55: The Parable of the Sexy Blood Baby (The Book of Ezekiel, Part One)
Apocrypals12 Tammi 2020

55: The Parable of the Sexy Blood Baby (The Book of Ezekiel, Part One)

Let me ask you a question, Theophiloi: why prophets so nasty? In this episode, we put our treasured No Cusses rule in the greatest danger as we dive into the violent and upsettingly horny visions of Ezekiel, last of the major prophets. This absolute scroll-eating mad lad has a whole list of unsavory activities and breads that he wants to tell you about in detail. Don't listen to this one with your mom.

Topics of discussion: The Greenlit Podcast Network, Aquaman: King of the Party Animals, physical descriptions of the Lord, Bible Arepas, the secret ingredient of Ezekiel Bread, Jaazaniah, Son of Shaphan, magic bands, beebos.

Hymnal: "Miserlou" by Dick Dale

Offertory: If you have been given riches, wealth, and honor so that you lack nothing of all you desire for yourself, let a stranger enjoy them via ko-fi.com/apocrypals.

Jaksot(126)

108: Skip This One (The Book of Hosea)

108: Skip This One (The Book of Hosea)

Look, Thephiloi, you don't actually have to skip this one (it's actually one of my personal favorites, tbqh) but I'm gonna warn you up front: we were in a PRETTY SILLY MOOD when we were recording this...

27 Marras 20221h 1min

107: Hellmensch (Stories of the Baal Shem Tov, vol. 2)

107: Hellmensch (Stories of the Baal Shem Tov, vol. 2)

You there, Theophiloi, what day is to-day? What? It's mid-November? Well, we keep the spirit of Halloween in our hearts year round on this podcast, so we're going ahead with our annual tradition of Ha...

13 Marras 20221h 12min

106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)

106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)

Welcome to Season 2 of Apocrypals, dear Theophiloi! You know, like how every podcast does 103 regular episodes and then takes an extremely planned break of several months before returning, refreshed a...

30 Loka 20221h 37min

105: Approximate Week V: RaVager

105: Approximate Week V: RaVager

No spoilers, Theophiloi. It's our birthday we're covering a text that listeners have been requesting for five years. Hymnal: "Teenage Dream" by Katy Perry, "The Winner Takes It All" by Stephen Mann o...

12 Elo 20221h 17min

104: Previously, On Bible (The Epistle to the Hebrews)

104: Previously, On Bible (The Epistle to the Hebrews)

And what more can I say, Theophiloi? By faith, we recorded a podcast about the Epistle to the Hebrews, which some dweeb thought was written by Mr. Paul even though it doesn't start with a lengthy intr...

1 Elo 20221h 4min

103: Sucky James (The History of Joseph the Carpenter)

103: Sucky James (The History of Joseph the Carpenter)

I suspect, dear Theophiloi, that there is no stepfather in all history more overshadowed than poor Joseph, the humble carpenter whose competition for his Son's affection was in fact the Almighty God. ...

3 Heinä 20221h 2min

102: Napalm Toots (The Lives of St. Martha of Bethany and St. Margaret of Antioch)

102: Napalm Toots (The Lives of St. Martha of Bethany and St. Margaret of Antioch)

The Book of Job is famously one of history's biggest bummers, Theophiloi, so in this episode, we're going with something that always brings us joy: women fighting dragons. It's Martha of Bethany and M...

13 Kesä 20221h 9min

101: The Apocrypals Solve Theodicy (The Book of Job)

101: The Apocrypals Solve Theodicy (The Book of Job)

Have you ever wondered why bad things happen to good people, Theophiloi? Well, we've found the answer in the Book of Job, a literary classic and/or utter failure, and it's pretty simple: God's indiffe...

21 Huhti 20221h 13min

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