Adoption Constellation Round Table Fall 2023

Adoption Constellation Round Table Fall 2023

“What is the hard part about adoption? ADOPTION is the hard part of adoption.”
—A guest in Episode 21

Several adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies gather around the table to suss out the question, “What is hard about adoption?”

  • Is it relinquishment vs adoption? Abandonment vs assimilation?
  • Is it severance of family and cultural ties?
  • Is it having to forage for information?
  • Is it ignorance coming into the adoption process for both expectant parents and adoptive parents?
  • Is it later feelings of guilt and regret for all we did not know?
  • Is it separation that’s felt all through the years?
  • Is it unexpected and unacknowledged grief?
  • Is it the gratitude that is expected?
  • Is it the imbalance in power dynamics?
  • Is it powerlessness over how the story is told?
  • Is it any number of other aspects brought on by the institutionalization of adoption?

Thanks to each of our guests—each of whom we interviewed for our book, Adoption Unfiltered—for sharing their personal experience, professional insights, and hard-won wisdom about the hard parts of adoption.

Jaksot(32)

Adoption Terminology: Words Matter

Adoption Terminology: Words Matter

Sara (adoptee), Kelsey (birth mom) and Lori (adoptive mom) offer their perspectives on various words people in the triad are called, like “ungrateful adoptee,” “first mom,” and “adoptoraptor.” Plus, o...

2 Touko 202344min

Birth Fathers and Adoption

Birth Fathers and Adoption

There aren’t too many spaces in which men are marginalized, but Adoption Land is one of them. Birth Father Ridghaus joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom...

2 Touko 202347min

Adoptee-Centered Relationships Between Adoptive Parents and Birth Parents

Adoptee-Centered Relationships Between Adoptive Parents and Birth Parents

A viewer asked: how can adoptive parents and birth parents best navigate adoption relationships and center the adoptee? Great question! Sara reveals the main thing an adoptee needs from adoptive paren...

2 Touko 202332min

Money in Adoption

Money in Adoption

Money in adoption affects all of us. But it affects each of us differently. Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden talk about why domestic infant ad...

2 Touko 202349min

Problematic Behaviors of Adoptive Parents

Problematic Behaviors of Adoptive Parents

Adoptee Astrid Castro of Adoption Mosaic, joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden to discuss some of the problematic behaviors of adoptive pare...

2 Touko 20231h 4min

Adoption & Mental Health

Adoption & Mental Health

An adoptee (Sara Easterly) a birth mom (Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard), and an adoptive mom (Lori Holden) talk together about the important topic of adoption and mental health as it affects each side of...

2 Touko 202340min

Why Talk to Each Other?

Why Talk to Each Other?

An adoptee (Sara Easterly) a birth mom (Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard), and an adoptive mom (Lori Holden) address an elephant in the room that appeared from our last talk on naming newborns: why SHOULD ...

2 Touko 202328min

Considerations Around Naming Newborns

Considerations Around Naming Newborns

An adoptee (Sara Easterly) a birth mom (Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard), and an adoptive mom (Lori Holden) help each other better understand the issue and impact of naming a baby born into an adoption si...

2 Touko 202335min

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