The Silent Struggle of Fathers in Adoption - Phil Kenward

In this episode of Adopt Perspective, Jo Sparrow speaks with Phil Kenwood, a father who shares his deeply personal story of losing a daughter to forced adoption in 1970. The conversation explores the emotional impact of adoption on fathers, the stigma surrounding men's mental health, and the importance of support groups. Phil discusses his journey of healing, the challenges of reconnecting with his daughter after many years, and the need for men to share their stories and seek help. The episode highlights the often unheard voices of fathers in the adoption narrative and emphasises the significance of empathy and support in the healing process.

This episode will resonate with adopted adults, parents who lost children to adoption, siblings, adoptive parents, practitioners, and anyone seeking a deeper, more honest understanding of the lifelong impacts of adoption.

Takeaways

• Jigsaw Queensland has launched a men's support group for those affected by forced adoption.
• Phil Kenwood emphasizes the stigma that prevents many fathers from sharing their experiences.
• The coercive nature of the adoption process in the past left lasting emotional scars.
• Phil's experience illustrates the profound impact of losing a child to adoption.
• The reunion with his daughter brought both joy and emotional turmoil for Phil.
• Phil's journey highlights the importance of mental health support for fathers.
• Yoga and therapy have been crucial in Phil's healing process.
• The need for men to openly discuss their grief and experiences is vital.
• Phil believes that just one supportive person could have changed many adoption outcomes.
• The episode aims to raise awareness about the emotional struggles faced by fathers in adoption.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Men's Mental Health and Support Groups

02:03 Phil Kenwood's Journey: A Father's Perspective on Adoption

10:35 The Impact of Forced Adoption on Lives

18:07 Reunion and Its Emotional Toll

21:13 Healing and Support: Finding Peace

27:46 The Unheard Stories of Fathers in Adoption

"If just one person had been supportive..."

"I suffered from anxiety for years."

"Men need to talk and not hold onto grief."

🎧 If this conversation resonates, subscribe for more honest discussions about adoption, identity and the lived experience of adopted adults, mothers and fathers who lost children to adoption and therapists, researchers and policy makers in this space.

This episode discusses adult themes and listener discretion is advised. For more information go to ⁠http://www.jigsawqueensland.com/podcast⁠

To be considered for interview on the podcast, fill in the prospective guest form you'll find on the podcast page of the website.

Your host is Dr Jo-Ann Sparrow - President of Jigsaw Queensland (⁠www.jigsawqueensland.com⁠)

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If you are looking for support and reside in Queensland, Australia, you can reach Jigsaw Queensland's Forced Adoption Support Service on toll-free 1800 21 03 13, or you can call Jigsaw on 07 3358 6666. If you live in another state of Australia, you can still call the Forced Adoption Support Service in the state that you're calling from. In every other state of Australia, Relationships Australia operates this service.

A big thank you to Matt Sparrow for composing and recording our original theme music.

We acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we work and the many lands that our clients now live on and we wish to acknowledge and show our respects to Elders past and present for their continuing connection to culture and the contributions they make to community. We acknowledge how much we have to learn from them and their unique understanding of connection and adoption and their recognition that at the base of every change is truth telling and healing.