Episode 345: The Amityville Hat

Ho ho ho! Merry Kickmas to all, and to all a good....show?!?! Wowee gang, it looks like the original elf on the shelf himself has shown up to drop a little audio present down your head chimney, as Mike and Jesse cuddle up by the fireplace to celebrate Christmas the only way they know how...with a belly full of hot cocoa and bigtime laughs! This week, Mike receives a special Kickmas song, Jesse wishes for a new scale that doesn't lie, and our old friend Kris Kringle joins us from the North Pole to talk about his new business venture and which famous sportswriters are going to hell.For more reasons you gotta love peeing outdoors, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. You'll be treated to enough bonus episodes to get you through yet another painful family holiday experience.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste (toothpastefordinner.com)@joeClarkChicagoand the classic Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

24 Joulu 20171h 41min

A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...two guys recorded this friggin podcast! Come on! Well, the YKS Studios may not be a rough and tumble watering hole on a desert planet at the edge of hyperspace, but this week Mike and Jesse take the willing listener on a tour beyond the stars to meet some fascinating letter creatures, catch up with various bogs, and study the enchanting Bruh Man. Plus, a listener quits his job. Now get your behind out of that wretched hive of scum and villainy and "shoot first" on over to your podcast app to check it out!For more tips on how to become Albert Einstein, check out Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Dozens of hours of exclusive bonus episodes await you from their carbonite prisons. Music for this week's YKS is courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)The Hell Yeah Babies (thehellyeahbabies.com)And the fabulous Mark Brendle Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

20 Joulu 20171h 48min

It's another banger, gang, as Jesse and Mike tackle whether or not Jesus was smart, the various benefits of sleeping with a breathing bean, and the optimal number of steps for using a cup. Plus, your letters and a very urgent voicemail. To contribute to the show, write on in at yourkickstartersucks@gmail.com or call the YKS Hotline at 802-359-PISS (it was the last number they had). For more coffee obelisks, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. There are more episodes there for you to listen to. Finally, visit shop.yourkickstartersucks.com for all of your Mike & Jesse merchandise needs. Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), The Hell Yeah Babies (www.thehellyeahbabies.com) and Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

13 Joulu 20171h 28min

Well gang, the boys are lookin' for a fight tonight and this time...they've got backup. That's right, on today's show Mike and Jesse are joined by Mike Pfeiffer to talk about standing in a circle around one small bean, The Hell Yeah Babies' new (Kickstarter-funded!) album, and play a thrilling new game called Queens of Rock. Don't like hearing three people talk? Would rather hear just two people talk? Okay! Mike and Jesse also get back into the classic tandem flow to talk Pastor Dreams, Magilla Gorilla on Krokodil, and dog trades. You're not gonna wanna miss this dadgum thing so slap that hell yeah button and pork on your ear buds gang.You can find The Hell Yeah Babies' new single "Grenadine Nosebleeds" everywhere you listen to music on December 8th. Check 'em out on Twitter: @hellyeahbabies.For more Mr. Softee Content, kindly subscribe to the YKS Patreon at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Our current offer includes bonus content in exchange for a modest fee. Finally, music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the singular Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

6 Joulu 20171h 55min

In the only version of Episode 38 to not be confined to the dustbin of history, Mike and Jesse reconnect on a post-Turkey Day extravaganza to riff on healthcare, a millennial Santa, and whether the podcast is being pirated by hackers across the globe. Plus, a role-reversed edition of Real or Fake, and your letters.For more of our favorite Lous, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for this episode of YKS is courtesy ofThe Hell Yeah Babies (www.thehellyeahbabies.com)Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and Mark BrendleSix pack: Closca - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/closca-bottle/closca-bottle-app-drink-water-make-a-statementSuccess Dice - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1384336/success-diceMemes of Art - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/483069905/memes-of-artArtificial Intelligence Party - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1597129265/artificial-intelligence-political-decision-makingSmart Pourer - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/smartpourer/smartpourer-is-your-personal-smart-pouring-spoutLootopia - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1229200050/lootopia-the-subscription-box-revolution-is-here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

27 Marras 20172h 7min

Check this out...It's a damn holiday miracle. Today only, or only the other times when it seems like a good idea to do, we are putting up nearly a full hour of the wonderful YKS Premium episode we did with Drew Toothpaste last week. So, enjoy this Jokeblogger Top Ten deep dive, and sign up at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to hear the rest. Plus, we've got a full free episode coming later this week as well, so you have lots of things to do instead of talking to your relatives. Ok thanks. I have to go to the store now. ByeMusic for YKS Premium is courtesy of Twitter's @LydiaBurrell and the Fabulous Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

21 Marras 201756min

Well it's been a tough year for ice cream, and a tough couple of weeks with no new YKS. But Michael "Donald Trump" Hale is back from the Pac-NW to kickstart our hearts, and OH YEAH you know he's wearin' flannel. On this episode of the show, Spooky November creeps along, we Make Chili Great Again, and, of course, there's plenty of that classic portable toilet talk. For more on what looks like a fam, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks (bonus episode with Drew Toothpaste coming this week)!Music for YKS is provided:The aforementioned Drew Toothpaste of theworstthingsforsale.com, The Hell Yeah Babies of www.thehellyeahbabies.com, and the fabulous Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

13 Marras 20171h 31min

Operation Dumbo Drop is a 1995 American war comedy film directed by Simon Wincer that explores war, politics, and animal welfare. The storyline was conceived from a screenplay written by Gene Quintano and Jim Kouf based on a true story by United States Army Major Jim Morris. The film stars Danny Glover and Ray Liotta as Green Berets during the Vietnam War in 1968, who attempt to transport an elephant through jungle terrain to a local South Vietnamese village which in turn helps American forces monitor Viet Cong activity.For more purloined movie synopses, visit Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks where you will find more hours of bonus content than you could possibly know what do with.YKS: The Music is provided by The Hell Yeah Babies, Drew Toothpaste, and Mark Brendle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

25 Loka 20171h 30min