The 20-Week Scan That Changed Everything: TFMR, Baby Loss & Finding Hope Again

You go into a routine 20-week pregnancy scan expecting to see your baby.

You don’t expect to walk out knowing your entire future has just changed.

This week on Becoming Lucy, Lianne shares an incredibly personal story about TFMR (termination for medical reasons), pregnancy loss, grief and what happens when one devastating loss becomes part of a journey no family could ever have prepared for.

Already a mum of two, Lianne and her husband knew they wanted one more baby. Her pregnancy appeared to be progressing normally — until the 20-week scan revealed serious medical complications.

Suddenly, they were faced with conversations and decisions no parent ever imagines having to make.

Their baby was desperately wanted. Already loved. Already part of their family.

And the decision that followed was made because of that love.

Lianne takes us through receiving the diagnosis, navigating termination for medical reasons, going through labour and meeting and saying goodbye to her baby, Eden.

But Lianne’s story didn’t end there.

She and her husband found the courage to try again — only to be confronted by more devastating loss.

And then, again.

We talk about the cumulative reality of repeated baby loss: what it does to your mental health, your relationship, your trust in your own body and your ability to believe that another pregnancy might actually end differently.

Lianne speaks candidly about TFMR, miscarriage and pregnancy after loss, as well as continuing to be a mum to the children who still needed her while carrying enormous grief herself.

We also explore the parts that aren’t always talked about: the physical reality of labour and postpartum after loss, moments of compassion — and painful miscommunication — within medical care, explaining loss to children, remembering the babies who aren’t here, and the importance of finding the right baby loss support.

And eventually, we talk about hope.

About trying again when pregnancy has stopped feeling exciting and started feeling frightening. About Lianne’s journey towards her rainbow baby. And about discovering that finding happiness again doesn’t mean forgetting the babies who came before.

This isn’t simply a conversation about ending a pregnancy.

It’s about wanted babies, impossible decisions, motherhood, grief, love and resilience — and why the realities of TFMR and baby loss deserve to be spoken about.

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🎧 IN THIS EPISODE

• The routine 20-week scan that changed everything

• What TFMR — termination for medical reasons — can really involve

• Making an impossible decision for a desperately wanted baby

• Labour, birth and saying goodbye to Eden

• Experiencing repeated pregnancy and baby loss

• Miscarriage and the emotional impact of trying again

• How baby loss can affect mental health and relationships

• Parenting other children while grieving

• The importance of compassionate medical care

• Pregnancy after loss and the fear that can come with it

• Remembering and honouring babies after loss

• Lianne’s journey towards her rainbow baby and finding hope again

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💛 CONNECT WITH LIANNE

Lianne has kindly said that she is open to hearing from anyone who has been affected by similar experiences or feels they would like to reach out.

Lianne’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/barreandbloomuk?stkn=c3lkNmY1dW82b3Rv

🫶 SUPPORT & RESOURCES

If you have been affected by TFMR, miscarriage, pregnancy loss or baby loss, you don’t have to navigate it alone.

Petals – The Baby Loss Counselling Charity

Specialist counselling and support following pregnancy or baby loss.

https://www.petalscharity.org/

Tommy’s – Baby Loss Information & Support

Information and support around miscarriage, TFMR, stillbirth, neonatal loss, mental health and pregnancy after loss.

https://www.tommys.org/baby-loss-support

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⚠️ CONTENT NOTE

This episode contains detailed and emotional discussion of pregnancy loss, miscarriage, fetal abnormalities, TFMR (termination for medical reasons), labour and birth, baby loss, grief and mental health. Some listeners may find these topics distressing, so please listen with care.

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⚠️ Podcast Disclaimer

• Informational Only: This content is for general information and entertainment. It is not professional advice (legal, medical, financial, or otherwise).

• No Guarantees: We do not guarantee the accuracy, completeness, or outcomes from using the information shared.

• Personal Views: Opinions expressed are those of the hosts and guests and do not reflect the official positions of any affiliated organisations.

• No Liability: We are not liable for any actions taken based on this podcast.

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