Moving Beyond “Fair” to Build a Great Relationship with Nate and Kaley Klemp

Moving Beyond “Fair” to Build a Great Relationship with Nate and Kaley Klemp

These days couples often shoot for 50/50 in their relationships: an even split of responsibilities in the home or at work. But 50/50 often leads to fights over fairness, and this fixation on fairness can be the death of many relationships. On this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick are joined by Nate and Kaley Klemp to explore how we can build fun, fulfilling, and truly equitable relationships. Topics include Nate and Kaley’s early relationship struggles, different models of relationship, breaking out of old patterns, and how we can manage situations where one partner really is contributing significantly more than the other. About our Guests: Kaley Klemp is an executive coach and expert on small-group dynamics, and Nate Klemp is a bestselling author and founding partner at Mindful, one of the world's largest mindfulness media and training companies. Together, they’re the co-authors of The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier, Stronger Relationship. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Nate and Kaley’s personal relationship as a basis for their work 5:30: Three different models of relationship 9:30: Two pillars to 80/80 - mindset and structure 12:20: How a 50/50 dynamic caused problems for Nate and Kaley 19:20: The conscious or unconscious division of roles 21:30: Gratitude and generosity 25:40: Parenting, shared success, and being on a team 32:15: Getting your partner’s buy-in, reveal and request 39:50: Underlying beliefs and power imbalances 44:20: Creating structure (and data) to have difficult conversations 49:30: Distinguishing a reluctant partner from an unwilling partner 52:05: Key skills that distinguish successful couples 56:10: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ep. 3: How to Grow Self-Compassion

Ep. 3: How to Grow Self-Compassion

How we can use self-compassion to reduce rumination, feel safe while taking big risks, and improve our relationships with other people. Dr. Hanson and Forrest also explore what makes self-compassion different from self-pity or being on your own side. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Timestamps: 0:15: What are the benefits of self-compassion? 1:30: How is self-compassion different from "being on your own side"? 1:55: What's the difference between self-compassion and self-pity? 2:30: How can we be compassionate to ourselves without coming across like a complainer? 4:20: The fastest way to get people to stop talking AT you. 5:55: Using self-compassion to fight rumination 8:15: The function of rumination: avoiding a dreaded experience. 11:00: How to become more self-compassionate. 16:53: Summary and ending. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

22 Tammi 201818min

Ep. 2: Being On Your Own Side

Ep. 2: Being On Your Own Side

Dr. Hanson focuses on the importance of self-compassion - and particularly on why it's important to get "on your own side" in order to create lasting, positive change in the brain. Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book! Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Timestamps: 0:35: Why start with compassion? 2:10: Why it's important to be on your own side. 4:30: Why does being for yourself promote well-being? 5:45: The importance of coping. 7:30: How do we get better at being for ourselves? 11:15: How to be consistent AFTER inspiration passes. 17:05: Recap Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

16 Tammi 201819min

Ep. 1: Introducing Resilience

Ep. 1: Introducing Resilience

What does it mean to truly be Resilient? Dr. Hanson explains the importance of Resilience and HOW we can grow the most important strength for achieving reliable happiness.  Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price. Connect with the show: Visit us on the web Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Timestamps: 0:30: Why resilience is important 2:05: The HOW of growing key strengths 5:00: Dealing with challenges/What's in your backpack? 6:30: Resources, challenges, and vulnerabilites 7:40: Changing the brain for the better 9:45: How is this different from just "positive thinking"? 11:10: The negativity bias 13:45: The hopefulness of growing strengths Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Tammi 201815min

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