in New Orleans, Louisiana, where she was a member of Alpha Omega Alpha, the nation’s honor medical society. She completed her residency at Oregon Health and Science University in Portland, Oregon.     Jennifer enjoys educating women about their bodies and their pregnancies. She has particular interests in adolescent medicine, breastfeeding advocacy, and supporting women in labor in an informed, relaxed manner. She currently serves on the Board of Directors for the Northwest Mothers Milk Bank as well as for the Society of OB/GYN Hospitalists.     She is happily married to a pediatrician and has two sons, one in elementary school and the other a preschooler, who teach her more everyday than any textbook could.       In this episode, you will hear:     Can we have sex during our period? What are the benefits of having sex on your period? How having sex on your period can act as a natural lubricant  Can you get pregnant while having sex on your period? How it’s normal for many women to feel more turned on during their period Exploring oral sex while on your period  Looking at “Menstrual Masking”  Can you reduce your period flow? How having sex on your period can be great in the shower Ways you can increase novelty into the relationship through period sex Learning to pay attention to your desire cycle    Find Dr Jennifer Lincoln Online  https://www.drjenniferlincoln.com     Emjoy App (Free 14 Days Trial)  https://links.letsemjoy.com/ref/DRMOALI    101 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Hot  https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

17 Touko 202234min

Welcome to episode 281 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Layla London to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss Layla’s journey to creating a sexual bucket list, why novelty is important to keep sex exciting and why stepping outside your comfort zone is important to explore sexuality.    Layla London is the girl next door who recently decided to explore her sexuality. After a 3.5-year, self-imposed, dry spell she woke up one day and said "What the heck am I doing to myself? Why have I just shut off that side of my sexuality? I need physical contact badly."     She decided to stop "wasting the pretty" and get out there! Having set out on her "sexual road trip" she is scratching things off her sex bucket list. Layla is getting laid, exploring "kinks" (a word she really didn't know anything about before this), having fun, sifting through the emotions it stirs up in her, blogging and podcasting about it anonymously       In this episode, you will hear:     How Layla dealt with celibacy   Why novelty is important to keep sex fresh and exciting  How celibacy drove Layla to explore her sexuality   Why Layla decided to create a sexual bucket list   The ways in which porn helped Layla explore her sexuality  Understanding the difference between ethical porn and sex education videos  Learning to communicate effectively with your partner about what you want  Looking at what Layla liked and disliked from her sexual exploration  The things that are still on Layla’s sexual bucket list   What are the common things on people’s sexual bucket list  Why stepping outside your comfort zone is important to explore sexuality   The importance of sexual negotiation and doing it in good faith     Find Layla London Online  https://www.thecuriousgirldiaries.com     Emjoy App (Free 14 Days Trial)  https://links.letsemjoy.com/ref/DRMOALI    101 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Hot  https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

10 Touko 202246min

Welcome to episode 280 of the Sexology Podcast! Today is a solo episode where we discuss the best ways to initiate sex.        In this episode, you will hear:     How couples in long term relationships can learn new ways to initiate sex   Ways you can add novelty into your relationship   The importance of reciprocation for a healthy sexual relationship   Understanding the arousal gap between men and women   Analyzing the responsive model of desire   How partners can become resentful of things that happen in a relationship  Using communication to improve your sex life with your partner  How a good sexual plan can be a game changer  Learning to take things slow so you can last longer  Overcoming issues of partners liking other people’s Instagram photos, leading to issues of anxiety and insecurity    The importance of having a relationship agreement  Setting realistic goals and expectations that you can both achieve     Find Dr. Nazanin Moali Online  http://sexologypodcast.com     Emjoy App (Free 14 Days Trial)  https://links.letsemjoy.com/ref/DRMOALI     101 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Hot  https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/     Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

3 Touko 202226min