Kathrine Aspaas. Emosjonell styrketrening og sårbarhet som styrke. Masker, skam og at alle er “needy”. Fordommer rundt jenter som går i kjole og rosa. Episode 9

Kathrine Aspaas. Emosjonell styrketrening og sårbarhet som styrke. Masker, skam og at alle er “needy”. Fordommer rundt jenter som går i kjole og rosa. Episode 9

I episode 9 og 10 snakker jeg med modige, morsomme og ærlige Kathrine Aspaas. Kathrine jobbet som finans journalist og kommentator for Aftenposten i 25 år før hun tok en helomvending inn i jakten på følelsenes plass i samfunnet og livene våre. I dag er hun grunder (digitalt treningsstudio: Bli emosjonelt sterk), foredragsholder, TEDx- speaker, blogger på The Huffington Post, musiker og forfatter (Den Emosjonelle Revolusjonen, Rosa er den nye pønken og Raushetens tid).

Ifølge seg selv var Kathrine i 2010 en rasjonell, ufeilbarlig, sint, skråsikker, hardtarbeidende, suksessfull, klandrende, ensom, fortapt, og følelsesløs karrierekvinne. Kathrine var topptrent til å hevde seg i konkurransesamfunnet: Høyt utdannet, en skarp penn, gode analyser. Hun ble lest, sett og hørt. Da hun 1.juledag i 2010 dumpet borti Brene Browns TED-talk “Kraften av sårbarheten” ble hun målløs. Hun forsto ikke helt hva det var, men skjønte at dette var noe hun ville forstå mer av og at dette var noe hun selv hadde behov for i livet sitt.

Det at forskningen viser at de lykkeligste menneskene er de som er takknemlige og anerkjenner at de selv (og alle mennesker rundt dem) er uperfekte, sårbare og gjør sitt beste var kanskje det motsatte av det Kathrine hadde lært på økonomistudiene og som finansjournalist. Det er den mest interessante forskningen hun har vært borti, kanskje spesielt fordi svarene er rake motsetningen av det som fremheves i media, fagmiljøer og på sosiale medier som fasiten på et lykkelig liv. Hun selv hadde tross alt sett på sårbarhet, skam og følelser som svakhet. Hun hadde gjort alt hun kunne for å bli en av gutta, for det å være jentete var jo sett på som svakt, flåsete, lite intelligent, dårlig.. (Jepp, det blir det!) Hvorfor er det sånn at jenter som liker å pynte seg eller gå rosa sees på som lite intelligente og sliter med å bli tatt seriøst? Kan det være noen fordommer vi ikke har vært bevisste? Jeg skal ærlig innrømme at jeg er blant dem som helt ubevisst har tenkt på den måten.

Kathrine ønsker å bidra til et modigere, rausere og mer autentisk samfunn, hvor vi tør å være oss selv og aksepterer andre for den de er. Hvor vi tenker at “det er ikke så rart” når noen går på trynet og velger å hjelpe dem heller enn å rakke ned på dem. Et samfunn hvor vi eier følelsene våre og bruker dem til å gjøre oss sterke, heller enn et samfunn hvor vi fortrenger følelser slik at de forfølger oss og gjør oss mentalt ustabile.

Jeg og Kathrine snakker om hennes reise og reisen samfunnet er på. En reise fra fokus på tall og penger til fokus på mennesker og miljø. Hun brenner for hvordan vi mennesker behandler oss selv og hverandre. Hennes råd til et bedre liv er å; være til stede, prøve og feile, ta ansvar for egne følelser, være nysgjerrig, være åpen, praktisere takknemlighet, vise ømhet for seg selv og andre, lytte, løfte frem andre, dyrke gode og nære relasjoner, utføre meningsfylt arbeid, og slutte å sammenligne deg med andre.

Kathrine videreformidler og anvender Brene Browns forskning med gjennomføringsevne og lidenskap. Jeg ønsker meg flere som Kathrine, som tør å skape en idè rundt og formidle forskning som utfordrer etablerte sannheter i samfunnet. På denne måten ser jeg hvordan Kathrine aktivt bidrar til en positiv utvikling i samfunnet. Jeg heier på deg, Kathrine, du er viktig og jeg setter enormt pris på alt du gjør, har gjort og har stått i. Det bidrar til at folk som meg blir mer komfortable med å være oss selv. Du er blant de modigste personene jeg vet om!

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Attachment Styles Uncovered: How Anxious & Avoidant Patterns Shape Our Work, Money, Family, and Dating. Episode 103

Attachment Styles Uncovered: How Anxious & Avoidant Patterns Shape Our Work, Money, Family, and Dating. Episode 103

Are you aware of your attachment style?  Anxious, avoidant, anxious avoidant or secure.  67% of the population is anxious, avoidant or anxiously avoidant... That is the majority.  This subconsciously impact all aspects of our lives. Our relationship to everything from relationships, dating, work, money, hobbies, exercise or making things happen.    I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese  https://youtu.be/dVvljWnerfo    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.    #anxious #avoident #attachment #money #dating #peoplepleasing #codependency

17 Helmi 202520min

Body scan meditation with meditative music. Land back into your body. Mindfulness. Episode 102

Body scan meditation with meditative music. Land back into your body. Mindfulness. Episode 102

Calm your mind and body with a calming body scan meditation with zen music.  Feel into where you are right now, observere and let yourself ground into a calm nervous system.    I am Therese Fallentin and this is the gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.    #meditation #mindfulness #bodyscan #grounding #calming #somaticwork

14 Helmi 202528min

Perfectionism, avoidance, control and how it distracts us from going for what we want. Episode 101

Perfectionism, avoidance, control and how it distracts us from going for what we want. Episode 101

Do you allow yourself to practice, play, look stupid, let go of control, show vulnerability, surrender, feel, ask for help, loooooooose control?  Perfectionism creates avoidance. It's control.  It's trying to be perfect so that noone can reject you, critique you, control you.  Well, being perfect is also not perfect, it's quite exhausting for yourself and everyone else.  Breath, let go and let people in. Let yourself have a break.    I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese  https://youtu.be/vZQbeNOsOmc    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.    #anxious #avoident #attachment #money #perfectionism #avoidance #control #goals #surrender

13 Helmi 202515min

Perpetrators. Bully, gossip, blame, shame, critique. How and why we all enter the perpetrator role. Why and how to change into a challenger. Episode 100

Perpetrators. Bully, gossip, blame, shame, critique. How and why we all enter the perpetrator role. Why and how to change into a challenger. Episode 100

Have you ever gossiped, judged, criticized, blamed, shamed, pointed fingers, hit, punched, pushed or bullied someone else?  If you answer no, I don’t believe you!  We ALL HAVE!  If you claim you haven’t, I am quite sure you have more than most. Start digging, get real! Even if you think you are an angel, you probably aren’t.  So why and how do we ALL turn into perpetrators? How does it look like? Perpetrators come alongside victims and rescuers. And within this dynamics WE SWOP ROLES WITHIN A SINGLE CONVERSATION. We start out as the victim, move into to perpetrator and end up as the rescuer. And so it rolls.  We believe we are angels, but really! We are not. No one is. I explain how toxic these dynamics are and how to get out of them. How to take accountability for your own life, words and actions.  Why?  Because you are hurting yourself. You are creating your own drama. You are getting yourself into dynamics you don’t want to be in.  Watch/ listen into my podcast to learn how you can become the challenger, coach and creator - instead of the perpetrator, rescuer and victim… These are the Drama Triangle and Empowerment Dynamics.  Someone focusing on everyone else’s problems and never your own. Not trusting in anyone else to do a good enough job. Watch/ listen into the episode to learn how to stop burning out. How to get help, how to cut back on responsibilities. how to find time for the things YOU wanna do.   I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese  https://youtu.be/0D6dnrOfYWU    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.    #dramatriangle #empowermentdynamics #power #empowered #stepintoyourpower #create #entrepreneurship #goals #prioritze #focus #discipline #victimhoodrole #confidence #attract #magnetic #accountability #dopaminaddiction #perpetrator #challenger #coach #rescuer #victimrole #hero

11 Helmi 202532min

Stop burning out, fixing the world, rescuing people and pleasing people. Believe people are capable. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 99

Stop burning out, fixing the world, rescuing people and pleasing people. Believe people are capable. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 99

Burned out? Tired? Empty? Exhausted? Anxious? Worried? Never time, energy, focus and money left to yourself? Always someone else who needs you more than you? No one else manage to help you. Everyone else does a poor job. You are always stuck with the work. Sounds like you are a rescuer, a fixer. Someone focusing on everyone else’s problems and never your own. Not trusting in anyone else to do a good enough job. Watch/ listen into the episode to learn how to stop burning out. How to get help, how to cut back on responsibilities. how to find time for the things YOU wanna do.   I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese  https://youtu.be/enug_nvLcyk    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.    #dramatriangle #empowermentdynamics #power #empowered #stepintoyourpower #create #entrepreneurship #goals #prioritze #focus #discipline #victimhoodrole #confidence #attract #magnetic #accountability #dopaminaddiction #rescuer #victimrole #hero

11 Helmi 202540min

Acting like a victim isn't attractive. Take accountability and stop complaining, blaming, pointing fingers. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 98

Acting like a victim isn't attractive. Take accountability and stop complaining, blaming, pointing fingers. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 98

Do you want something in your life?  Well, then go make it happen.  Get up, get out, start making a plan, doing research, taking accountability for your non-doing, your own actions, your own choices.. HOW YOU SHOW UP IN THE WORLD.  You want something, well, then start MAKING SOME ACTION. Get of your phone, your screen, your couch.  Stop distracting yourself with shiny unicorns.  Get real. Be honest with yourself.  WHAT IS WITHIN YOUR POWER TO CHANGE IS YOU AND YOUR OWN THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS.  You don't want to attract and get from "poor me" attitude. It's not poor you. You are capable, YOU ARE! Just freaking start.  DOING SOMETHING.... AnYtHiNg that will take you closer to where you want to be. Probably more confident in one way or the other. Well, how do you build that confidence within YOU?  Find a coach, take a class, go dancing, read a book on the topic, go for a walk, write, ask people for their insights and knowledge (not for them to do the work and rescue you... Again, not very sexy...)  I know you can. We all can.  And now is the time. The best time of them all. Cut the crap. The excuses and bullshit. YOU CAN, if you really want to. That is.     I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://youtu.be/ymvzNOQDSFU    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.        #dramatriangle #empowermentdynamics #power #empowered #stepintoyourpower #create #entrepreneurship #goals #prioritze #focus #discipline #victimhoodrole #confidence #attract #magnetic #accountability #dopaminaddiction

11 Helmi 202524min

Victimhood role in women vs men. Build inner confidence and become attractive. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 97

Victimhood role in women vs men. Build inner confidence and become attractive. Drama triangle vs Empowerment Dynamics. Episode 97

What is your excuse for not creating your life? For not taking accountability for yourself?  Feel hopeless, powerless, not able, incapable, that nothing works, that it's not possible for you? Just cannot?  Not enough money, time, energy, IQ, EQ.  Not good enough body, looks, brains...  Nobody gets you.  Nobody wants you.  You need someone to come fix you, rescue you. Preferably someone successful, pretty, amazing....  Whatever.  Well, sounds like you indulge yourself inside the victimhood role and I am here to tell you how you throw away your potential, your inner strength and possibilities.  Change your mindset and set yourself free.  From "I cannot" to "I can".. You freaking can. You have it all inside of you. Find it. Digg it out. Stop waiting to be rescued. Stop putting people on pedestals. Stop looking down on yourself.  IT'S NOT SEXY! IT'S NOT ATTRACTIVE. Find ways to start believing in yourself.   I am Therese Fallentin and this is The Gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://youtu.be/ymvzNOQDSFU    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.        #dramatriangle #empowermentdynamics #power #empowered #stepintoyourpower #create #entrepreneurship #goals #prioritze #focus #discipline #victimhoodrole #confidence #attract #magnetic

11 Helmi 202536min

Prioritize, focus and work towards your own goals, not whatever will make people like you. Episode 96

Prioritize, focus and work towards your own goals, not whatever will make people like you. Episode 96

When did you last work towards YOUR own goal?  Something you want to do, that other people might not understand.  Not to get approval, attention, likes, compliments.  Simply because it feels like what YOU want to do.  When did you last say no, and prioritized your time, money and energy towards your own yes.  Where is your focus?  What do you prioritize?  Be honest with yourself.    I am Therese Fallentin and this is the gutfeeling podcast. You can read about me and the Podcast at https://magefolelsen.com/hjem    and about me and my services (waiting for my domain :-D) at https://herring-tambourine-n2td.squarespace.com/    and find me in video format at youtube at https://www.youtube.com/@TheGutFeeling_Therese    Make yourself a glorious day ya all.        #dramatriangle #empowermentdynamics #power #empowered #stepintoyourpower #create #entrepreneurship #goals #prioritze #focus #discipline

10 Helmi 202538min

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