Self Respect

In this episode, host, sex educator and therapist Melanie Ramey talks about self-respect: what it means and how to nurture it. Self-respect is a key component in our sexuality and in having sex with partners. But what exactly does having self-respect look like? And what kind of values does it align with? Melanie breaks down the fundamental nature of self-respect and explores how it affects sex, intimacy, and relationships.

There are four main red flags that indicate a person likely lacks self-respect. Melanie identifies them as, 1) Over-apologizing, 2) Fear of expressing opinions, 3) Constant self-deprecation, and 4) Tolerating disrespect. If we see ourselves in these examples, Melanie counsels us not to despair and outlines how to develop self-respect. She offers poignant examples of the sorts of values that self-respect aligns with, such as compassion, commitment, and generosity. She also defines the difference between self esteem and self-respect. Often they are used interchangeably but they speak to quite different things. This episode provides guidance for examining how much self-respect we have and how to ensure it is involved in our sexual partnerships and our lives.

Resources discussed in this episode:

• “Aretha: From These Roots” by Aretha Franklin and David Ritz

Desiderata

Go placidly amidst the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble, it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all ardity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and stars, you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.
With all its drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

By Max Ehrmann, 1927

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Contact Melanie Ramey:

• Instagram: @SexuallySpeakingWithMelanie
• Facebook: Sexually Speaking with Melanie Ramey
• Linkedin: Sexually Speaking with Melanie Ramey

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Canon in D Major performed by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

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