Why Couples Get Bored In Bed And How To Fix It | Ep. 157 (Part 2)

What do you do when the relationship is good, but the sex is boring?

In part two of my conversation with clinical sexologist Dr. Stacey Friedman, we talk about what really happens to sexual relationships over time. We move beyond the idea of “dead bedrooms” and dive into boredom, communication, novelty, and the evolving nature of intimacy in midlife.

We explore how to talk to a partner about disappointing sex without damaging their ego. Dr. Stacey Friedman explains why many couples lose desire simply because their sex life becomes predictable. And she shares practical ways to bring novelty back into the bedroom without pressure or shame.

The conversation also explores topics many couples are curious about but rarely discuss openly. Alternative relationship structures, sexual exploration later in life, and how to redefine sex as connection rather than performance.

If part one opened the door to rebuilding intimacy, part two shows how curiosity, communication, and creativity keep desire alive long term.

In this episode:

00:00 Welcome Back And Part Two Overview

00:35 Karen’s Story About The “Lazy Lover”

02:05 How To Talk About Bad Sex Without Hurting Ego

03:30 Curiosity Instead Of Criticism

04:40 Why So Many Couples Are Bored In Bed

05:45 The Importance Of Novelty In Long Term Sex

06:55 The Roller Coaster Analogy For Predictable Sex

08:00 Simple Ways To Add Variety And Playfulness

09:05 When Couples Consider Opening Their Relationship

10:30 Why Alternative Relationships Sometimes Work

11:55 Ad Break. Lem By Hello Nancy

12:55 A Real Example Of A Couple Who Opened Their Relationship

13:45 Navigating Midlife Changes In Sex And Desire

14:40 The Daily Question That Strengthens Relationships

15:25 Dr. Stacey’s Definition Of Sex

15:55 Best Orgasm And Sexual Exploration

16:15 Final Advice. Curiosity Keeps Desire Alive

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out!

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Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: karen@taboototruth.com

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

About the Guest:

Dr. Stacy Friedman is a Clinical Sexologist, certified intimacy coach, and the unapologetically fierce voice behind The Purple Passion Project podcast. With decades in medicine and sexuality work, she helps people awaken desire, reclaim pleasure, and ignite passion through coaching, curated pleasure essentials, and provocative e-books. Known for making sex talk feel like your most daring friend, she turns taboo into tantalizing—zero shame, all heat. Dr.Stacy's motto: My passion is to help you create yours.

Connect with Dr. Stacy Friedman:

Website: https://drstacyfriedman.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drstacyfriedman

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-purple-passion-project/id1825458840

Tease me, touch me, Talk To Me:

https://e.drstacyfriedman.com/product-details/product/6960f9e9612364ee5873c8c9

Reigniting passion in Long-Term Relationships:

https://e.drstacyfriedman.com/product-details/product/69419a1f19a5c70271d8df18

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: karen@taboototruth.com

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com

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