Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler

Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler

Forrest explores how we can harness perfectionism’s strengths without getting captured by its vulnerabilities with therapist and author Katherine Morgan Schafler. They talk about perfectionism’s bad branding, and how our relationship with perfectionism can lead to it being either a superpower or a stumbling block. They discuss the different types of perfectionists, the limitations of defining perfectionism merely as a defense against criticism, and the importance of shifting our language around self-criticism. You’ll learn about the difference between power and control, why self-compassion beats self-punishment, and how to keep perfectionism in check while still reaching your goals. About our Guest: Katherine is a psychotherapist, former on-site therapist at Google, and author of the recent book The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Defining perfectionism 6:00: Ideals, identity, and asking yourself how and why you’re striving 12:40: The five types of perfectionists 21:55: Why defining perfectionism as a ‘defense against criticism’ falls short 28:20: Changing our vocabulary around self-criticism 34:00: Why self-punishment doesn’t work 38:10: The difference between power and control 44:40: Splitting vs. scaling, and reaching out for connection 49:10: When perfectionistic tendencies invade our relationships 54:10: The intention that drives real goals, and finding your metric for measuring success 1:07:10: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell. Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Anxious-Avoidant Relationships, Narcissism, and Insight to Action: Mailbag

Anxious-Avoidant Relationships, Narcissism, and Insight to Action: Mailbag

Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag to answer questions about complex situations where good process really matters. They discuss whether to get back with an ex who has seemingly changed, relation...

1 Syys 20251h 11min

Limerence: The Psychology of Romantic Obsession with Brandy Wyant

Limerence: The Psychology of Romantic Obsession with Brandy Wyant

Forrest and therapist Brandy Wyant discuss limerence, an intense and often one-sided state of romantic obsession. They explore how limerence differs from both love and ordinary crushes, why uncertaint...

25 Elo 20251h 4min

Mingyur Rinpoche: A Meditation Master on Anxiety, Awareness, and Awakening

Mingyur Rinpoche: A Meditation Master on Anxiety, Awareness, and Awakening

Dr. Rick and Forrest are joined by Mingyur Rinpoche, a renowned Tibetan Buddhist teacher, to explore calming anxiety with awareness, relaxing unhealthy wanting, and finding a deeper sense of our innat...

18 Elo 20251h 8min

9 Lessons from the Great Minds of Psychoanalysis

9 Lessons from the Great Minds of Psychoanalysis

Dr. Rick and Forrest explore the evolution of psychoanalysis after Freud, highlighting key ideas from figures like Adler, Klein, Winnicott, and Hillman. They track how the field expanded from focusing...

11 Elo 20251h 47min

Reclaiming Anger: Trauma, Repression, and Healthy Protest with Elizabeth Ferreira

Reclaiming Anger: Trauma, Repression, and Healthy Protest with Elizabeth Ferreira

Forrest and associate therapist Elizabeth Ferreira talk about healthy (and unhealthy) anger. They challenge the common framing of anger as a “secondary emotion,” and explore why anger matters, how it ...

4 Elo 20251h 7min

Psychoanalysis: Therapy’s Controversial Origins

Psychoanalysis: Therapy’s Controversial Origins

Dr. Rick and Forrest explore the ideas, context, and legacy of psychoanalysis, the often-controversial origin point for modern therapy. They discuss psychoanalysis’ early history and key concepts like...

28 Heinä 20251h 32min

Is Self-Help Making You Miserable?

Is Self-Help Making You Miserable?

Forrest and Dr. Rick discuss what's really wrong with the self-help industry, going beyond the obvious pseudoscience and snake oil to examine deeper structural issues. They explore the industry's mixe...

21 Heinä 20251h 26min

The Freeze Response, Gifted Kid Syndrome, and BPD: July Mailbag

The Freeze Response, Gifted Kid Syndrome, and BPD: July Mailbag

Dr. Rick and Forrest answer listener questions about perfectionism, performance anxiety, trauma, and relationships. They explore how early praise for being “gifted” can create a fear of failure and co...

14 Heinä 20251h 17min

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