Living Alone, One Year Later

Since the #MeToo movement, the presence of intimacy coordinators have become more common on movie and TV sets. In this episode, Elle McAlpine the intimacy coordinator for many projects including Poor Things and Baby Reindeer, talks about what her job entails, from choreographing the perfect orgasm to navigating tricky workplace dynamics. Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Heinä 202442min

Anna talks to Dr. Orna Guralnik, the psychoanalyst from Showtime’s Couples Therapy, and then to Kara Swisher, the pugnacious tech journalist and podcast host, about the art of the interview, and how they get people to open up to them.  Kara Swisher’s new book is Burn Book: A Tech Love Story, and you can read her 1989 Washington Post article here. This episode is from a live conversation, earlier this month, at the Tribeca Festival. It was produced by Slate’s Katie Rayford and Alexandra Cohl and Tribeca Festival’s Davy Gardner, with help from Zoe Azulay and Cameron Drews. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

25 Kesä 20241h 14min

Mark Duplass’s first big dream came true when he was 28: a movie he wrote and directed with his brother, Jay, got into The Sundance Film Festival. It was a major accomplishment, but Mark was miserable. “The week after Sundance was probably one of the worst weeks of my life because I realized I hit the top of the mountain. The top of the mountain didn't make me happy. So now what am I going to do?” In this episode, filmmaker Mark Duplass talks about managing depression, what it’s like to have a creative partnership with his brother, and how they talk about making and spending money. “If I didn't have Jay as a partner, I would make a hundred mediocre movies a year, and if he didn't have me, he would die with two thirds of the greatest film ever made, not finished.” Read: With Hollywood shedding jobs, here is help for coping with the slowdown Podcast production by Andrew Dunn Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

18 Kesä 202453min

Christopher Zara didn’t finish high school, and can sometimes feel like an outsider working in a field where it’s more common to have a college degree. Sometimes he’s able to push through his social anxiety, to put on a tough face. But other times his body won’t give him a chance to feel at ease – it seizes up, and in Christopher’s case that means not being able to pee even when he really, really has to.   “Imagine you’re unable to perform a basic function like move your hand or your leg,” Christopher said, “You're standing, in my case, in front of a urinal or wherever the bathroom is, and it just doesn't happen.” In this episode, Christopher talks to producer Zoe Azulay about “paruresis,” more colloquially known as shy bladder syndrome, how it’s been disruptive to his life, how he thinks it's connected to class anxiety, and how it’s gotten better.  Christopher Zara’s memoir is called Uneducated: A Memoir of Flunking Out, Falling Apart, and Finding My Worth Podcast production by Zoe Azulay Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

11 Kesä 202444min

Elissa Strauss always knew she wanted to be a mother, but she also knew she didn’t want motherhood to take over her personality. After all, she had spent years as a blogger making fun of anyone who took motherhood too seriously. She bemoaned the natural birth movement and people who made “mom friends.” Then Elissa had a son, and her view of caretaking started to shift. “I had put so much energy into figuring out how not to lose myself to caregiving,” Elissa writes in her new book, “that I completely ignored the possibility that I might, in fact, find some of myself there.” In this episode, Anna and Elissa talk about why it feels uncool to talk about liking motherhood, the ways caretaking can take from us, but also how it can fill us up and engender “moral transformation.” Plus, the economics of care, and what really valuing care in society would look like.  Elissa’s book is called When You Care: the Unexpected Magic of Caring for Others. She also wrote a piece last month in Slate called “It’s Weird Times to Be a Happy Mother.”   Are you a paid caregiver? We want to hear from you for a future listener episode. Tell us some things you’ve taken away from the experience – wild stories, observations about class, lessons about the way you want your own loved ones to be cared for. Send us your thoughts and stories at deathsexmoney@slate.com.  Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

4 Kesä 202447min

The dating app Bumble recently declared in advertisements that “a vow of celibacy is not the answer.” The ad campaign, which was met with a swift backlash, seemed to be responding to a prevailing notion that people are having less sex than they used to. Back in 2015, we asked our listeners why they weren’t having sex, and their reasons varied. Disability, religious beliefs, S.T.I.s, and differing libidos were all cited as factors. This week, we revisit those stories and reflect on sex and abstinence at a time when those things continue to spark debate. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Touko 202436min

In our episode with Jim Harris, we talked about how a spinal cord injury left him partially paralyzed, and then how 8 months into his recovery he regained some lost sensation and movement after taking psilocybin at a music festival. When we recorded, we talked for a long time….right up to when his window of availability was closing.  But as I wrapped up and got ready to say goodbye, he said: can I ask you a few questions? It was interesting to hear what he was wondering about after I’d asked him questions for such a long stretch. So we kept talking… and we thought we’d share that with you too.  Podcast production by Andrew Dunn. This episode is member-exclusive. Listen to it now by subscribing to Slate Plus. By joining, not only will you unlock this episode, but you’ll also access ad-free listening across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of our show page. Or, visit slate.com/dsmplus to get access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

24 Touko 20243min

Before going on a kite-skiing trip to the Chilean mountains, Jim Harris and his longtime girlfriend broke up. She wanted to settle down, and he wanted to keep adventuring. On that trip, Jim broke his back and became paralyzed. After eight months of non-stop physical therapy his progress seemed to be stalled until one night at a concert he took magic mushrooms and noticed new movement in muscles that hadn’t worked since his accident. In this episode, Anna and Jim talk about his process of recovery, finding new identity, relationships, and ways to adventure and explore.  You can see Jim’s art and a portfolio of his wilderness adventures at PerpetualWeekend.com, and we first heard about Jim from an article in Outside Magazine.   Podcast production by Andrew Dunn. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 Touko 202448min