336:  Having SECOND THOUGHTs about fiancé – Should I marry anyway? Is waiting until MARRIAGE a TRAP?

336: Having SECOND THOUGHTs about fiancé – Should I marry anyway? Is waiting until MARRIAGE a TRAP?

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. In today's show, we discuss staying a virgin until marriage, and what to consider when having second thoughts before marrying.

1. I am a 32 year old female, Catholic and I want to wait until marriage to have sex. Not 10 paid dates, but marriage. However, it seems that nowadays no one is willing to wait. All the religious men I know that are my age are already married or even they didn't wait. I don't know what to do. I am still a virgin even at my age and I don't want to give up my values just because men are used to living in an over sexualized world and want instant gratification. How do I approach this problem?

2. I'm a 45 year old female and about to get married for the first time but have second thoughts. A few years ago I met a man and he is now my fiance and we live together. He is very nice, smart, has a good personality, and is fairly attractive, but I never had intense passionate feelings for him. I never got those "butterflies" I would get whenever I had a crush. I should also note that I've never been in a relationship because I never felt ready and have always been busy with other things, and therefore wasted my 20s and 30s from a dating standpoint. My fiance and I get along very well, but a lot of the time it feels more like a comfortable friendship. I would love to have a passionate and meaningful relationship, but I feel that at my age, the good and attractive men have all been taken a long time ago. If I let him go, the older I get, the harder it will be to find someone. However, it also feels that by marrying him, I'm doing both of us a disservice. I also don't want to be single at this point in my life. Should I go ahead and marry him even if I'm not in love with him?

Intro 0:00

Evolution of politics 1:00

About 10 paid dates comment from last show 7:00

Question #1 about Staying Virgin until Marriage 12:58

Question #2 about having second thoughts in upcoming marriage 35:30

Wrapping up 57:45

Outro 58:31

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Doug Lisle, PhD www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

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378: All's Fair in Love, War, AI, and the Marketplace

378: All's Fair in Love, War, AI, and the Marketplace

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377: Dr. Lisle ESCAPES Dubai … to talk about Acceptance/Commitment therapy

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Q1: Dear Dr. Lisle,  I am curious what your thoughts are on Acceptance and Commitment therapy? I am a psychologist, and I have to use this method at my job, and I have noticed that some of the points ...

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376:  He wants the physical, She wants the emotional

376: He wants the physical, She wants the emotional

0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro 2:10 A little bit about Bitcoin 2:40 Q1: He wants sex, she wants connection 10:45 Females are defensive until they see love cues 22:25 Suspected key issue 29:15 Cou...

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375: Am I Still Hot? The OCD-Like Anxiety of Aging

375: Am I Still Hot? The OCD-Like Anxiety of Aging

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with co-host, Nathan Gershfeld. Dear Dr. Lisle, This question is about coming to terms with aging. I know that being "young" i...

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374: Gloat Therapy: What to Do with a Defiant Child

374: Gloat Therapy: What to Do with a Defiant Child

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373: I was in a Traumatic Relationship – How to Recover?

373: I was in a Traumatic Relationship – How to Recover?

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with co-host, Nathan Gershfeld. 0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro 02:07 The Year of Dr. Lisle's Book 3:13 New Personality Trait? T...

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372: Love, Lust, Lies & Lost Motivation

372: Love, Lust, Lies & Lost Motivation

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with co-host, Nathan Gershfeld. 0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro 01:45 Q1: Dating broke, unmotivated men in my 70's 13:40 Q2: Rep...

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371: Evo Psych Didn't Ruin Anything, You're Just Focused on the Scary Part

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0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro 02:42 Q1:  Listener struggles with finding meaning and motivation after embracing an evolutionary-psychology worldview that feels deterministic and uncomfortable. 7:03 Th...

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