The Assassin’s Blade: Novellas 1-3

Episode Title: The Assassin’s Blade – Novellas 1-3 (Sam Cortland, Skull’s Bay & an inner hip)

Description: The Romantasy Roundtable officially enters the Throne of Glass era! We are kicking off our journey into the Maasverse not with the first book, but with the prequel: The Assassin’s Blade by Sarah J. Maas. Amanda (the newbie), Kim (the veteran), and Rick (the obsessed) break down the first three novellas: The Assassin and the Pirate Lord, The Assassin and the Healer, and The Assassin and the Desert.

We discuss Celaena Sardothien’s 16-year-old audacity, why Sam Cortland gives off the energy of a finance bro you met on a Hinge date, and the group’s firm belief that Rolf the Pirate Lord is actually just a Muppet with magic hands. Expect debates on the anatomy of the "inner hip," questionable teaching methods involving knives, and why the desert is full of scorpions named Josh.

Key Topics Discussed:

Reading Order Debate: Why we chose to start with the prequel (Star Wars style) to get the heartbreak out of the way early—even if Rick thinks Yoda was just a puppet until Episode 2.

Sam Cortland vs. The World: We analyze Sam’s primal urge to be annoying, his "divorced dad" curtain-ripping energy, and why he feels like a guy who drinks IPAs for a living.

The Healer & The Barmaid: A deep dive into Yrene Towers, her brutal self-defense lessons from Celaena, and why "sink or swim" driving lessons in a Florida hailstorm are safer than Celaena's teaching style.

Desert Drama: Celaena heads to the Red Desert to train with the Silent Master, meets Ansel (and her betrayal), and learns that Stygian Spiders are basically just giant horses or "a million scorpions named Josh."

The Inner Hip: The crew tries to locate this elusive body part (Is it the groin? The string bikini line? An erogenous zone?) and why pinching it is the ultimate female friendship bonding moment.

Closing: Join us as we sprint through the desert and liberate slaves with style. Finish The Assassin’s Blade for next week—we have two more novellas to go before the emotional damage truly sets in!