Borderline Personality Disorder: Regulation, Nurturance, and Compassion

Borderline Personality Disorder: Regulation, Nurturance, and Compassion

One of the most important and challenging skills we can develop is learning to regulate our strong emotions. While it’s very natural to have fluctuations in how we feel about others and ourselves, for some people these ups and downs are particularly intense. At clinical levels, this is known as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). BPD is characterized by a pattern of instability in a person’s emotions, moods, behavior, self-image, and relationships. BPD is fairly common, and it's even more common for "borderline-y tendencies" to show up in our lives. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what to do when these tendencies show up, how to cultivate a healthy balance of sensitivity and tolerance to distress, regulating and nurturing ourselves, and how to navigate relationships with others when they exhibit borderline tendencies. As a disclaimer, formal diagnosis of any condition should be done with a medical professional working directly with the person in question. This podcast episode is not a substitute for that. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: What are "borderline tendencies"? 6:50: 9 Symptoms of BPD 9:10: The what, why, and how of mental health 11:25: Childhood influences on borderline tendencies 15:05: Instability, impulsivity, and the drive for reassurance 25:00: Recognizing varying degrees of borderline patterns 27:00: Practical tips–regulation and nurturance 32:50: Boundaries, and avoiding spiraling 37:50: Acceptance, and the desire for change 40:35: Sensitivity and distress tolerance 45:00: What to do when you notice borderline tendencies in a relationship 51:00: Recognizing how much someone's nature is going to change 53:35: Treatability 54:50: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ep. 3: How to Grow Self-Compassion

Ep. 3: How to Grow Self-Compassion

How we can use self-compassion to reduce rumination, feel safe while taking big risks, and improve our relationships with other people. Dr. Hanson and Forrest also explore what makes self-compassion different from self-pity or being on your own side. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:15: What are the benefits of self-compassion? 1:30: How is self-compassion different from "being on your own side"? 1:55: What's the difference between self-compassion and self-pity? 2:30: How can we be compassionate to ourselves without coming across like a complainer? 4:20: The fastest way to get people to stop talking AT you. 5:55: Using self-compassion to fight rumination 8:15: The function of rumination: avoiding a dreaded experience. 11:00: How to become more self-compassionate. 16:53: Summary and ending. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

22 Tammi 201818min

Ep. 2: Being On Your Own Side

Ep. 2: Being On Your Own Side

Dr. Hanson focuses on the importance of self-compassion - and particularly on why it's important to get "on your own side" in order to create lasting, positive change in the brain. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Timestamps: 0:35: Why start with compassion? 2:10: Why it's important to be on your own side. 4:30: Why does being for yourself promote well-being? 5:45: The importance of coping. 7:30: How do we get better at being for ourselves? 11:15: How to be consistent AFTER inspiration passes. 17:05: Recap Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

16 Tammi 201819min

Ep. 1: Introducing Resilience

Ep. 1: Introducing Resilience

What does it mean to truly be Resilient? Dr. Hanson explains the importance of Resilience and HOW we can grow the most important strength for achieving reliable happiness.  Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Timestamps: 0:30: Why resilience is important 2:05: The HOW of growing key strengths 5:00: Dealing with challenges/What's in your backpack? 6:30: Resources, challenges, and vulnerabilites 7:40: Changing the brain for the better 9:45: How is this different from just "positive thinking"? 11:10: The negativity bias 13:45: The hopefulness of growing strengths Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Tammi 201815min

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