Learning Nonviolent Communication with Oren Jay Sofer

Learning Nonviolent Communication with Oren Jay Sofer

So much of our happiness and well-being comes back to how effectively we’re able to communicate with others – particularly in our important relationships. But how often are we our best selves? Are we able to hear others and speak our mind in a clear and kind way, without either becoming defensive or being excessively punishing and prosecutorial? To help us learn how to do just that, Forrest and Dr. Hanson are joined today by Oren Jay Sofer, the author of Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. Learn more about Say What You Mean here Oren's website Timestamps: 1:38: What is Nonviolent Communication? 5:12: The true nature of Nonviolent Communication. 9:25: How this style of communication changes us. 15:08: Why should we communicate this way when other people don't? 20:26: How can we make demands of other people nonviolently? 32:13: If others don't communicate with us in good faith, should we still be nonviolent? 37:32: Lessons for your younger self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ep. 12: Finding What You Really Need

Ep. 12: Finding What You Really Need

On today’s episode of the Being Well podcast, Dr. Hanson and Forrest talk about how we can find and use “key resource experiences” – experiences that we can match to our unique vulnerabilities in order to grow the strengths we need the most. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Timestamps: 0:45: What is a key resource experience? 1:45: What would be useful in dealing with your issues? 2:30: How to identify your key resources. 4:00: What were the times when you were at your best? 5:15: Identifying the vulnerabilities we match key resources to. 7:40: How do our vulnerabilities relate to our needs? 10:50: Matching key resources to specific needs. 11:15: Resources for anxiety, anger, and helplessness. 13:45: Feeling alright, right now. 15:35: Resources for satisfaction. 18:45: The importance of resourcefulness. 19:30: Resources for connection. 21:05: Means vs. Ends 27:25: Recap Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

27 Maalis 201829min

Ep. 11: Make Your Learning Last

Ep. 11: Make Your Learning Last

How can we help the brain "absorb" the things we want it to hold on to? Dr. Rick Hanson explores the “installation” stage of learning in detail, including how we can internalize the various positive aspects of any experience to grow the strengths we need the most. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:50: What attracted you to “learning”? 3:15: The “dirty secret” of the personal growth professions. 5:05: The five ways we can enrich our experience. 8:10: Multimodality: how to learn through the different aspects of experience. 9:00: Why writing affirmations rarely works. 9:55: Bridging the gap between thought and experience. 13:30: Our many opportunities for learning. 14:30: How to make our experiences feel novel. 16:40: How to make our experiences feel relevant. 18:20: How to absorb experiences. 19:50: Letting experiences into our body. 24:10: Changing our relationship to experiences 25:30: The power of “retroactive rehearsal.” 28:00: The foundation of learning. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 Maalis 201831min

Ep. 10: H.E.A.L. Yourself

Ep. 10: H.E.A.L. Yourself

HOW can we grow the positive traits we want more of inside ourselves? On this episode Dr. Hanson explains the HEAL process that allows us to learn from our experiences more effectively. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:40: Why is learning an inner strength? 2:40: The superpower of superpowers 5:35: What does emotional learning FEEL like? 7:50: An example of learning that sticks 10:05: What’s happening in the brain when we’re learning? 13:05: Using the mind to change the brain. 14:55: The opportunity in every day. 16:55: The stages of the learning process. 19:05: The importance of installation. 20:10: The H.E.A.L. process of learning 23:05: The feeling of enriching and absorbing 23:45: Linking 25:30: Summary Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Maalis 201826min

Ep. 9: Respond, Don't React

Ep. 9: Respond, Don't React

Learn how to respond to challenges from the “green zone” of the brain rather than reacting instinctively from the “red zone.” Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore the biology behind these two systems, the role of mindfulness in moving from one to the other, and how to combat the brain’s evolved negativity bias. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:45: The difference between “responding” and “reacting” 3:05: Responding vs. reacting in practice 6:45: The biology behind responding and reacting 9:10: The negative cycle of reacting 10:20: If reacting is stressful, why do we have that system? 12:40: Mindfulness and our reactions 13:25: What makes people respond rather than react? 16:20: The “quantity” vs. “quality” effect of green and red zone experiences 20:40: The cumulative effect of negative experiences 21:45: How to limit the impact of negative experiences 23:05: The positive spiral of taking in good experiences Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Maalis 201827min

Ep. 8: How to Meet Your Needs

Ep. 8: How to Meet Your Needs

Dr. Hanson explains why it’s not so bad to be “needy.” We all have needs for safety, satisfaction, and connection, the question is how can we meet them skillfully? Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:30: Why needs? 1:15: The three needs 2:55: Superficial needs 5:00: The role of mindfulness 6:00: Objections to our needs 7:00: Getting comfortable with neediness 7:50: The evolution of needs 9:00: How to address deep, rather than superficial, needs 11:30: How we can learn to distinguish between deep and superficial needs 13:00: The importance of internalization 14:20: Finding and meeting your key needs 16:20: Meeting needs by growing resources 18:20: Recap Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

27 Helmi 201820min

Ep. 7: Dealing with the Mind

Ep. 7: Dealing with the Mind

The mind is a dangerous neighborhood, and there are three ways we can skillfully 'deal with' the often problematic neighbor that lives in our heads. Rick and Forrest explore how we can be with our experience, let go of negative thoughts and feelings, and plant new flowers in the garden of the mind. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:30: What do we mean by ‘dealing with the mind?’ 3:00: The three ways to deal with the mind 4:50: Why the mind is like a garden 7:00: How mindfulness applies to dealing with the mind 9:30: Why intervention can be diagnostic 11:00: How to practically work through negative material 12:45: How is opening to your ‘experience’ different from opening to your ‘trip’? 14:45: Why the mind is like a septic tank 16:20: Sensing beneath the surface of the mind 19:45: Language, planning, and the brain 22:15: Experiencing things ‘out’ 23:10: Being kind to yourself 24:00: How do we get ‘good things’ into the brain? 29:00: Recap Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

20 Helmi 201830min

Ep. 6: Mindfulness

Ep. 6: Mindfulness

Dr. Hanson and Forrest begin this month's topic of Mindfulness by focusing on how we can use mindfulness in practical ways in the flow of our daily lives. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:45: What do we mean by "mindfulness"? 2:05: Two ways to apply mindfulness 3:45: Mindfulness as a tool 5:15: What are you using mindfulness to DO? 6:15: How can we use mindfulness to grow strengths? 9:00: The banquet table of life 10:10: Benefits and pitfalls of mindfulness 10:55: Why does mindfulness cause us to develop positive traits? 11:40: How can we become more mindful moment to moment? 13:00: The brain's unreliable narration 14:25: Being mindful of our own tendencies 16:40: How to grow mindfulness Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Helmi 201820min

Ep. 5: Take the Time to Enjoy Life

Ep. 5: Take the Time to Enjoy Life

Dr. Rick Hanson explains why enjoying life is both easy to dismiss and surprisingly hard to do. Particularly, he explores how we can authentically find enjoyable moments even during very difficult times in our lives. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:35: Why is enjoying life a strength to develop? 2:00: Enjoyment and the brain 3:15: The importance of key experiences. 4:30: Our cultural pitfalls around enjoyment. 7:30: How do we grow strengths? The problem with having a “stiff upper lip.” 8:40: What needs to be present alongside adversity for it to become an inner strength? 11:00: Learning from bad experiences. 12:15: Experiencing vs. Internalizing. 15:15: Finding enjoyment anywhere. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Helmi 201818min

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