EP325 - Rising to the Occasion: The Pros and Cons of Erectile Dysfunction Medicines

Welcome to episode 19 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is Laurie Watson, LMFT. In this episode we talk about how you can get the spark back, and the importance of understanding different sex drives and ways to address them. Laurie is a certified sex therapist who has twenty-five years of experience working with couples and individuals about love and sex. Laurie says, “I’ve never seen a couple who I didn’t feel hope about their healing and happiness. The difficulty is convincing them to give up the idea that only their partner will have to change!” She authored her first book Wanting Sex Again – How to Rediscover Desire and Heal a Sexless Marriage (Penguin) in December 2012. A popular blogger for the general public with over 1.6 million reads on Psychology Today Online in Married and Still Doing It, Laurie also lectures professionals at Duke’s and UNC Chapel Hill’s medical schools on sexual function and dysfunction. Featured in her hometown in the N&O, Laurie has also been published or quoted in most every nationally popular magazine like Glamour, Women’s Health, Men’s Health, Cosmopolitan, etc. A popular media figure, she has appeared on the Katie Couric Show and is regularly on radio and television in Raleigh and Greensboro. Director/owner of Awakenings, Center for Intimacy and Sexuality, Laurie supervises 6 clinicians in both Raleigh and Greensboro. She’s a member of St. Michael’s Episcopal Church, has been married for 30 years and has three grown sons. In this episode, you will hear: How important sex is, in a marriage What are some of the causes of a sexless marriage How couples can develop a power struggle in a relationship through a sexless marriage Ways in which in couples can reconnect The different sexual dynamics between a man and a woman that can lead to a sexless marriage Understanding each other’s sex drives, what works and doesn’t work in the bedroom The need for women to have clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, only 15% of women reach orgasm without clitoral stimulation How couples can get stuck in a loop of not having sex Overcoming the stresses of modern life, work, kids etc to have a healthy sex life The different reasons why men and women will withdraw from sex   Resources http://awakeningscenter.org http://awakeningscenter.org/test-sign-up Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

16 Touko 201742min

Welcome to episode 18 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is Dr. Debra Mollen. In this show she discusses women’s reproductive rights, the myths and misconceptions around abortion and the consequences of limiting reproductive rights; e.g. DIY abortions. Debra Mollen is a psychologist, Professor, and Director of the Counseling Psychology Master’s Program at Texas Woman's University in Denton, Texas. She has published scholarship on women’s sexuality, multiculturalism, reproductive justice, and professional development in various academic journals. Debra is a recognized as a Certified Sexuality Educator by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists and was the 2016 recipient of the Distinguished Graduate Faculty Award from her university. She is a Co-Chair for the Revision of the American Psychological Association Guidelines for the Psychological Practice with Girls and Women and past-Chairperson of the Division 17 (Counseling Psychology) Section for the Advancement of Women Her specialties include: Multicultural awareness and diversity training, training and professional identity, sexuality education, childfree women, feminist theory and therapy In this episode, you will hear:   The rights women have when it comes to reproduction The myths and misconceptions around abortion How women can feel a sense of alienation and hopelessness when confronted with abortion How there isn’t any recognizable science or data for “Post Traumatic Abortion Syndrome” The ways in which our culture can pressure women into motherhood How our modern society can romanticize having children How limiting women’s reproductive rights could influence their sexuality Consequences of limiting reproductive rights; DIY abortions. Knock on effects: trauma, anxiety, and depression How legislators are chipping away at women’s reproductive rights Ways in which to counteract the legislators The need for good quality education and information on this issue  For more great content check out www.sexologypodcast.com   Resources http://www.worldsexology.org/resources dmollen@mail.twu.edu http://www.worldsexology.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/declaration_of_sexual_rights_sep03_2014.pdf https://www.prochoiceamerica.org/ https://www.guttmacher.org/ http://www.siecus.org/ https://www.aasect.org/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

9 Touko 201731min

Welcome to episode 17 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is Dr. Lisa Firestone. In this episode, Dr. Firestone talks about the definition of a “Fantasy Bond”, childhood experiences that can affect your sexuality and the need for self-compassion around these issues.  Dr. Lisa Firestone is the Director of Research and Education at The Glendon Association. An accomplished and much requested lecturer, Dr. Firestone speaks at national and international conferences in the areas of couple relations, parenting, and suicide and violence prevention. Dr. Firestone has published numerous professional articles, and most recently was the co-author of Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships (APA Books, 2006), Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice (New Harbinger, 2002), Creating a Life of Meaning and Compassion: The Wisdom of Psychotherapy (APA Books, 2003) and The Self Under Siege (Routledge, 2012). In this episode, you will hear:   The definition of a “Fantasy Bond” How common it is for people to experience the Fantasy Bond Repeating destructive behaviours throughout different relationships Being able to experience healthy sexuality without acting out from your past Childhood experiences that can affect your sexuality Identifying if you’re reacting in a fantasy bond as opposed to reacting authentically The need for some people to have certain fantasies to be aroused The importance of being vulnerable with your partner in a relationship Overcoming the shame that not being vulnerable can create Why both partners in a relationship need to be authentic with each other Voice Therapy – How it works and its similarities to Narrative Therapy The need for self-compassion and not be too self-critical  Resources https://www.psychalive.org https://www.sexologypodcast.com lfirestone@glendon.org http://drlisafirestone.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

2 Touko 201731min

Welcome to episode 16 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is the creator of Talk Sex with Me, Tara Spears, LMFT, LMHC. In this episode, Tara talks about ways in which parents can support their children through the journey of sexual discovery, how to navigate the situation of your children discovering pornography and clarifying and communicating your own sexual values to your child. Talk Sex with Me was created by Tara Spears. Ms. Spears graduated with a Master’s Degree in Counselor Education from the University of Central Florida in 2005. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Sex Therapist. She has over ten years of experience working with individuals, children, families and couples encountering a variety of hardships in life. After spending, most of her career responding reactively to situations or intervening after a crisis (i.e. a child’s removal from the home, failed adoption, and the aftermath of abuse), Ms. Spears decided to take a more proactive approach. In this episode, you will hear: How Tara became involved in this line of work The appropriate age for parents to start talking about sex with their children Why parents shouldn’t over-react if they find their children masturbating Ways in which parents can support their children through the journey of sexual discovery Clarifying your own sexual values Communicating those values to your child Knowing the distinction between sexual education and “putting sexual ideas” into your child’s mind How to navigate the situation of your children discovering pornography Making sure pornography doesn’t set their expectation for sex Communicating to younger children if they walk in on their parents having sex The best ways to react if your child becomes pregnant or impregnates someone else Negative connotations in school sex education and how to navigate around this issue For more great content please check out www.sexologypodcast.com   Resources https://talksexwithme.com talksexwme@gmail.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

25 Huhti 201731min

Welcome to episode 15 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is sociologist and sexologist Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus. In this episode, you will hear Dr. Gunsaullus talk about the normality of masturbation and how often people engage in it, positive effects from masturbation and ways in which parents can positively communicate with their children about masturbation. Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, sociologist and sexologist, is a frequent speaker about sexual empowerment, healthy relationships, body image, erotic play, sexual consent, sexual health, and mindfulness. She has presented two TEDx Talks, is a writer on sex and relationships, and a recurring intimacy expert on the San Diego morning news. Her In the Den with Dr. Jenn educational video series has over 1.3 million hits on YouTube and she is an expert in the new documentary on masturbation, called Sticky: A (Self) Love Story. In addition, as a martial arts practitioner, she was recently promoted to black belt in Korean karate -- so watch out for this badass doctor! In this episode, you will hear:   The normality of masturbation and how often people do it How it’s normal for children to discover masturbation General concerns people have, is it harmful? How cultural and religious beliefs have negatively impacted people’s views on masturbation Misinformation – No, you can’t go blind from masturbation Positive effects from masturbation, mentally and physically Overcoming shame and embarrassment with meditative masturbation Masturbating in a relationship, does it hurt the relationship? Having open communication with your partner on this issue The psychological effects using toys and vibrators can have Ways in which parents can positively communicate with their children about masturbation How many of our currently held cultural views of masturbation were created in the 19th and 20th century For more great content check out www.sexologypodcast.com  Resources http://www.drjennsden.com http://www.drjennsden.com/meditative-masturbation Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

18 Huhti 201734min

Sexology Podcast EP14 - Sexual Empowerment with Dr. Patti Britton   Welcome to episode 14 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is Clinical Sexologist and Sexuality Educator, Dr. Patti Britton. In this episode, Dr. Britton talks about what sexual empowerment entails, how shaming yourself is one of the biggest blocks to sexual pleasure and becoming more authentic and cultivating erotic authenticity.   With over 35 years of experience and pedigreed credentials as a Clinical Sexologist and Sexuality Educator, Dr. Patti Britton has built a reputation as a pioneer of sex coaching. Her methodologies for helping individuals and couples achieve their desired sexual potential are well known among professionals in her industry. As co-founder of SexCoachU, she has trained hundreds of sex coaches throughout the world, spreading her groundbreaking approach to sexual healing. Dr. Patti’s work has been featured on national TV programs, such as The Montel Show, Hard Copy, CNBC, and CBS News. She raised the bar in her field when she published the first book on Sex Coaching, entitled ‘The Art of Sex Coaching: Expanding Your Practice’.   While her methods and unique approach have developed into training other sex coaches, Dr. Patti’s true passion lies in working with individuals and couples to achieve their sexual goals. Whether it’s a desire to heal sexual dysfunction, overcome shame, or deepen an intimate connection, Dr. Patti is at right at home with finding the solution.   In this episode, you will hear:   What sexual empowerment usually entails Sexual actualisation and realisation and the right to feel pleasure Some of the factors that lead to people losing their sexual power and desire How shaming yourself is one of the biggest blocks to sexual pleasure Ways in which to refresh your sex life Clarifying your views around sexuality SAR – Sexual Attitude Reassessment and Restructuring Allowing yourself to enjoy sexual pleasure and masturbation Navigating your value system with your sexual desires Becoming more authentic and cultivating erotic authenticity How things have changed since the release of Fifty Shades of Grey   Resources http://drpattibritton.com http://drpattibritton.com/free-gift-for-her-pleasure/   For more great content please check out www.sexologyposcast.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

11 Huhti 201730min

Welcome to episode 13 of the Sexology Podcast, today my guest is sex and relationship coach; Pam Costa. In this episode, Pam talks about how she began her journey into educating people about sexuality, the ways in which shame can shape our sexuality and how you can build shame resiliency. After a decade and a half at Apple and Facebook, Pam left her career in high tech to found Down To There to share her real-life stories of challenges and successes around sexuality in her marriage. She hopes that her journey from struggling with sexual desire to a now rich and rewarding sex life can provide an example of how normal issues with desire can be, and how these issues can provide unexpected pathways for increased intimacy and connection. As a Somatica® sex and relationship coach, she enjoys working with individuals and couples of all configurations to explore what is possible emotionally and erotically in their relationships. She is currently accepting and seeing clients over Skype and in-person in her office in Cupertino, CA. She also provides content and guidance for Down To There Circles: free, peer-led discussion groups, where friends can support and inspire each other around sex and relationships. Her ongoing studies include training with San Francisco Sex Information (SFSI), American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT), California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (CAMFT), JFK University's holistic counseling program and the Somatica® Institute. Her writing has been featured on Huffington Post, Mindful and Psyched and she has also spoken at the Wisdom 2.0 and Inman conferences. In this episode, you will hear: How Pam began her journey into educating people about sexuality The ways in which shame can shape our sexuality Body shaming; and how it can affect sex The difficulties in communicating what you want sexually, leading to vulnerability How poor sex education can lead to shaming Not having enough information on sex from our parents The affects religion can have on sex and correct information around sex Mixed messages that children can pick up from their parents about sex Identifying your own shame and figuring out where it came from Being scared to share your shame with your partner Building shame resiliency How shame can affect other things outside of sex; eating disorders, addictions etc. Communicating with your close friends about shame   Resources https://www.downtothere.com For more great content please check out www.sexologypodcast.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

4 Huhti 201736min

Welcome to episode 12 of the Sexology Podcast, today I’m speaking to Natalie Finegood Goldberg, LMFT, CST about the issues surrounding erectile dysfunction. In this episode, Natalie talks about the causes of erectile dysfunction, its physiological and psychological factors contributing to this struggles and steps that can be taken to overcome this issue. Natalie Finegood Goldberg is an AASECT Certified Los Angeles Sex Therapist and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFC #53017) specializing in sex therapy and psychotherapy. Working with individuals and couples, Natalie offers therapy services at her private practice in Beverly Hills. Previous work experience includes being a staff clinical associate at Center for Healthy Sex in West Los Angeles, as well as having previously worked at Cliffside Malibu, a dual diagnosis inpatient drug and alcohol rehab. Natalie was born and raised in Los Angeles and is familiar with the variety of pressures that come with living in LA.  In addition to her degrees, Natalie has participated in a variety of trainings including a Clinical Sexology training with Dr. Patti Britton, Bridging the Couple Chasm: A Research Based Approach by Drs John and Julie Gottman, and the Sex Addiction Treatment Training Program with Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S. Natalie completed the rigorous requirements to become a sex therapist through the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) under the supervision of Alexandra Katehakis, MFT, CSAT-S, CST-S and Dr Tammy Nelson, CST-S. Natalie is trained in EMDR Therapy with advanced training in AF-EMDR (Attachment Focused EMDR) with Dr Laurel Parnell.  In this episode, you will hear: The physical and psychological reasons why erections occur How as men get older they need a mixture of physical and psychological stimulation to get an erection The criteria that needs to be met to be diagnosed with erectile dysfunction How erectile dysfunction is related to all sexual activity, not just for example masturbation The physiological and psychological causes of erectile dysfunction Why men prefer the problem to be physiological How taking Viagra can make things worse if the problem is psychological The effects anxiety can have in relation to erectile dysfunction The impact erectile dysfunction can have on couples / relationships How masturbation and pornography can affect erectile dysfunction Available treatments both medically and psychologically The average time treatments can take The additional benefits mindfulness can bring The importance of communication to help overcome this issue Ways you can regain your sexual energy Understanding that erectile dysfunction is a multi-layered issue that needs ongoing support     Resources http://www.creatingchangela.com natalie@creatingchangela.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

28 Maalis 201733min