Rebuilding Desire from Dating Days to Real Marriage Now

Rebuilding Desire from Dating Days to Real Marriage Now

After Monday’s incredible conversation with Russ Hudson, we’re diving into our January theme: Instincts & Intimacy. Today’s episode reveals how your dominant instinct (Self-Preservation, Social, or Sexual) often shows up differently when dating versus being married. We talk through not only how those differences may look, but how you can still try to find the healthiest and most achievable desires you're missing from those early honeymoon days. Break down each instinct’s dating “performance” versus marriage reality, plus how to work with (not against) your and your partner’s instinctual drives as you do so. Watch on YouTube! Don't forget! Use the special E + M Code Marriage100 for $100 the course ⁠here!⁠ https://russhudson.com/the-instincts-and-inner-work-building-practices-for-transforming-our-life-patterns/ Find ⁠Russ Hudson's books here!⁠ https://russhudson.com/books/ For more about Russ, visit https://russhudson.com/ Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.EnneagramandMarriage.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Christa's Best-Selling Book, The Enneagram in Marriage, here! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://a.co/d/df8SxVx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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When You're Too Weary for the Work, with Amy Wicks, 7

When You're Too Weary for the Work, with Amy Wicks, 7

So many this 2026 are bone-tired, pouring themselves out for everyone around them until there is nothing left, and then feeling guilty for having no energy left for the inner work they know matters, e...

31 Elo 43min

The Gift Your Marriage Never Knew It Needed: A Full You

The Gift Your Marriage Never Knew It Needed: A Full You

As we have named what our spouses cannot carry for us, now we turn the corner to the best gift your marriage never knew it needed, and it is not a date night or a new technique, it is a full you. If y...

26 Elo 20min

When Parenting Takes Everything, with Abbey Howe, 3

When Parenting Takes Everything, with Abbey Howe, 3

When the kids need everything, there is often very little left over for the marriage, and yet if our family is going to make it, fighting for it is your work to do. To this end, Christa welcomes Abbey...

24 Elo 43min

What Your Spouse Can and Can't Hold (Mind the Gap!)

What Your Spouse Can and Can't Hold (Mind the Gap!)

As we're talking about all month, every marriage has gaps and seasons where connection runs thin or a need goes unspoken for too long. As you're learning to healthily differentiate, don't move so far ...

19 Elo 21min

Grief, Remarriage, and the Love That Lasts, with Clarissa Moll, 6

Grief, Remarriage, and the Love That Lasts, with Clarissa Moll, 6

⁠⁠⁠This is a special and tender episode to close our month on what our spouses can and cannot carry for us, because some things, like grief, are simply too heavy for any one person to hold alone. Chri...

17 Elo 33min

Your Virtue, Your Vice, and Awakening to Your True Purposes

Your Virtue, Your Vice, and Awakening to Your True Purposes

So much of what we hand our spouse to fix is really our own inner work in disguise. In this episode, Christa turns to two of the most useful words the Enneagram gives us: your vice and your virtue. Yo...

12 Elo 22min

The Blind Spots Between Us, with Beatrice Chestnut, 2

The Blind Spots Between Us, with Beatrice Chestnut, 2

Christa welcomes the beloved Beatrice Chestnut, one of the most respected voices in the Enneagram world, for a rich conversation on the three centers of intelligence, the body, the heart, and the head...

10 Elo 53min

Where Our Deeper Needs Really Belong with Coach Linda Hannigan, 3

Where Our Deeper Needs Really Belong with Coach Linda Hannigan, 3

This week Christa welcomes Linda Hannigan, 3 (3-1 pairing), an Enneagram and Marriage certified coach, gifted orator, and truth teller whose candor and artistry make her a joy to learn from. Together ...

5 Elo 43min

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