#68 - Overcoming Perfectionism

#68 - Overcoming Perfectionism

Perfectionism is Paralyzing The pressure to be perfect infuses every aspect of our lives: From our homes to our jobs to our appearance to our kids we can feel driven to perform perfectly. Trying to do your best and excel is not a bad thing in itself. The problem arises when anything LESS than perfection is unacceptable. Of course we understand intellectually that being perfect all the time is impossible. But that doesn't change the grinding feelings of anxiety, failure and fear of judgment that rear up when we don't live up to our own expectations. If you are vulnerable to perfectionism you run yourself absolutely ragged attempting to live up to some impossible standard. But then messy, freewheeling life inevitably sideswipes your efforts. Your dinner party fails to meet your Pinterest-worthy standards, your garden is a weedy mess, your kids are grubby, or you're late again... and a black hole of guilt and shame rises up inside you, making it difficult to enjoy the beauty and goodness that also exists in your imperfect world. Many people who struggle perfectionism are incredibly competent, thoughtful, and thorough in everything that they do. However they can put SO much time and energy over-focusing on small details, it can make even the simplest projects seem overwhelming. The result, ironically, is procrastination, which leads to not having enough time to do a good job, which leads to more imperfection and feelings of shame and failure. If perfectionism gets too powerful it can lead to total avoidance of tasks: Piles of unfolded laundry, tons of clutter, unfinished household projects, and even serious problems at work or school are the hallmarks of a severe case of perfectionism. 3 Keys to Overcoming Perfectionism The good news? Perfectionism CAN be overcome. I know this, because in addition to working with many people who have struggled with and conquered perfectionism, I'm a perfectionist (in recovery) myself. This episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is all about how to help you overcome the anxiety and self-judgment that leads to perfectionism, and start enjoying you're life again. (And being more successful, productive and effective in the process). Listen and learn the three new ideas that will help you overcome perfectionism: Can you relate to perfectionism? Is it something that you're currently struggling with, or something that you've already overcome? Either way, I hope you share your story in the comment section of this post! http://www.growingself.com/overcoming-perfectionism/ -- xo, Lisa Marie

Jaksot(467)

#376 - Communication Issues? What to Do!

#376 - Communication Issues? What to Do!

Are communication issues making your relationship feel hard? Most couples who arrive in couples counseling tell me that they want to improve communication in their relationships. The tricky part is knowing what's at the root of "communication issues," which can have so many causes, from people pleasing, to emotional reactivity, to defensiveness. Usually the answer is a combination.  If you would like a new perspective on communication challenges, this episode is for you. I hope you find it helpful.  Love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. — If you would like support from a good couples counselor to improve communciation in your relationship, schedule a free consultation: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/

20 Marras 20231h 9min

#375 - What to Do When Your Partner Pulls Away

#375 - What to Do When Your Partner Pulls Away

Is your partner pulling away? It can be an unnerving experience, especially when you don't know why your partner seems checked out lately. But you can use this as an opportunity to gain clarity about how your partner is feeling in your relationship and start a conversation that brings you closer today.  Join me for a discussion all about what to do when your partner pulls away. You'll learn about some of the common reasons that people grow emotionally distant in their relationships, how to start the conversation, and how to address some of the root issues before they pose a threat to your relationship.  I hope you'll find it helpful.  Love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. — If you are ready to get support from a really good marriage counselor, schedule a free consultation with a Growing Self couples therapist: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/

13 Marras 20231h 2min

#374 - How to Develop a Secure Attachment Style

#374 - How to Develop a Secure Attachment Style

Having a secure attachment style allows you to feel close and connected to others, while keeping your emotional independence and sense of self firmly intact. But if you weren't lucky enough to develop a secure attachment style as a child, how can you become securely attached as an adult?  Luckily, there are some effective strategies for "earning" secure attachment, and this episode will show you the way. I am discussing the qualities of a securely attached person and the steps you can take to address your attachment patterns and gain connection and freedom.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby  P.S. — If you would like support in becoming more securely attached, schedule a free consultation with an attachment-informed clinician on my team: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/

6 Marras 20231h 5min

#373 - Breaking Free from Old Relationship Patterns

#373 - Breaking Free from Old Relationship Patterns

Do you have habitual ways of showing up in your relationships that feel hard to change? We all do! Old relationship patterns are at the root of so many struggles, from dating emotionally unavailable partners, to feeling mistreated again and again. Getting clear about what your relationship patterns are is the first step in shifting them, so you can have a better experience and create the love and connection you deserve.  If you want to learn how to break free from old relationship patterns, this episode is for you! I hope you'll find it helpful.  Love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. — If you are interested in doing this work with a Growing Self clinician, start by scheduling a free consultation: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/

30 Loka 202350min

#372 - How to Stop Overthinking feat. Dr. John Delony

#372 - How to Stop Overthinking feat. Dr. John Delony

There are few things worse than wishing you could stop ruminating about the past or worrying about the future, and not knowing how. Rumination happens when our minds aren’t at peace with not having all the answers. You’ll chew on a painful memory, a lost relationship, or an uncertain future, trying to find solve the problem or find “the answer” that will make it all make sense.  Unfortunately, there is no benefit to rumination. It's not productive problem solving. All rumination does is add to your anxiety, drain your energy, and often, make you feel bad about yourself.  So, how can you put an end to the obsessive, repetitive thoughts? This on "How to Stop Ruminating" will help! My guest is Dr. John Delony, a mental health expert, author, and host of The Dr. John Delony Show. He’s sharing some of his top tips from his own research and life experience on how to stop ruminating, once and for all.  I hope you’ll join us! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com  Start your journey of growth today: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/

23 Loka 202359min

#371 - How to Get Out of Your Own Way

#371 - How to Get Out of Your Own Way

What’s standing in between you and your most important goals? It might not be what you think.  In this episode you'll learn about the hidden, inner obstacles that most of us face, and that can become barriers to our self actualization unless we know how to handle them. Today, you'll get insight into yourself, learn how to get out of your own way, and how to make the shifts that will help you create the love, happiness, and success that you deserve — with special guest, Dr. Sophie Mort.  I hope you’ll join us!  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com PS: I have SO much more support for your growth and personal evolution: tons of free resources, articles, and podcast playlists, all for you, on the blog at GrowingSelf.com

16 Loka 202352min

#370 - Low Sex Drive Ruining Your Relationship? What to do!

#370 - Low Sex Drive Ruining Your Relationship? What to do!

Is low sex drive ruining your relationship? All long term couples experience sexual dry spells, whether it's due to stress, hormonal changes, emotional disconnection, or simply being too tired to get frisky at the end of a long day (pro tip: sex does not have to happen at bed time!).  Luckily, it doesn't matter how often you're "doing it" — what matters is that you and your partner know how to navigate periods of low sex drive while keeping your relationship healthy and strong.  It's totally possible, and this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success podcast will show you the way! My guests are Vanessa and Xander Marin, authors of "Sex Talks: The 5 Conversations that Will Transform Your Love Life." Vanessa is a sex therapist, and along with her partner Xander, she's sharing her top tips for keeping low sex drive from ruining your relationship — and for reigniting your sexual spark. I hope you'll join us! xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby https://www.growingself.com/  Ps: Ready to transform your relationship? Let's talk: https://www.growingself.com/schedule-free-consultation/  ------

9 Loka 202359min

#369 - How to Talk to Your Partner about Couples Counseling

#369 - How to Talk to Your Partner about Couples Counseling

Is it time to have “The Talk?” Getting into couples counseling may be the best choice you ever make for your relationship… but first, you have to talk to your partner about going to couples counseling, and that can be tricky.  This podcast is about how you can approach this conversation in a way that gives you the best shot at getting your relationship the help it needs. I hope you’ll join me! With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

2 Loka 20231h 6min

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