The Anxious To Secure PODCAST25 Joulu 2025

111:10 truths about men I wish I KNEW SOONER when I was insecure (part 2)

10 Hard Truths to STOP Chasing (Anxious Attachment & Dating Advice)

If you’re an anxiously attached woman who keeps overthinking texts, overgiving in dating, and chasing emotionally unavailable men, this episode is for you 🖤✨

This is what I wish I knew in my 20s about men and relationships

before I burned myself out trying to be chosen, trying to be “easy to love,” and trying to make men stay.

In this podcast episode, I share dating advice for anxious attachment, explain how men actually fall in love, and why chasing, proving, and people-pleasing push men away instead of creating connection.

You’ll learn how to stop obsessing, stop abandoning yourself, set healthy boundaries, and attract secure, emotionally available men without playing games or pretending not to care.

This episode is especially for women struggling with relationship anxiety, fear of abandonment, limerence, and anxious-avoidant dating dynamics — the women who keep asking:

“Why do I care more than he does?” “Why do men pull away when I get attached?”

You’re not broken. This is about attachment wiring, not your worth 🔒🧠

💎 Courses

✨ Stop *FINALLY* Obsessing Over Texts (because YOU're BRIAN is the one creating YOUR anxiety,

NOT how they communicate with you)

➞ Grab It Here: https://www.julanoelle.com/textanxiety

💛 Free Stuff 30+ resources

Free Attachment Library

➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop

⏰ What you’ll learn in this episode:

00:00 Understanding Men's Love Dynamics 00:07 01. Understand how MEN fall in love (not what you think) 04:26 02. Let Him Be Your Hero 09:57 3. Men are attracted to confidence AND boundaries 12:30 4. Men fall for presence, not perfection 16:06 5. Physical intimacy creates FAST bonds - use it wisely 17:50 6. Men secretly love a woman obsessed with HERSELF 19:42 7. The more you abandon yourself, the more emotionally unavailable men show up 20:54 8. Give him freedom - the healthiest power move 23:07 9. Obsession is a signal - not love 24:34 10. Make Him Fear He Could Lose You 26:11 Summary

🖤 About me

I’m Jula, an attachment style coach. I help women stop chasing, stop overgiving, and attract secure love ✨

💌 Work with me

➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy

WhatsApp Coaching

➞ Start Here: https://www.julanoelle.com/textandtalk

DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.

This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.

This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.

Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

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Jaksot(137)

135: Your avoidant partner doesn’t prioritise you…UNLESS you do THIS.

grab your daily anxious-to-secure rewriting protocol so you no longer freak out when he pulls away. If you don’t feel like a priority in your relationship right now, with your dismissive avoidant part...

26 Touko 16min

134: 5 signs you’re in a toxic cycle with a dismissive avoidant partner (and how to break it)

GRAB here your SECURE WOMAN PROTOCOL to not freak out when he pulls away! If you keep overthinking texts, chasing reassurance, and feeling stuck in a hot and cold relationship… this is for you In thi...

19 Touko 13min

133: How to break the anxious avoidant cycle (without chasing HIM))

Grab here your SECURE WOMAN PROTOCOL to not freak out when he pulls away! How to break the anxious avoidant cycle without chasing him ❤️‍🩹 In this episode, I share why anxious and avoidant couples ...

12 Touko 14min

132: NEVER say this to an avoidant partner if you have anxious attachment (it will trigger him into shutdown))

Five things you should NEVER say to your avoidant partner UNLESS you want to trigger him to shut down or get defensive... If you keep thinking “why is he shutting down when I just ask for the bare m...

5 Touko 24min

131: Hills I will DIE on as someone who healed their anxious attachment…and become secure

hills I will die on as someone who healed their anxious attachment… Ever feel like your world falls apart when your partner pulls away? ⛈️ Like you’re overthinking texts, chasing reassurance, and stil...

28 Huhti 16min

130: you think your AVOIDANT is pulling away… but these 5 signs say he’s trying

Is your avoidant partner pulling away… or actually trying? here are CLEAR signs he IS trying (and he DOES want you.) If you have an anxious attachment style and you're constantly overthinking your ...

21 Huhti 21min

129: 3 signs your avoidant partner is becoming SECURE (even if they still pull away)

Ever wondered: do avoidants even care? Does he even love me if he pulls away? If you have an anxious attachment style, this episode will hit 🧠⛈️ Because it often feels like YOU are the only one tryin...

14 Huhti 18min

128: the UGLY truth why you attract avoidant people, men, friends (they mirror you!)

Grab here your SECURE WOMAN PROTOCOL to not freak out when he pulls away! If you keep ending up with emotionally unavailable partners… if you feel anxious when he pulls away, overthink every text, a...

7 Huhti 32min