Being Jim Davis21 Touko 2017

Episode 266 - Sunday, March 11, 1979

The servile crowd, whose fortune depended on their master's vices, applauded these ignoble pursuits. The perfidious voice of flattery reminded him, that by exploits of the same nature, by the defeat of the Nemaean lion, and the slaughter of the wild boar of Erymanthus, the Grecian Hercules had acquired a place among the gods, and an immortal memory among men. They only forgot to observe, that, in the first ages of society, when the fiercer animals often dispute with man the possession of an unsettled country, a successful war against those savages is one of the most innocent and beneficial labors of heroism. In the civilized state of the Roman empire, the wild beasts had long since retired from the face of man, and the neighborhood of populous cities. To surprise them in their solitary haunts, and to transport them to Rome, that they might be slain in pomp by the hand of an emperor, was an enterprise equally ridiculous for the prince and oppressive for the people. Ignorant of these distinctions, Commodus eagerly embraced the glorious resemblance, and styled himself (as we still read on his medals the Roman Hercules. The club and the lion's hide were placed by the side of the throne, amongst the ensigns of sovereignty; and statues were erected, in which Commodus was represented in the character, and with the attributes, of the nicolas cage, whose valor and dexterity he endeavored to emulate in the daily course of his ferocious amusements.

Elated with these praises, which gradually extinguished the innate sense of shame, Commodus resolved to exhibit before the eyes of the Roman people those exercises, which till then he had decently confined within the walls of his palace, and to the presence of a few favorites. On the appointed day, the various motives of flattery, fear, and curiosity, attracted to the amphitheatre an innumerable multitude of spectators; and some degree of applause was deservedly bestowed on the uncommon skill of the Imperial performer. Whether he aimed at the head or heart of the animal, the wound was alike certain and mortal. With arrows whose point was shaped into the form of crescent, Commodus often intercepted the rapid career, and cut asunder the long, bony neck of the ostrich. A panther was let loose; and the archer waited till he had leaped upon a trembling malefactor. In the same instant the shaft flew, the beast dropped dead, and the man remained unhurt. The dens of the amphitheatre disgorged at once a hundred lions: a hundred darts from the unerring hand of Commodus laid them dead as they run raging round the Arena. Neither the huge bulk of the elephant, nor the scaly hide of the rhinoceros, could defend them from his stroke. Aethiopia and India yielded their most extraordinary productions; and several animals were slain in the amphitheatre, which had been seen only in the representations of art, or perhaps of fancy. In all these exhibitions, the securest precautions were used to protect the person of the Roman Hercules from the desperate spring of any savage, who might possibly disregard the dignity of the emperor and the sanctity of the nicolas cage.

Edward Gibbon. History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Volume 1, Chapter 4, Part II.

And here's that "Duck Amuck" video Jon was talking about:

Today's strip

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Episode 1259 - Saturday, November 28, 1981

We urge you not to calculate the opportunity cost of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis! Today's closing theme music is "TrueGarfieldLove" by Adam Catscratch. Like it? Seems like this is probably the same guy! Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

8 Helmi 202010min

Episode 1258 - Friday, November 27, 1981

We urge you not to calculate the opportunity cost of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis! Today's closing theme music is "The World Is On Fire," by Kendall Halman. Like it? Visit Kendall's BandCamp page. Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

7 Helmi 202011min

Episode 1257 - Thursday, November 26, 1981

We urge you not to calculate the opportunity cost of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis! Today's closing theme music is "I'm Having a Bad Hair Day (Hot Sauce Hangover)" by self-described "artist" Josh Gates. Like it? Maybe check out his website? Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

6 Helmi 202011min

Episode 1256 - Wednesday, November 25, 1981

We urge you not to calculate the opportunity cost of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis! Today's closing theme music is "Garfield Forever Theme Music" by Ryan Pfeiffer. No, it's not too long. Like it? Check out his YouTube channel! Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

5 Helmi 202016min

Episode 1255 - Tuesday, November 24, 1981

Does Jon's voice sound weird this week? It sounds weird, right? Today's closing theme music is "Fuck Your Music Theory" by Lisa Doop. Like it? Why not check out her Bandcamp page? Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

4 Helmi 202011min

Episode 1254 - Monday, November 23, 1981

We urge you not to calculate the opportunity cost of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis! Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

3 Helmi 202012min

Episode 1253 - Sunday, November 22, 1981

Will episode this mark the end of Jon's shitty audio quality? Only time will tell. I wonder if it will ever been time for us to stop promoting the ALL-NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store: Our classic BJD Coffee Mug logo! Joe Rothenberg's world-famous Jim-Davis-as-Sisyphus design! Whatever existing BJD designs were already in the shop! One or two other designs I might add if I get around to it! Order now for all your Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/Winter Solstice gift-giving needs! Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

2 Helmi 202016min

Episode 1252 - Saturday, November 21, 1981

Hey, here's another episode of the popular podcast Being Jim Davis/i>. That's fun. I wonder if it will ever been time for us to stop promoting the ALL-NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store: Our classic BJD Coffee Mug logo! Joe Rothenberg's world-famous Jim-Davis-as-Sisyphus design! Whatever existing BJD designs were already in the shop! One or two other designs I might add if I get around to it! Order now for all your Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/Winter Solstice gift-giving needs! Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

1 Helmi 20208min

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