How to Stop Fighting Anxiety with ADHD & Still Function

You've thought about it. Maybe more than once. What would actually happen if you let go of the push? Not because you don't want to stop hustling, but because some part of you is terrified of what happens if you do. If your nervous system has spent years equating anxiety with getting things done, releasing it doesn't feel like relief. It feels like free-falling.

In this episode, I get honest about what it's actually looked like for me to stop relying on anxiety to fuel my ADHD brain and my business, and what showed up in its place. We get into nervous system regulation, the difference between calm and resilience, and the quiet way chronic anxiety and burnout erode executive function over time without you noticing until it's bad. I also talk about where unresolved trauma fits into all of this, because for some of us, calm doesn't register as safety. It registers as a threat.

There's a specific moment I describe where I caught myself mid-relapse into a pattern I thought I'd already healed. What I noticed about my own body in that moment is the part I almost didn't share, and it's the piece that changed how I think about recovery. It might change how you think about yours too.

— The body cue that tells you you're forcing it, often before your brain catches up

— Why calm can feel more threatening than anxiety if you carry certain histories

— The real reason your best work rarely happens under pressure, even when it gets done

— The five things that quietly decide whether this shift is easy or hard for you

PODCAST PAUSE ANNOUNCEMENT

As mentioned in this episode, I am pausing my podcast so I can direct tine and energy towards birthing what comes next and creating by moving at the pace of my soul and in alignment with my Self and my intuition.

You can stay in touch three ways:

1. Subscribe to my YouTube channel (https://www.youtube.com/@Jenbarnes) where there’s great ADHD content and something new I’m creating around ADHD and money.
2. Join my email club for ADHD women to get weekly-ish insights on ADHD. I almost always share an action step whether it is something to try, a new practice, or something to reflect on or journal about. Join here: https://jenbarnes.kit.com/email-club
3. Follow me on Substack where I write about matriarchy, the Divine Feminine, and Spirituality

If you missed it, watch the Rewire the Worry series here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7JSZUiV8OFHl3wyaekJjOzI5CLTPrjQT

—CHAPTERS—

00:00 Why Letting Go Feels So Dangerous

01:00 Picking Up Where We Left Off

02:09 What Resilience Actually Looks Like

05:17 The Cycle I Thought I'd Already Broken

07:56 The Body Signal Most Of Us Miss

10:56 Why Rest Doesn't Feel Restful Anymore

13:32 What Actually Needs To Happen Today

16:11 The Pace That Scares Me Most

24:08 Letting Good Enough Win

27:19 The Five Things That Decide How This Goes

30:44 What Actually Calms A Nervous System

35:34 When Calm Feels Unsafe

37:10 Where This Goes From Here

✨ If you found this episode helpful… Please follow, subscribe, and share it with another ADHD woman who needs support!

💛 Connect with me on social media!

Youtube: @Jenbarnes

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenbarneslicsw/

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal health or medical advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice or psychotherapy.

If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency please contact emergency services in your area. If you are in the USA, dial 988 for the Suicide and Crisis line or 911 for a medical emergency.