SWE: Sex Tips from a Gay Man

When you hear the words “BDSM” and “kink,” what comes to mind? Leather? Whips? The truth is, all of us are a little kinky – you may just not have realized it yet. That’s why today’s episode is part 1 of a two-part BDSM and kink education series, where I help demystify this world and give you fun, safe options for exploring. Dungeons optional.  First, we’re defining our terms and getting a grasp on kink and BDSM – including, what the hell “BDSM” actually means. Next, we’re taking a look at core desires to help you identify yours, and talking about the psychology of power and play. Finally, I’m giving you some entry-level ways to bring kink to the bedroom, whether you’re coupled or single…and, answering all of your kinky questions.  Show Notes: 6 Kink Styles (& How to Explore Them) Ask Emily: Kink and BDSM Ideas Coming Together w/ Celeste and Danielle The Yes No Maybe List  5 Easy Steps to Start Exploring The Communication Guide  Kink & Casual w/ Justin Lehmiller 5 BDSM Games to Spice Up Your Sex Life Tonight BDSM: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink You’re Kinkier Than You Think, Part 2 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

7 Kesä 202233min

Whether it’s erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation or a slight penis curve, it’s common to have penis questions – especially when they’re affecting your sex life. But where do you go for answers? You come right here, to this informative convo between me and urologist Dr. Edward Karpman, as well as Jeff Abraham of Promescent.    On this best-of show, we’re talking to you all about penis shockwave therapy, what to do when you can get erect (but aren’t climaxing), what to do when you take ED meds (but aren’t getting hard), and much more. Plus, I take your intimacy questions! How to get out of your head during sex, how to reduce anxiety in the run-up to intercourse, and how to effectively work with your penis as you get older.    Show Notes: Missionary Sex Position - New and Improved For more Dr. Karpman: Website | Instagram For more information about Promescent: Website | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

3 Kesä 202248min

If you’re a parent or caregiver, should you talk to your child about masturbation? Yes. You absolutely should, even if it’s awkward, even if your own parents didn’t talk about it with you. (And let’s be real: they probably didn’t.) But I get it – finding the words can be hard, especially for such a touchy subject. That’s why today’s episode is devoted entirely to giving you tools, scripts and resources to help you. First, I give you the big why: Why should you talk to your children, and teens specifically, about masturbation? I’ll give you several science-backed reasons why it’s wise to do so. Next, we’ll do some masturbation myth-busting, to help alleviate any concerns, on their part or yours, that it’s harmful or unhealthy. Great news: it’s not! And finally, I’ll walk you through how to have this conversation, with specific verbiage you can use to help put yourself and your child at ease. Don’t worry caregivers: I got you, and in this episode I’ll also answer your questions about teens and sex. Should you talk to your teen about ethical porn? What should you do if a teen daughter starts asking about sex toys? All this and more on today’s show.  Show Notes: Sex Positive Families: Website | Instagram Dr Lanae St John: Book | On Sex with Emily Shafia Zaloom: Book | On Sex with Emily Cory Silverberg: Website What should I teach my high school-aged teen about sex and sexuality? Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 1) Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 2) The Communication Guide  Big Mouth Sex Education  Good Vibrations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

31 Touko 202236min

On any given day, how do you talk about sex? Do you bone? Screw? Make love? According to my guest Amanda Montell, author of Wordslut, Cultish, and host of the podcast “Sounds Like a Cult,” the words we use to discuss sex reveals our attitudes about sex as a whole – even shaping the way we show up in the bedroom.    In this fascinating best of episode, Amanda and I talk about sex slang and body part euphemisms, like the fact that we frequently cute-ify female genitals to make them less threatening. But before you go, “oh this is thinky academic stuff,” know this: practically-speaking, your sex life WILL improve as your communication improves. Listen in, as Amanda and I play with language to get the sex we want.  For More Amanda Montell: Wordslut: A Feminist Guide to Taking Back the English Language Sounds Like a Cult Podcast | Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism Website | Instagram | Twitter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

27 Touko 202250min

How exactly does masturbation help a sexual partnership? Let me count the ways… It’s Part 2 of our Masturbation Pro Tips series, and in today’s episode, we’re talking solo sex in the context of a relationship. I’m addressing some of the most common questions I get on the subject, such as: “if I already have a partner, why masturbate?” and: “if I masturbate in private, is it cheating?” We also discuss whether or not you should tell your partner if you masturbate, and touch briefly on porn addiction: starting with, is it real? Plus, I take your questions! How to set up your own “masturbation zone” when you live with a partner, whether it’s possible to have fantasy-free masturbation sessions, what to do if you can orgasm on your own but not with a partner, and much more.  Show Notes: How to Find the Best Lube for You Masturbation Pro Tips (Part 1) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

25 Touko 202235min

Missionary gets a bad rap. I’ve seen it called the “comfy sweater” of sex – and can we talk about the name? Not sexy. Almost…anti-sexy. But despite its label, I don’t think that’s why missionary is considered vanilla or boring. It’s simply the default position, the one a lot of us fall into automatically – making it easier for us to tune out, phone it in, and miss out on any potential eroticism.  So on today’s episode, we’re going to make missionary more exploratory, as I address some of your common complaints. Such as: how do we make it more exciting? I’ll tell you all the reasons I love missionary, and give you technique tips to make it more surprising and fun. Next, vulva owners: are you having a hard time reaching orgasm in missionary? Of course you are: it’s not the prime position for clitoral stimulation, so I’ll offer position hacks that make it more pleasurable. Finally, is it possible to be kinky during missionary? Oh yeah: from bondage to dirty talk, we can leverage all that eye contact to turn it into the hot experience you crave.   Show Notes:  Missionary Sex Position - New and Improved The “Bottom” Line On Anal w/ Dr Evan Goldstein  Pillo by Dame Position Breakdown: Doggy Style Vs Cat Position Magic Wand Mini Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

20 Touko 202233min

Housewife turned billion-dollar co-founder Lisa Bilyeu is the picture of confidence: she’s got a thriving business, a partner she adores, and basically, is a literal boss. But she also overcame illness, insecurity, and massive relationship challenges to get where she is today. In her new book Radical Confidence, Lisa shares the lessons that changed her life, and helped her become the hero of her own story. On today’s show, I ask her about keeping the sexual spark alive in a longterm relationship, the “purgatory of the mundane,” and how to have a growth mindset with your partner. Show Notes: More: Radical Confidence More Lisa: Instagram  How to Find The Best Lube for You Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

17 Touko 20221h 13min

So listen: is sex addiction real? We’ve all heard stories of infidelity followed by explanations of sex addiction as the reason for the behavior. But the truth is, just because someone cheats doesn’t mean they’re a sex addict.  According to therapist Marnie Breecker from the Center for Relational Healing, sex addiction is indeed real: it’s an intimacy disorder with both emotional and physiological symptoms. On this best of show, Marnie and I talk about the common and compulsive behaviors of sex addiction, the deep human need for love and connection, affordable treatment options, love addiction, a how-to on IMAGO therapy (a great tool for communication) and healing steps for couples.  Show Notes: More Marnie: Website | Instagram  Sex Addicts Anonymous Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

13 Touko 202237min