Dan Wilson

This week we talk to Eric Barker Eric is a thought leader in the field of success. His humorous but practical blog, Barking up the Wrong Tree, presents science-based answers and expert insight on success in life. Over 270,000 people subscribe to his weekly email update and his content is syndicated by Time, The Week, and Business Insider. He has been featured in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Financial Times, and he was a columnist for Wired. With a writing career spanning over twenty years, Eric is also a sought-after speaker and interview subject and has been invited to speak at MIT, West Point, NPR affiliates, and on morning television. His first book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong is available now. In This Interview, Eric Barker and I Discuss... His book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong How he defines success Achievement, Happiness, Significance, Legacy The dangers of only using one metric for happiness How money is a lever to something else that makes you happy rather than the thing that makes you happy in and of itself There's no finish line in the quest of what makes me feel good We must decide what is "enough" New and novel make our brains happy We must decide what really is going to make us happy in the long run Turning what we do in our lives into games can be helpful in increasing our persistence and grit Games have these attributes: Winnable, Novelty, Goals, Instantaneous Feedback A feeling of progress and meaningful work keeps us engaged Challenging yourself in a familiar task True burnout is when you start to feel pessimistic about your job so you withdraw and then you get poor feedback so you finally disengage Autonomy, Mastery and Purpose A change is as good as a rest That we are telling ourselves stories about what's has meaning and what doesn't How telling your children about their lineage will increase the likelihood they stay away from drugs, stay in school etc Therapy as editing the story we're telling about our lives Cognitive reappraisal The role of positive self-talk I can do it vs I can't take this anymore If you break your arm you wouldn't say "I am broken" you'd say "My arm is broken" Listening to our thoughts from a distance and asking "is this useful?" to be more mindful about what thoughts we identify with We don't choose what makes us happy, we choose what's easy The role of a plan How anticipation is happiness     Please Support The Show with a Donation   m is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear. The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?” The grandfather quietly replies, the one you feed  The Tale of Two Wolves is often attributed to the Cherokee indians but there seems to be no real proof of this. It has also been attributed to evangelical preacher Billy Graham and Irish Playwright George Bernard Shaw. It appears no one knows for sure but this does not diminish the power of the parable. This parable goes by many names including: The Tale of Two Wolves The Parable of the Two Wolves Two Wolves Which Wolf Do You Feed Which Wolf are You Feeding Which Wolf Will You Feed It also often features different animals, mainly two dogs.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

1 Elo 201744min

This week we talk to Gregg Krech GREGG KRECH is an author, poet, and one of the leading authorities on Japanese Psychology in North America. His work has been featured in THE SUN magazine, Tricycle, SELF, Utne Reader, Counseling Today, Cosmopolitan and Experience Life. His books include Naikan: Gratitude, Grace, and the Japanese Art of Self-Reflection, A Natural Approach to Mental Wellness, and  The Art of Taking Action.  His newest book, Question Your Life, will be available soon. Gregg and his wife, Linda, founded the ToDo Institute (http://www.todoinstitute.org), a non-profit center in Vermont that uses Japanese Psychology as an alternative to traditional Western approaches to psychology. Over the past 25 years, Gregg has introduced Japanese Psychology, particularly Naikan Therapy, Morita Therapy and Kaizen, to thousands of people through his workshops and online courses. His work supports a blend of the psychological, the spiritual and the practical, and helps individuals to clarify purpose, cultivate gratitude, develop compassion and engage in meaningful action. He is a member of the North American Naikan Counsel and Editor in Chief for the quarterly journal "Thirty Thousand Days: A Journal for Purposeful Living.   In This Interview, Gregg Krech and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable His book, The Art of Taking Actions: Lessons from Japanese Psychology How Eastern wisdom is directed towards taking action, as well as contemplation Taking your practice off your cushion The misguided premise that we have to figure things out in our life before we can act The power of momentum in action when small steps are taken Cultivating gratitude Avoidance, resignation, complaining How accepting things as they are isn't necessarily passive That complaining keeps us stuck in focusing on the trouble in our lives The overlap between ACT and Japenese Therapy Feelings and thoughts are uncontrollable by our will Allowing feelings to be what they are but not letting them inhibit our ability to move forward and take action Taking action based on the needs of the situation rather than just on the feelings we have  How essential it is to step back from our lives and reflect and then make choices on how you need to move forward How most of the time we do not feel like doing the things that need to be done Exercise being an example! The maxim: Lead with the body How if you don't feel like something now, you're probably never really going to want to do it so get it done now That the anticipation is often worse than the consummation His next book that focuses on self-reflection       Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

26 Heinä 201734min

Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Matthew Quick Matthew Quick is the New York Times bestselling author of The Silver Linings Playbook, which was made into an Oscar-winning film; The Good Luck of Right Now; Love May Fail; The Reason You Are Alive; and four young adult novels: Sorta Like a Rock Star; Boy21; Forgive Me Leonard Peacock; and Every Exquisite Thing. His work has been translated into more than thirty languages, received a PEN/Hemingway Award Honorable Mention, was an LA Times Book Prize finalist, a New York Times Book Review Editors’ Choice, a #1 bestseller in Brazil, a Deutscher Jugendliteratur Preis 2016 (German Youth Literature Prize) nominee, and selected by Nancy Pearl as one of Summer’s Best Books for NPR. The Hollywood Reporter has named him one of Hollywood’s 25 Most Powerful Authors. All of his books have been optioned for film. In This Interview, Matthew Quick and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable His new book, The Reason You're Alive ICATS - what it means and why limiting it in your life is helpful to anxiety How public speaking causes him to have anxiety His calming practices to manage his anxiety Why dismissing whole groups of people is a mistake The importance and benefit of meeting people who are different than you Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comforted Generational tendencies in worldviews The damage that's done when we shame others about their thoughts The relationship between anger and fear How silencing people is un-American and frustrating The transparency of the main character in his new book Humor is experiencing the unexpected Laughing and Crying give relief to tension The major life changes he has made over the past 3 years and their impact Believing he couldn't function without alcohol and Rxs The long-term benefit of passing on some forms of short term relief The power of the past to continue to live on Every experience leaves an impact on you and affects the rest of your life The power of focusing on process and not result       Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

18 Heinä 201749min

Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Russ Harris Russ Harris is a medical practitioner, psychotherapist, and leading expert in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). His books include ACT with Love, ACT Made Simple, The Confidence Gap, and The Happiness Trap, which has now been translated into twenty-two languages. He lives in Melbourne, Australia, and travels internationally to train mental health professionals in the ACT approach. In This Interview, Russ Harris and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable The principle of connection in ACT Practicing attention in the shower The exercise of "notice 5 things" How to notice the person you come home to in a new way The physical practices of yoga and tai chi The observing self vs the thinking self The scientific study of spirituality Living a spiritual life even if it's not a religious life Values = desired qualities of action The difference between goals and values Examples of how you can live your values on your way to your goals Committed Action Examining your life to identify areas where your behavior is not reflecting your values The basic ACT formula of "Be Present, Open Up, Do What Matters"       Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

11 Heinä 201728min

Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Russ Harris Russ Harris is a medical practitioner, psychotherapist, and leading expert in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). His books include ACT with Love, ACT Made Simple, The Confidence Gap, and The Happiness Trap, which has now been translated into twenty-two languages. He lives in Melbourne, Australia, and travels internationally to train mental health professionals in the ACT approach. In This Interview, Russ Harris and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable Getting the wolves to cooperate and not battle Embracing even our most difficult feelings The Reality Slap and the Reality Gap An overview of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) The Serenity Challenge How we always have a chance to improve our situation  Taking the action that is needed regardless of what we feel What "psychological flexibility" is Cognitive defusion techniques Recognizing that are thoughts are not facts Asking the question "Is this thought useful"? Noticing and Naming our thoughts and feelings "The Greatest Hits" approach The "I'm not good enough" story" "I'm having the thought that" de-fusion method The artificial distinction between thoughts and emotions The Struggle Switch         Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

5 Heinä 201741min

Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Justin Stenstrom Justin Stenstrom the founder of EliteManMagazine.com, the host of the Elite Man Podcast on iTunes, a best-selling author, life coach, and speaker. He has been featured on major news websites like The Huffington Post, Maxim, The Good Men Project, Lifehack, Elite Daily, and many more. In This Interview, Justin Stenstrom and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable His podcast, The Elite Man Taking control of the thoughts in your head Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) Hypnosis How he has battled anxiety, panic attacks, and depression in his life The powerful, subconscious mind vs the conscious mind The role of positive affirmations and suggestions Reprogramming the subconscious mind to be happier What a successful hypnotic session feels like How some people can be hypnotized and others cannot The key learnings from his podcast The guests from his podcast who stick out to him The power of failure or rejection to propel people forward in their lives and/or careers The supplements that he recommends for depression Fish Oil with DHA and EPA Omega 6 and Omega 3 ratio Vitamin D B complex Magnesium Citrate       Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

28 Kesä 201731min

LA Times- Michael Owen Baker     Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Heather Havrilesky Heather Havrilesky writes the popular advice column Ask Polly for New York Magazine’s The Cut. She is the author of the memoir Disaster Preparedness and the new advice book How to Be a Person in the World. She writes The Best Seller List column for Book Forum and has written for The New Yorker, The New York Times Magazine, The Atlantic, Esquire, The Los Angeles Times, NPR's All Things Considered, and many other publications. In This Interview, Heather Havrilesky and I Discuss... The Wolf Parable Her book, How to Be a Person in the World Coming to peace with your flaws Finding a place within yourself where who you are is enough What a beautiful life is to her How she is constantly checking and rebalancing areas of her life The serenity prayer "Is the juice worth the squeeze?" That touching the same flame can be dangerous to some people Seeing your life as a series of problems instead of a patchwork of things to savor That there isn't an objectively "good way to be" How people are far more complex than we give them credit for The question of "does it serve you" is a good one to ask yourself in relationships Not knowing how to get below the surface with people How she has finally learned to relax around other people That people are trapped in their head To not beat yourself up for falling into the same "pot holes" over and over         Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

21 Kesä 201747min

Please Support The Show With a Donation   This week we talk to Colin Gawel Colin Gawel is the guitarist of the American rock band, Watershed. Colin also has a solo career both with and without his backing band - Colin Gawel and the Lonely  Bones. The album Superior - The Best of Colin Gawel was released in Dec 2016. Colin also lead writer, editor, and founder of the website Pencilstorm and the owner of the legendary Colin's Coffee in Columbus, Ohio. This conversation was recorded live in Colin's kitchen and is focused on fatherhood in honor of Father's Day this weekend. In This Interview, Colin Gawel and I Discuss... Father's Day His song, Dad Can't Help You Now The challenge of watching your child live life beyond your protection What it feels like as a parent for your child to leave home Talking to your children about addiction in their family history Being on the little league baseball team together as kids How important it is to come back from adversity Doing things for the love of doing them rather than for the anticipated outcome His time in the band, Watershed Keeping things in balance in life That time is precious How we find resilience in life The importance of the people you surround yourself with How he writes about what it's like to be an adult in his music His song, The Words We Say How different people react and interpret his songs differently How unusual it is that as a musician, he prefers to perform sober rather than high on something That he's conscious of how his son sees him consuming alcohol Our mutual love of music His song, Try a Little Faith         Please Support The Show with a DonationSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

14 Kesä 201746min