Find Your Story - A Conversation with Maryam Pasha

In this episode of Force of Nature, Clover sits down with Maryam Pasha - master story-teller, Director of TEDxLondon, and the founder of XEquals. With a background in the human rights and charity sector, Maryam found her piece of the jigsaw helping people tell their stories, and give life to their ideas - especially those made to feel like imposters. In this conversation, Clover and Maryam discuss overcoming inner gremlins, the rise of armchair experts, the key to persuading anyone, and how to create a world where no one’s left behind.


Episode notes

01:36 - 07:30) Why society needs to hear new stories; how you’re made to feel like an imposter; and unzipping the identity “costumes” we hide behind.

07:30 - 15:00) Dismantling the meritocracy; mythology throughout human history; why we don’t have a progressive, cosmopolitan narrative that’s working; letting go of our projections onto others.

15:00 - 22:38 ) What happens when childhood dreams are pushed into the furnace of the industrial complex; the Hedonic treadmill of always wanting more; how the standardised education system enslaves us to the 9 - 5.

22:38 - 30:03 ) Learning to tell your story and embrace the sh*tty first draft; ending the pursuit of perfection; and embracing fear of failure.

30:03 - 37:40) Don’t listen to the armchair expert; befriending the inner gremlins that tell you you’re not good enough; unpacking your core destructive beliefs.

37:40 - 43:20) Making change starts with doing what you’re good at; be the drop of change that starts the tsunami; finding focus to change the big picture.

43:20 - 46:38) Climate change is the symptom of broken systems - there’s no climate justice without social justice; creating a world where no one’s left behind; is there such a thing as “too diverse”?

46:38 - 49:51) Dividing society into four categories, and how to speak to each; the difference between a campaigner and activist; and learning to influence people’s knowledge, attitudes and practice through TED.

49:51 - 57:04 ) The essential ingredients for persuasion; how to show up and be an ally; building your tribe and choosing who you surround yourself with.


Top quotes

“As a society, we need to hear new ideas and new stories from new storytellers because I think that's where we're going to find the solutions to the big problems that we're facing.” - Maryam

“I felt like such an outsider for so long because the stories that society told me were ones of not belonging. I embraced it as a survival technique. I think lots of people in alternative communities do this.” - Maryam

“Every single one of us is a drop. All the efforts we make are a drop. And we have no idea which drop is going to be the one that overflows, that changes the tide.” - Maryam

“It is the responsibility of men to stand for equality for women and to call out bad behavior. So too is it my responsibility as a CIS white woman to stand up for our people in the LGBTQ+ community. None of us can say, “It’s not my position, it’s not my role, it’s not my story” - it's part of the fabric of the society that we want to create.” - Clover

“When overwhelmed in the face of these big messy challenges, it's so easy to revert to tribal mentality and look back, rather than look forward, in the face of uncertainty.” - Clover


About the guest(s)

Maryam Pasha is a master story-teller, Director of TEDxLondon, and the founder of XEquals. She’s also the founder and lead curator for TEDxEastEnd - running 13 large and small TEDx events. With a background in the human rights and charity sector, Maryam found her piece of the jigsaw helping people tell their stories, and give life to their ideas - especially those made to feel like imposters. In this conversation, Clover and Maryam discuss overcoming inner gremlins,...