Repairing Self-Abandonment: Anxious Attachment, Healthy Boundaries, and Creating Strong Relationships

Repairing Self-Abandonment: Anxious Attachment, Healthy Boundaries, and Creating Strong Relationships

On today’s episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore self-abandonment, which occurs when we go against our authentic wants, emotions, and boundaries in order to serve others, meet external expectations, or protect ourselves emotionally. They cover where self-abandonment comes from, the psychological function it serves, and the relationship between self-abandonment and similar concepts like anxious attachment, low self-worth, and external referencing. You’ll learn how to set healthy boundaries, stop neglecting yourself, and become more secure from the inside out. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Common features of self-abandonment 12:30: Facing the fear of our authentic self being seen 16:05: Facing shame and self-criticism 21:00: Self-referencing vs. referencing ourselves in relation to others 33:10: The belief that safety feels more critical than authenticity 40:55: Our relationship to nature, and joining with the defense 50:55: Relationships, openness to change, and bringing parts into awareness 55:20: Cognitive restructuring, and redefining our self-abandoning beliefs 58:50: Recap Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month. Start each day right with IQBAR’s bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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The Dark Triad: Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People

The Dark Triad: Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People

Dr. Rick and Forrest unpack the "Dark Triad" of personality traits - narcissism, Machiavellianism, and sociopathy - and explore how these traits can manifest in everyday relationships. They talk about...

30 Syys 20241h 14min

How to Build a Securely Attached Relationship with Julie Menanno

How to Build a Securely Attached Relationship with Julie Menanno

Forrest sits down with marriage and family therapist Julie Menanno to explore one of the most crucial aspects of healthy relationships: secure attachment. They discuss the impact of anxious, avoidant,...

23 Syys 20241h 8min

Social Anxiety, Self-Advocacy, and Too Much Self-Help: September Mailbag

Social Anxiety, Self-Advocacy, and Too Much Self-Help: September Mailbag

Dr. Rick and Forrest dive into the mailbag, and answer questions from listeners focused on working with anxiety in ourselves and our relationships. They start with a question that’s essential to the p...

16 Syys 20241h 13min

Cognitive Bypassing, Traumatic Experiences, and Managing Triggers with Simone Saunders

Cognitive Bypassing, Traumatic Experiences, and Managing Triggers with Simone Saunders

Forrest dives into cognitive bypassing - a common strategy many of us use to avoid feeling difficult emotions - with trauma therapist Simone Saunders. Simone and Forrest discuss the connection between...

9 Syys 20241h 6min

Navigating Parenthood: What Every Dad Needs to Know

Navigating Parenthood: What Every Dad Needs to Know

In this special conversation, Forrest explores what it means to be a good father with his dad, clinical psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson. They discuss the joys, challenges, and unexpected lessons of paren...

2 Syys 20241h 17min

How to Live in an Anxious World: Uncertainty, Agency, and Resilience

How to Live in an Anxious World: Uncertainty, Agency, and Resilience

In this timely episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest tackle the anxiety and uncertainty so many are feeling about the state of today’s world. They discuss why everything feels so overwhelming right now, share...

26 Elo 20241h 6min

Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler

Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler

Forrest explores how we can harness perfectionism’s strengths without getting captured by its vulnerabilities with therapist and author Katherine Morgan Schafler. They talk about perfectionism’s bad b...

19 Elo 20241h 19min

The Shadow: Individuation, Wholeness, and Becoming Your True Self

The Shadow: Individuation, Wholeness, and Becoming Your True Self

Dr. Rick and Forrest explore one of the most interesting concepts in psychology: Carl Jung’s concept of the shadow. The shadow includes the “the things a person has no wish to be,” the uncomfortable a...

12 Elo 20241h 8min

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