Race & Kink w/Luna Matatas - Ep 186

Having difficult conversations with one partner is hard enough. When consensual non-monogamy is part of the equation it can feel overwhelming. In this episode, therapist Kate Loree gives insight and actionable strategies for working through uncomfortable emotions in polyamory/CNM like jealousy, envy, insecurity, and feeling disempowered. She also provides valuable tips on identifying & managing triggers with our partners and metamours. Some of what we touch on: Attachment injury Triggers Grounding techniques Getting into your "resilient zone" The EPIC communication model Guest Bio – Kate Loree, LMFT Kate Loree, LMFT, is a sex-positive licensed marriage and family therapist with a specialty in non-monogamous, kink, LGBTQ, and sex worker communities. In addition to her master's in marriage and family therapy, she also has an MBA and is a registered art therapist (ATR). She is an EDSE-certified sex educator and an EMDR-certified therapist with additional training in the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM) for the treatment of trauma. She has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003. Kate is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships (release date 4/19/22) and cohosts the sex-positive podcast of the same name, Open Deeply, with Sunny Megatron. She's been featured in Buzzfeed videos, and has guested on Playboy Radio and many podcasts, including American Sex, Sluts and Scholars, and Sex Nerd Sandra. She's written for Good Vibrations, Hollywood Magazine and is a frequent public speaker. Episode 196 Helpful Links & Resources Kate Loree Website: http://kateloree.com Kate Loree Facebook http://facebook.com/kateloreelmft Kate Loree Twitter http://twitter.com/kateloreelmft Kate Loree Instagram http://instagram.com/opendeeplywithkateloree Kate Loree YouTube https://www.youtube.com/kateloree Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships book https://www.amazon.com/dp/164742335X/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_ZHACQ8RJHMR2R9HGHBMY Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Ken Melvoin-Berg's Thunderpants Academy Gaming Page https://www.facebook.com/ThunderpantsAcademy Ken Melvoin-Berg's Twitter https://twitter.com/ThunderpantsDM Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Zipper Magazine website https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Episode 196 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 30-day free trial of Dipsea Stories when you use code SUNNY at http://dipseastories.com/sunny For 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library go to http://CALM.COM/Sunny Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric& http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 10% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetbwith code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactoryand the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter

28 Loka 20221h 9min

Asexuality and kink?! Isn't that a contradiction?! Nope! Asexual BDSM is quite common. In fact, a significant segment of the kink subculture is on the 'ace' spectrum. On ep 195, Evie Lupine joins to talk about it. A few of the things we discuss: Asexuality vs. Responsive Desire & how to tell the difference How someone can be asexual but still have & enjoy sex Why the kink community appeals to many aces What IS sex? Do we have the definition all wrong? The relationship between sex & BDSM + why some allosexuals prefer "platonic kink" How asexuality factors into the "Kink at Pride" discourse & more Are there asexual folks in your community or life that you'd like to understand better? Maybe you've considered this identity for yourself? Does it blow your mind that many ace identified people practice kink & enjoy sex? We cover a lot in this episode that will help you answer those questions! Evie Lupine Bio Evie Lupine is an asexual kink educator and YouTuber that first began her journey into the lifestyle about 7 years ago. In that time, she's been a 24/7 collared submissive, a petplayer, a bondage freak, and an occasional sadist. Her passion for learning as well as her diverse interests within kink naturally led her in the direction of helping others with their own discovery processes. She focuses on supporting folks developing happier, healthier relationships while separating the fantasy from the reality of doing BDSM everyday. Episode 195 Helpful Links & Resources Evie Lupine YouTube https://www.youtube.com/c/EvieLupine Evie Lupine Twitter https://twitter.com/EvieLupine Evie Lupine Patreon https://www.patreon.com/EvieLupine AVEN Forum (Asexual Visibility & Education Network) https://www.asexuality.org/en/ Emily Nagoski Come As You Are (book) https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Come-As-You-Are-Revised-and-Updated/Emily-Nagoski/9781982165314 Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb com https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Episode 195 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 20% off an at-home lab test at http://everlywell.com/sunny For 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library go to http://CALM.COM/Sunny Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric& http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 10% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetbwith code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactoryand the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

14 Loka 20221h 14min

In episode 194 of American Sex Podcast, Sunny Megatron continues her deep dive into the murky, messy, nuances of kink. She examines some of the most popular kink "rules" pertaining to consent & safewords and the grey areas that cause community friction: "Never renegotiate during a scene" "When there's a problem someone will use their safeword" "Never do heavy impact without a warm-up" "Safewords can be abused" "Safewords are for sex and BDSM" This episode will help you diversify what's in your consent toolbox, assess risks in intimate situations, evaluate exceptions to BDSM rules, differentiate personal preferences from useful & inclusive best practices, and more. Sunny Megatron Bio Sunny Megatron is an award-winning BDSM & Certified Sexuality Educator, Certified Relationship Coach, and media personality. She's the host and executive producer of the Showtime original television series, SEX with Sunny Megatron, plus co-hosts AASECT Award-winning American Sex Podcast and Open Deeply Podcast. Sunny was also named XBIZ Sexpert of the Year 2021 and is Editor-in-Chief of kink-focused Zipper Magazine. Known for her one-of-a-kind build-your-own-adventure approach to sex, kink & relationships, Sunny coined the BDSM community catchphrase, Kink is Customizable™. In her sell-out workshops, her unique brand of "edutainment" seamlessly combines her humorous lecturing style, interactive exercises, and the latest sexuality research. Sunny's passion is helping others overcome shame and find power through play and pleasure. Currently, she's working on her first book, "Customizable Kink: A Strategic Guide to Adult Play." Episode 194 Helpful Links & Resources The History of SSC (Safe, Sane & Consensual) vs. RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) https://historyofthedominatrix.com/blogs/blog/the-history-bdsm-consent-ssc-vs-rack Putting SSC in perspective TikTok Video https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron/video/7147630034147233066 Why do many consider SSC harmful and outdated? https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron/video/7016472196205956357 Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Everything You Need to Know About Safewords by Sunny Megatron https://zippermagazine.com/everything-you-need-to-know-about-safewords/ ZipperMagazine.com https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Episode 194 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 30-day free trial of Dipsea Stories when you use code SUNNY at http://dipseastories.com/sunny 20% off an at-home lab test at http://everlywell.com/sunny Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 10% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

30 Syys 20221h 15min

Safe words aren't as deep & complicated as we make them out to be. They aren't necessarily as simple as we think either. In kink & sex, safe words are simple communication tools that stop the action & trigger a predetermined protocol. What they mean, how they're used & what you do after is up to you. How do you decide that? Episode 193 of American Sex Podcast will help you figure it out. This convo was inspired by a listener suggestion to unpack some of the fiercest kink community debates about consent, how BDSM *should* be done, and the customizability of kink. Sunny Megatron explores ways you can evaluate BDSM rules and decide if, when, and how much to customize them to fit your own needs. She does this entirely through the lens of safe words and consent. This is also the first show back from summer hiatus and in the intro, Sunny announces some big changes for the future of both American Sex and their family. Episode 193 Links Everything You Need to Know About Safewords by Sunny Megatron https://zippermagazine.com/everything-you-need-to-know-about-safewords/ Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb ZipperMagazine.com https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Episode 193 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! For 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library go to http://CALM.COM/Sunny 30-day free trial of Dipsea Stories when you use code SUNNY at http://dipseastories.com/sunny 20% off an at-home lab test at http://everlywell.com/sunny Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 10% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

16 Syys 20221h 27min

"The BDSM Test" is infamous in the kink community and beyond. Since 2014, thousands have proudly posted results like a badge of honor on FetLife profiles. We use it as a roadmap, educational tool, and kink negotiation starter. It's even gone vanilla as the focus of social media challenges and pop magazine writeups. But is this kink subculture phenomenon all it's cracked up to be? While some find it helpful & validating, many say it's othering, stigmatizing, and normalizes red-flag behavior disguised as "kink." Midori & kinky therapist Joe Zarate-Sanderlin join us on ep 192 to deconstruct the BDSM test question by question + explore its wider impact. Why don't we scrutinize it the same way vet other educational sources? Who wrote this kink test, why, and what are they using the massive amount of data they're collecting about our deviant desires for? Turns out, it's a bit of a mystery… Midori Bio "Your Fairy God-Auntie of Kink. Exploding Expectations. Challenging Conventions." Trailblazing educator, sexologist, artist, and irritant to banality, Midori founded Rope Dojo and ForteFemme: Women's Dominance Intensive. She penned the first English instruction book on Shibari, "Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage" in 2001, paving the way for the popularity of rope. Dan Savage calls her the "Super Nova of Kink," while others affectionately call her Auntie Midori for her cool, tell-it-like-it-is, funny, reality-based teaching. She is also the author of "Wild Side Sex," "Master Han's Daughter," and "Silk Threads." Education, Coaching, Private Learning & Art: https://planetmidori.com. Special membership perks! Learn, laugh, and enjoy her special online classes, events, and art at www.patreon.com/PlanetMidori where she is working on her next shibari book! Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Bio "Joe Zarate-Sanderlin, an Assigned Male at Birth non-binary person (pronouns: they/them/theirs), came of age in the New York City kink scene in the late 1990s and early 2000s and they have connections in the Boston and San Francisco kink communities. They are a California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a private practice in San Francisco where they specialize in working with gender, sexuality, and relationship diversity. They teach several courses at Golden Gate University and were recognized as an Outstanding Adjunct Professor for 2022. They provide training and consultation regarding Talking to Clients about Sex, Gender in Psychotherapy, Open Relationships, BDSM Relationships, and other topics. In addition to private practice, their clinical experience includes being supervised by Dossie Easton for two and half years plus volunteering at a Catholic school for three years, a continuation high school for one year, and at a low-fee clinic for four years. They worked for the Burning Man Emergency Services Department for ten years, both in the Nevada desert and in the streets of San Francisco. In their spare time, they ski, coach and referee soccer, brew kombucha, dance to 80s music, and parent elementary-aged old twins." Episode 192 Links Midori Twitter https://twitter.com/PlanetMidori Midori Instagram https://www.instagram.com/planetmidori/ Midori Newsletter https://www.fhp-inc.com/newsletter Midori class/event calendar http://www.FHP-Inc.com/classes Midori's Patreon https://www.patreon.com/PlanetMidori/ Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Twitter https://twitter.com/jzsmft Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Website http://www.jzsmft.com/ Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Email: joe@jzsmft.com Joe Zarate-Sanderlin GGU Presents: Empathic Communication https://tinyurl.com/GGU-Empathy Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Gender Inclusive Language https://tinyurl.com/GGU-Gender Joe Zarate-Sanderlin Rebel Therapist: Express Yourself https://rebeltherapist.me/podcast/93 The BDSM Test http://BDSMTest.org @FocusedOnInfinity "Welcome to America" https://www.tiktok.com/@focusedoninfinity/video/7113012283181190442?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=6901962179530294789 @MargaretCho "Don't Be Scared" https://www.tiktok.com/@themargaretcho/video/7112909096608730410?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=6901962179530294789 TASHRA -THE ALTERNATIVE SEXUALITIES HEALTH RESEARCH ALLIANCE https://www.tashra.org/ CARAS - The Community-Academic Consortium for Research on Alternative Sexualities https://www.carasresearch.org/ Sexual Health Alliance Kink Informed Certification Program for Therapists & Care Professionals https://sexualhealthalliance.com/kink-informed-certification-program Romancing the Shadow: Challenging Limiting Beliefs Through Kink- Midori https://zippermagazine.com/challenginglimiting-beliefs-through-kink/ Additional Links ZipperMagazine.com https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Episode 192 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 15% off AND free shipping when you go to http://LikeAKitten.com/sunny OR enter code SUNNY at checkout Get up to 2 free months of podcasting service with Libsyn using this link https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=SUNNY or use code SUNNY Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 15% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

27 Kesä 20222h 14min

Kink & BDSM stigma is alive and well in the mainstream, in our own communities, and even in professional/academic spheres. In episode 191 of American Sex Podcast, Sunny Megatron busts some of the most common kink myths + provides clinical & academic resources for therapists, academics, and skeptical naysayers. She deconstructs the following kink & BDSM myths: Kink is always sexual and platonic kink does not exist Kink is considered abnormal by psychologists & the scientific community There's a dramatic difference between academic/clinical understanding of kink (that's always more accurate) and BDSM community education Dark age play aka sexual littles' play is abusive and reenacting pedophilia Kink practitioners engage in unhealthy self-harm by proxy and/or glorify abuse Kinks are caused by unresolved trauma … and more! Sunny Megatron Bio Sunny Megatron is an award-winning BDSM & Certified Sexuality Educator, Certified Relationship Coach, and media personality. She's the host and executive producer of the Showtime original television series, SEX with Sunny Megatron, plus co-hosts AASECT Award-winning American Sex Podcast and Open Deeply Podcast. Sunny was also named XBIZ Sexpert of the Year 2021 and is Editor-in-Chief of Zipper Magazine. Known for her one-of-a-kind build-your-own-adventure approach to sex, kink & relationships, Sunny coined the BDSM community catch-phrase, Kink is Customizable™. In her sell-out workshops, her unique brand of "edutainment" seamlessly combines her humorous lecturing style, interactive exercises, and the latest sexuality research. Sunny's passion is helping others overcome shame and find power through play and pleasure. Currently, she's working on her first book, "Customizable Kink: A Strategic Guide to Adult Play." Episode 191 Links Sunny Megatron website https://sunnymegatron.com/ Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron? Sunny Megatron Twitter https://twitter.com/sunnymegatron Sunny Megatron Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sunnymegatron/ ZipperMagazine.com https://zippermagazine.com/ Science of BDSM Research Team https://www.scienceofbdsm.com/ Tell Me What You Want Dr. Justin Lehmiller https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B0776PYDNM&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_WFW3MV22QFGNPEMR6T4F Sex and Psychology Podcast https://www.sexandpsychology.com/podcasts/ Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS) https://www.sexscience.org/ TASHRA -THE ALTERNATIVE SEXUALITIES HEALTH RESEARCH ALLIANCE https://www.tashra.org/ CARAS - The Community-Academic Consortium for Research on Alternative Sexualities https://www.carasresearch.org/ AASECT - The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists https://www.aasect.org/ Sexual Health Alliance Kink Informed Certification Program for Therapists & Care Professionals https://sexualhealthalliance.com/kink-informed-certification-program Why Good Sex Matters Book by Nan Wise, PhD https://www.amazon.com/dp/1328451305/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_x_tPnCFb0FAF4R5 Hurts So Good: The Science and Culture of Pain on Purpose, Leigh Cowart https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B08RYPSNVB&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_CG15B6Z43TYVFCDDPA3V Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul, by Stewart Brown, M.D. & Christopher Vaughan https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B001SCK720&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_VCMYS78KPC9ENVJTX9K7 The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment, Jack Morin Ph.D. https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B009YJYEKK&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_FMT1SPK6QAABA7EYYKGX Woodhull Sexual Freedom Foundation 2018 Research, Littles: Affects and Aesthetics in Sexual Age-Play ("Download" unlocks the free PDF) https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12119-018-09580-5 Why You Need BDSM's "Prime Directive" By Mollena Williams-Haas https://zippermagazine.com/why-you-need-bdsms-prime-directive/ Romancing the Shadow: Challenging Limiting Beliefs Through Kink- Midori https://zippermagazine.com/challenginglimiting-beliefs-through-kink/ Prior Related Episodes Therapeutic Kink With Andrea Glik – Ep 189 https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Therapeutic-Kink Attachment Styles With Aida Manduley – Ep 130 https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Attachement-Styles-Aida-Manduley/ The Science Of Sexual Fantasy With Dr. Justin Lehmiller – Ep 74 https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Justin-Lehmiller-Sexual-Fantasy-Podcast/ Kink Informed Therapists & Care Professionals W/ Midori – Ep 165 https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Kink-Certification-Midori/ Geek Therapy With Nicki Line – Ep 155 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Geek-Therapy/ Sex, Kink & Trauma W/ Jamila M. Dawson August Mclaughlin - Ep 173 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Sex-Bdsm-Trauma/ Decriminalizing BDSM W/NCSF, National Coalition For Sexual Freedom – Ep 185 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Explicit-Prior-Permission-Ncsf-Podcast/ Rethinking Kink With Kate Loree & Sunny Megatron – Ep 184 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Rethink-Kink-Podcast/ BDSM Community Real Talk w/ Sunny Megatron & Kate Loree – Ep 188 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Bdsm-Community-Influence/ Kink Education Freestyle w/ Sunny Megatron – Ep 172 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Bdsm-Education-Sunny-Megatron-Podcast/ Kink Education Freestyle Part 2 w/Sunny Megatron – Ep 180 Https://Sunnymegatron.Com/Kink-Education-Sunny-Megatron-Podcast/ Additional Links Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Episode 191 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 30-day free trial of Dipsea Stories when you use code SUNNY http://dipseastories.com/sunny 15% off AND free shipping when you go to http://LikeAKitten.com/sunnyOR enter code SUNNY at checkout Get up to 2 free months of podcasting service with Libsyn using this link https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=SUNNY or use code SUNNY Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 15% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

20 Kesä 20221h 34min

Many of us go through periods in our lives when we're not happy with the amount of sex we do or don't want. In Ep 190 of American Sex Podcast, Cyndi Darnell gives tips for changing our relationship to pleasure and navigating intimacy when one partner is perpetually 'not in the mood.' Some of the things we touch on: Mismatched Libido Responsive vs spontaneous desire Arousal vs libido vs desire vs attraction How gender & orientation factor in Reasons people have desire changes & discrepancy Common myths about desire & arousal that keep us stuck How to talk to partners & work together to find common ground Sunny also makes an exciting announcement about the new, kink-focused digital publication, Zipper Magazine! Cyndi Darnell Bio Cyndi Darnell (she/her) is a clinical and somatic sexologist and author of Sex When You Don't Feel Like It The Truth About Mismatched Libido & Rediscovering Desire (Rowman & Littlefield). Originally from Australia, she's now based in New York City where she runs a global consulting practice to clients worldwide. A psychotherapist by training, Cyndi currently supports individuals, couples and polycules navigating relationships and sexual difficulties, plus professional mentorship and case consultations to clinicians and sexologists worldwide seeking to deepen their understanding of the links between psychotherapy, sexology, relationships work and somatic practice. She's a Clinical Associate of Pink Therapy UK & Board Affiliate for University of Wisconsin STOUT Sex Therapy Certification program. Her podcast The Erotic Philosopher brings guests of diverse backgrounds together to explore issues affecting modern sex and relationships. Her numerous academic works are published in Journal of Sexual & Relationship Therapy and Journal of Sex Education among others. Her expert opinion is frequently sought by media outlets worldwide. Episode 190 Links Cyndi Darnell Website www.cyndidarnell.com Cyndi Darnell Twitter https://twitter.com/cyndi_darnell Cyndi Darnell TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@cyndi_darnell Cyndi Darnell Facebook https://www.facebook.com/cyndidarnellpage Sex When You Don't Feel Like It: The Truth about Mismatched Libido and Rediscovering Desire https://www.amazon.com/When-Dont-Feel-Like-Rediscovering/dp/1538161702 Zipper Magazine Launch 6/8/22 https://zippermagazine.com/ Zipper Magazine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/zippermagdotcom/ Zipper Magazine Twitter https://twitter.com/ZipperMagDotcom Zipper Magazine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292 Zipper Magazine Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxFDRtDhukxyQ_9t-Xfo2-w Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Episode 190 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 10% off your first month with BetterHelp http://betterhelp.com/asp 15% off AND free shipping when you go to http://LikeAKitten.com/sunny OR enter code SUNNY at checkout Bump'n https://getbumpn.com/ Hundreds of millions of people are unable to take pleasure into their own hands due to disability, ageing, arthritis or illness. Bump'n is on a mission to change this with the Bump'n Joystick - the world's first accessible sex toy! Help spread self-love and fund an orgasm today Get up to 2 free months of podcasting service with Libsyn using this link https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=SUNNY or use code SUNNY Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 15% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

6 Kesä 20221h 15min

Kink isn't a replacement for therapy, but it can be therapeutic. On Ep 189 Andrea Glik, LMSW explains the impact of trauma on our nervous system, depression as a survival response, the stress response cycle, the difference between glimmers and triggers, how BDSM can be used to heal trauma for both doms and subs, how she integrates clients BDSM experiences into therapy, plus how healing can manifest through CNC, little space, subspace, aftercare, and more. Even if you're not a kinkster, this episode will help you discover how trauma & shame affect your s3xual identity. Also a must-listen for mental health providers and those struggling to get their therapists to understand the importance of kink in their lives. Andrea Glik Bio Andrea Glik, LMSW is a psychotherapist, somatic healer, and sex educator. Andrea specializes in treating trauma and PTSD for women, survivors, and queer & trans folks, utilizing body-based and feminist therapy practices to help clients come home to themselves. Andrea practices on occupied Lenape territory (colonized as NYC) and can also be found on Instagram @somaticwitch. Episode 189 Links Andrea Glik Instagram https://www.instagram.com/somaticwitch/ Andrea Glik YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCVUm2ZAxWeu7DrcMRpP1JPw? Andrea Glik website https://www.andreaglik.com/ Healing through BDSM class & https://www.andreaglik.com/post/healing-through-bdsm Other workshops andreaglik.com/shop Inside Eyes Podcast, Healing Sexual Trauma with Psychedelics & Entheogens https://www.lauramaenorthrup.com/inside-eyes-podcast Burnout, The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Response Cycle by Emily Nagoski https://www.amazon.com/Burnout-Secret-Unlocking-Stress-Cycle/dp/198481706X Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma by Peter Levine https://www.amazon.com/Waking-Tiger-Healing-Peter-Levine/dp/155643233X Open Deeply Podcast http://opendeeplypodcast.com Sunny Megatron TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sunnymegatron Ken's charity DnD game Mondays 4pm-7pm PT https://www.twitch.tv/thunderpantsacademy American Sex Podcast Discord Community http://bit.ly/discordasp American Sex Podcast Patreon http://patreon.com/americansex Kink Academy Online BDSM Learning Library http://bit.ly/kinkacademy Sunny's Free Kink Negotiation & Scene Planning Mini-Workbook https://sunnymegatron.gumroad.com/l/negotiationwb Episode 189 Sponsor & Affiliate Discount Codes/Links *by using our links & codes you can help support our work while saving a few bucks too—win/win! 30-day free trial of Dipsea Stories when you use code SUNNY http://dipseastories.com/sunny 10% off your first month with BetterHelp http://betterhelp.com/asp 15% off AND free shipping when you go to http://LikeAKitten.com/sunny OR enter code SUNNY at checkout Get up to 2 free months of podcasting service with Libsyn using this link https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=SUNNY or use code SUNNY Hot & Healthy Erotic Humiliation recorded class https://gum.co/humiliationclass Prostate Play for Beginners (recorded class) from Sugar Baltimore https://www.sugartheshop.com/prostate-milking-for-beginners.html Sunny & Ken's classes on Kink Academy http://bit.ly/kinkacademyelectric & http://bit.ly/kinkacademyhumiliation 10% off American Sex Podcast & Sunny Megatron merch with code SUNNY (t-shirts, mugs, phone cases & more) http://bit.ly/sunnyshirts 15% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear) 15% off everything at Lelo.com with code SUNNY 10% off everything (with minor restrictions) online from woman-owned, feminist, trans & queer-friendly Early To Bed http://bit.ly/sunnyetb with code SUNNY 10% off everything from Fun Factory using this link http://bit.ly/sunnyfunfactory and the code SUNNY at checkout 15% off most items from Stockroom https://bit.ly/sunnystockroom15 with code SUNNY _______________________________________________________________ –Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to americansexpodcast@gmail.com –To support American Sex podcast, please visit http://patreon.com/americansex (plus you'll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!) –Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com –Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter Sunny & Ken, xo!

23 Touko 20221h 11min