The Biggest Lie We've Been Told About Women's Desire: Why Comparing Female Sexuality to Male Sexuality has Left Generations of Women Feeling Inadequate.

Why do so many women believe they're broken when it comes to desire?

In this episode we explore one of the most misunderstood aspects of female sexuality: the difference between spontaneous and responsive desire. Drawing on contemporary sexology, neuroscience, nervous system science and embodiment, join me as I unpack why so many women have spent years measuring themselves against a model of sexuality that was never designed to reflect the female body.

Together, we'll explore the role of emotional labour, stress, safety, relationships and context in shaping desire, why libido isn't something we can force, and how learning to listen to the wisdom of the body can transform not only our intimate relationships but our relationship with ourselves.

If you've ever wondered, "What's wrong with me?" this conversation offers a compassionate and evidence-informed invitation to ask a very different question.

Topics explored include: responsive desire, spontaneous desire, female libido, neuroscience, nervous system regulation, emotional labour, relationship dynamics, embodiment, sexuality, intimacy and human flourishing.

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VILATES

•Website: https://www.vilates.com/ •Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vilates_/ •Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3fs2KlkHNzICKAg2crZSMB •Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ecology-of-intimacy-podcast/id1772602980 === . . . . . .

Disclaimer This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, medical practitioner, professional coach, psychotherapist, or any other qualified professional. We shall in no event be held liable to any party for any reason arising directly or indirectly for the use or interpretation of the information presented in this podcast. Copyright 2026 © Vilates, Pty. Ltd - All rights reserved.