Ep.32: The Invisible Wound of Adoption: A Therapist's Personal Adoptee Journey with Selina Beenen, LCSW

In this deeply personal and moving episode, Lizzie and Dr. Patty sit down with Selina Beenen, LCSW to hear her story of being adopted as an infant and how that experience shaped her life, her sense of self, and her calling to become a therapist.

Selina shares what it was like to grow up knowing she was adopted but never being allowed to talk about it. She describes the confusion, the abandonment, the unspoken loyalty to her adoptive mother, and the question that lived underneath everything: Was I wanted? She opens up about the grief of not knowing where she came from, the fear of rejection that kept her from searching for her biological family, and the Christmas morning in 2018 when her four sons gave her an Ancestry DNA kit, a gift that would change everything.

This episode is raw, tender, and full of hope. The journey of adoptee identity integration, healing, and belonging is still unfolding for Selina, tune for this heart-centered honest conversation.

In This Episode We Explore:

• The unspoken rule: Why talking about adoption felt like a betrayal to her adoptive mother
• How adopted children become emotional caretakers, protecting their parents' feelings instead of their own
• The invisible wound: "Was I wanted? Why was I given up?"
• Why adoptees often don't search for biological family
• The grief and confusion adoptees carry even in loving adoptive families
• How normal childhood discipline triggered deeper feelings of abandonment and rejection
• The overwhelming mix of joy, fear, grief, and belonging that comes with reunion with biological family

Links & Resources

→ Beenen Therapy Group: www.beenentherapygroup.com

→ Follow on social media: @BeenenTherapyGroup @SacredTreehouse

→ Sacred Treehouse programs: www.sacredtreehouse.org

Look Forward to Part 2

In a future episode, Selina will share clinical insights for adoptive parents and what helps adopted individuals integrate their identity and heal.

If this episode moved you, please share it with an adoptee who feels alone, an adoptive parent seeking understanding, or anyone navigating the complexity of identity, belonging, and family. Leave a review to help us reach more people who need to know: healing is possible.