Everything In Conversation: Friendship Vs. Motherhood

Happy Hump day EICrunchies! So last week an Instagram post by a child-free creator went semi-viral. The post explored the perspective of its child-free creator (Danni Duncan) and many other child-free people who have felt sad when a friendship has changed following a mate having a baby, and want spaces to express that freely. In the visuals for the post she writes:

"I know your kids come first but I still believe friendship should go both ways so that makes me selfish. I understand you’re busy but I still hope to hear from you, so that makes me needy. I don’t expect the same time as before but I do hope for some effort, so that makes me unrealistic. I miss our friendship and I’ll say that out loud, so that makes me difficult. Or maybe I’m not a horrible friend. Maybe I just believe friendship should survive life changes. And that both people deserve to be seen.”

And we wanted to discuss this- with your help. We ask: is it fair for CF women to express their sadness when a friend has a baby? Is it on mothers to cross the divide or should those of us without kids do the heavy lifting? Are some friendships just seasonal? And where on EARTH are the dads in all this?

Thank you all SO much for your takes on this- as empathetic, thoughtful and considered as ever. We luuuuurve being in conversation with you all. O, R, B x

Links:

Danni's post

Danni's follow up post

Waterstones - Lessons from a Default Parent by Lou Beckett

Psychology Today - The Ring Theory

Book recs from listeners:

Ghosts by Dolly Alderton

So Thrilled For You by Holly Bourne

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