We Need Therapy

"Apparently something is going to happen at the end of this episode that goes on into Season 5. And they never show any of it. So I'm gonna unlock that little tea!" promises Christi, and deliver she will as our beautiful Bitches round the corner into the second half of "The Understudies".The ALDC arrives at Sheer Talent greeted by Cathy's lovely insults over the intercom. Abby is already frustrated enough with Cathy and, as if pre-ordained, announces Maddie will be performing her solo despite Jill's best efforts to get Kendall the spotlight. Cathy's only competition for Maddie is Gino, despite the two being in separate age categories so are they really competing? And does it really matter if Cathy seems bent on sabotaging Gino's chances by putting him in THAT outfit?The rest of the moms are fed up with their daughters being sidelined and an argument erupts over the white board tallies. Abby does not like her methods being questioned and argues the moms never complained about it before the show... despite her teaching style and time commitment with these girls being completely different at this time! Christi points out that the rest of the girls are used as fodder to prop up Maddie, and Abby silently storms out. Seemingly in retaliation, she pulls the group number from the competition, leaving only Maddie's solo as the sole ALDC performance of the evening. But is that what really happened? Did Abby go to such lengths over a petty argument? Surely there have been more severe fights at this point that never warranted such measures. Could it be that Abby was actually afraid to lose to Cathy? Well thankfully we have the Producer's Notes to shed some light on the situation!Quotes“You know why I had detention? Why? Guess. Talking too much? Yes, of course." (18:06-18:12 | Christi & Kelly)“I don't remember any of this, I must have been drinking in a corner. Just praying to make it end. Like please make the day go faster!" (29:57-30:05 | Christi)“You said your kids succeed on the backs of our kids. Because in order for your kids to be the winners, our kids have to be the losers. That right there, that sentence, is Dance Moms in a nutshell." (33:55-34:06 | Christi & Kelly)“This was so stupid, we went this whole weekend for Maddie to do a dance. That's it!" (54:14-54:18 | Christi)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

18 Elo 1h 9min

"No one from Dance Moms has ever talked about this, so this is like real behind the scenes tea." remarks Christi, so you know it's going to be a must-listen. But even more enticing is the fact that Kelly's back! And just in time to cover the first half of "The Understudies" as Abby's continued insults results in the moms keeping a running tally.After Maddie's surprise solo appearance at last week's competition, Abby sticks her right back at the top of the pyramid. Abby could have given Nia (who led the group to 1st) the top spot but some habits die hard I guess. Abby is more preoccupied with the fact the ALDC is facing off against Cathy's Candy Apples this week and her star player is preoccupied with other media appearances. Just in case Maddie's schedule might wisk her away to Miami, Chloe and Kendall are assigned as her understudies. Chloe also gets the rough end of Abby's barbs during group rehearsal after coming to practice injured, but there's also more to that story the cameras couldn't capture.Of course Abby doesn't miss a chance to brag about Maddie's good fortune, but her bragging quickly leads to more insults towards the other girls. Fed up with the negative comparisons to Maddie, the moms begin a running tally of how often each girl get unfavorably compared to her. But after production supplies a physical scoreboard for the mom to mark-up, Abby quickly catches on and things unsurprisingly begin to spiral.Quotes“You're allowed to take some days off, you have some built up PTO. you went through an entire year and a half of cancer and never missed a podcast!" (09:43-09:51 | Christi)“My favorite pill story is when you took all your pills in the back of the van with a big chug of vodka on accident. I might jsut have to start doing that, make it easier to take them!" (18:47-19:03 | Christi & Kelly)“They had taken, and are you ready for this because I'm not exaggerating vials of blood that day." (34:28-20:22 | Christi)“Are we cheesy? I guess so! I didn't know!" (41:33-41:36 | Christi & Kelly)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

11 Elo 1h 11min

"In the words of the infamous Abby Lee Miller, the show must go on!" laments Christi, as it's another week at the Barre without our illustrious Bitch #2.Unfortunately Kelly is back in the hospital this week; we're wishing her a speedy recovery as always. But in the meantime we want to keep the lights on at the Barre so we can continue to help support Kelly as best we can. So while we organize and bring on some additional guests, Intern Matt has continued to sort through all your comments to find the best questions for Christi to answer for an impromptu Q&A. During our last Q&A we managed to get some pretty juicy tea out of Christi, will this batch hold such riches?More importantly, will Matt find a way around his supposed potty mouth? Actually, does Matt really have that much more of a potty mouth than our beloved Bitches!? Some of you seem to think so it seems! So let's see if the good Dr. cant strike a balance between holy s**t and gee willickers!Quotes“Matt made a powerpoint yesterday and sent it to me. It is not fit for public consumption." (04:14-04:21 | Christi)“So there's this person I used to know named Abby. Couldn't guess who she was. I had to change her name in my phone as "Zabby" because I would go to put something in and undoubtedly she would come up first all the time and I almost... and I probably did, send her some texts that were not for her eyes." (06:57-07:18 | Christi & Matt)“I'm sure somewhere there is footage if Kelly peeing in the parking lot." (20:17-20:22 | Christi)“Dance Moms didn't have a gentle decline. It literally got to the top and suddenly it all sucked." (56:10-56:17 | Christi)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

4 Elo 59min

"I can't imagine you're watching Dance Moms every night, you know for fun!" Christi remarks to Ed Phelan, an OG Dance Moms choreographer who returns to the Barre this week after a two year hiatus to check-in on Christi and Kelly as they tackle Season 4's "No More Crybabies". With Nationals quickly approaching Abby begins to shift focus on to who will be getting solos and whose going to be left on the sidelines. She assigns Mackenzie, Select team member Tea, and Sarah H solos to see who will get cut from consideration. Though Abby does Sarah H no favors by giving her a dance centered around the Holocaust of all things! It wasn't about that once the episode aired, but it must have been fun explaining that one to the kids!But Abby is more worried about the fact the ALDC is slated to compete against Ava at this week's competition, which inspires the classic Abby move of, "What if I surprise added Maddie to the line-up?!" which she's certain everyone will like! Shockingly Maddie's inclusion doesn't earn Abby any goodwill, and instead works to only encourage the other moms to turn on Melissa who allowed her other daughter to be upstaged.Quotes“It was the ugliest menagerie of clothing I've ever seen. But I digress, that's every week." (18:21-18:26 | Christi)“It was nice to see her in a shirt that wasn't black with blue writing. It was blue with black writing! I was like oh we're expanding!" (23:20-23:25 | Christi)“This is giving Schindler's List." (32:49-32:51 | Christi)“I don't think anybody should be demonstrating a temper tantrum more than Abby Lee Miller." (47:26-47:32 | Christi)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

28 Heinä 1h 30min

"Kelly is grounded until further notice," commands Christi, and with good reason. Unfortunately not long after recording our last episode, Kelly found herself back in the hospital dealing with another medical emergency. So in the spirit of keeping her healthy she'll be taking this week off while we do a Q&A! Covering for Kelly this week is Intern Matt, who has scoured through all of your messages to try and formulate an ideal Christi Q&A for you all. No duds, we promise!Topics include everything from which cast member does Christi wish never entered the picture, thoughts on Holly and Jill sticking it out until the end of the she, and even more tea that has yet to be spilt after 4 seasons of episodes! Tune-in for these topics and much more on a very entertaining trip to the Barre.Quotes“Kelly is one tough bitch." (05:24-05:26 | Christi)“See here I am, Saint Christi, absolving people of their sins. Now if only somebody would extend the same courtesy to me.” (26:57-27:03 | Christi)“This is the most in-depth question we've done so far. Right, because I've never thought about sleeping with the Dance Moms! Sorry, all these other questions I know the answer to!" (43:14-43:23 | Matt & Christi)“I said to Jill that I could not heat The Wobble without thinking of her. And she goes, is it because they say "Big Girl"? No!" (54:15-54:26 | Kelly)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

21 Heinä 1h 9min

"The good news is I'm a giant twat in this episode. You didn't look very happy."That's right bitches, we're back! Kelly is on her road to recovery (no fun at all if you ask us), and we're back with a full breakdown of "Chloe Gets Revenge". This week Abby is pitting the ALDC's two teams against each other once again, but she's switching up the formula. Chloe is transferred to the Select Team and the OG's gain Jade. But Abby of course has no intention of letting Chloe win and steal the limelight from Maddie, and it starts to become clear to the Select Team for the first time that maybe Abby doesn't have their best interests at heart. This becomes even more apparent int he solo categories where Ava gets saddled with an unruly prop that tanks any possibility of her competing fairly with Maddie. To further boost Maddie's profile, Abby brings on Rachel sage to present Maddie with a new original song written specifically for her... except it wasn't written for her as that's just another classic lie to help juice Abby's ego. But will all this pay off for Abby, or will the Select Team prevail for a third week... and actually should it even matter to Abby as long as she has a winning team? Quotes“I was getting a sponge bath at 3:30 in the morning! I looked at this bitch and I'm like, you know what? You don't know me very well. Like I could go a week without taking a shower and not give a shit, and you're in here at three in the morning! Come back and lets talk at eleven." (05:01-05:20 | Kelly)“You edit me to be your asshole Lifetime.” (17:49-17:51 | Christi)“Christy was there the entire time. They edited her out, her and Sarah." (20:06-20:11 | Christi)“I just feel like if I was a dance teacher, it would be a cold day in hell before I would be going on national television and saying, 'Hey my studio! I'll teach your kids, but I'm going to take my kid to go learn from Abby Lee Miller!'" (41:30-41:45 | Kelly)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

14 Heinä 1h 25min

This week as Kelly continues to recover from her recent surgery, we here at Back to the Barre wanted to find something to lighten the mood a little. Well knowing our fanbase fairly well by this point we know it's always fun to listen to the moms scream at, yell at, or fight one another! Four seasons in and we've gotten quite good at it with alarming reliability, but what are the cream of the crop fights? Well we've decided to round up our best Dance Moms fight segments into one episode for a special Clip Show-edition of Back to the Barre.We have fights that go all the way back to Episode 1, when Minister Dawn was stirring up trouble. But what Season had the most classic fights? And more importantly, which one was the most quotable? Tune-in to find out!Quotes“Your job is not to talk to her. Your job is to talk to Abby. Period." (04:30-04:33 | Christi)“I don't know anybody who would have been in that situation who wouldn't have said f**k you Abby, you ust threw a chair at my daughter!” (18:29-18:36 | Kelly)“Jill, you can't tell somebody to grow up and get a life when you just chased and dumped water one someone." (30:48-30:53 | Christi)“She should have kept me. I wasn't that embarrassing I think." (48:23-48:26 | Kelly)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

7 Heinä 1h 9min

Join us on Patreon for the After Party and much more!This week Kelly is recovering from a recent surgery, so we'd thought it be fun in the meantime to release another classic Back to the Barre After Party! This After Party was attached to our episode "Paige Doesn't Have Rabies!" which covered Season 2 Episode 18. Topics include what drinks were really in those cups (or better yet what was in the McDonalds cups), Mardi Gras, and the origin of our Favorite Dance segment!Quotes“You said we need a burner phone. We do! I've watched a lot of Law & Order, I know how that s**t works." (03:34-03:43 | Christi & Kelly)“I was like do you know about Candy Apples? You mean that they're delicious!? And I was like no...” (07:46-07:53 | Christi)“We need to put out a drinking calendar for the masses. We need to do our public service." (10:01-10:06 | Christi)“If there was a martini sitting there at 7:30 in the morning I know it's not gonna be a good day." (19:01-19:08 | Kelly)LinksSubscribe to us on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC50aSBAYXH_9yU2YkKyXZ0w Subscribe to our Patreon: www.patreon.com/backtothebarreThank you to Ashley Jana for allowing us to use Electricity!! Follow her on IG HERE: https://instagram.com/ashleyjanamusic?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Download Electricity HERE: https://music.apple.com/us/album/electricity/1497482509?i=1497482510Follow Christi on IG: www.instagram.com/christilukasiakFollow Kelly on IG: www.instagram.com/kellylhyland Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

30 Kesä 34min