When your Job Becomes your Identity - Rachael Stark

153 - When your Job Becomes your Identity - Rachael Stark

What happens when you're performing well at work—but you're not actually doing well?

Rachael Stark knows that tension firsthand.

Rachael is a captain in the Army National Guard, a reserve police officer, works in policy and accreditation for a police department, and previously served as a forensic death investigator. On paper, she was successful, productive, and helping people. But underneath it all, work had slowly become her identity.

She was thinking about work constantly. Dreaming about it. Carrying scenes home with her. And like many first responders, she convinced herself it was simply part of the job.

In this episode of the First Responder Wellness Podcast, Rachael joins Conrad Weaver for an honest conversation about what wellness looks like before someone reaches a crisis point.

They discuss the danger of confusing productivity with health, why first responders can become addicted to being needed, and how seemingly small practices—therapy, hobbies, exercise, friendships, creative outlets, and simply creating space to decompress—can help someone remain a whole person.

They also dig into the responsibility of leadership.

It's not enough for an agency to put an EAP number on the wall. Leaders have to model the behaviors they want their people to embrace. That means checking in, listening, creating psychological safety, acknowledging that difficult calls affect us, and demonstrating that seeking support isn't a sign of weakness.

In this episode:

• Why being high-functioning doesn't necessarily mean you're healthy

• What happens when the job becomes your entire identity

• The warning signs Rachael initially dismissed

• Why she unexpectedly picked up the violin

• The difference between having wellness resources and creating a wellness culture

• Why leaders need to model healthy behavior

• How supervisors can build trust with their people

• A better way to check in than simply asking, "How are you?"

• Why staying constantly busy can become a form of avoidance

• The individual's responsibility for proactive wellness

• How small changes can help first responders remain whole

• Why Rachael believes "wellness is not weakness"

Rachael's message to leaders is simple: If you want a team that's ready for the next emergency, you need people who feel safe in their environment, safe enough to be honest, and connected to an identity beyond the job.

And for the first responder who isn't in crisis but knows something isn't quite right—you don't necessarily need to completely change your life.

Sometimes you simply need to start making room for one outside the job.

Connect with Rachael: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rachael-stark-ab14b21a7/

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