86: God Junior (The Third Book of Enoch, Part 1)
Apocrypals4 Huhti 2021

86: God Junior (The Third Book of Enoch, Part 1)

Do me a favor, Theophiloi. Take a moment and write down the number of eyes, wings, and faces, that you think angels have, bearing in mind that you listen to this show and we know you know that two, two, and one are not the correct answers to that question. Now look at that number and understand that according to 3noch, you are almost certainly underestimating how wild we're going to get in this episode. It's our third Apocryphersary, and we're finally tackling the infamously brain-melting Third Enoch!

Topics of discussion: Calling Benito from Target, a very challenging church sign, Chris's ongoing attempts to become milkshake buddies with YouTube content creator Jacob Geller, a quick hit of our hatred for Bob Kane, a truly wild secret identity, God Robins, Negenoch, Parasangs, the grossest thing I've left in the show instead of cutting out, forgetting the Power Stone for a long minute, Watchamacallits, Saphiriel H Who Killeth, the different ways to interpret the phrase "full of eyes."

Hymnal: "Angeleyes" by ABBA, "Angeleyes" by Stephen Mann of English Martyrs Church

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17.

Jaksot(126)

108: Skip This One (The Book of Hosea)

108: Skip This One (The Book of Hosea)

Look, Thephiloi, you don't actually have to skip this one (it's actually one of my personal favorites, tbqh) but I'm gonna warn you up front: we were in a PRETTY SILLY MOOD when we were recording this...

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107: Hellmensch (Stories of the Baal Shem Tov, vol. 2)

107: Hellmensch (Stories of the Baal Shem Tov, vol. 2)

You there, Theophiloi, what day is to-day? What? It's mid-November? Well, we keep the spirit of Halloween in our hearts year round on this podcast, so we're going ahead with our annual tradition of Ha...

13 Marras 20221h 12min

106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)

106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)

Welcome to Season 2 of Apocrypals, dear Theophiloi! You know, like how every podcast does 103 regular episodes and then takes an extremely planned break of several months before returning, refreshed a...

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105: Approximate Week V: RaVager

105: Approximate Week V: RaVager

No spoilers, Theophiloi. It's our birthday we're covering a text that listeners have been requesting for five years. Hymnal: "Teenage Dream" by Katy Perry, "The Winner Takes It All" by Stephen Mann o...

12 Elo 20221h 17min

104: Previously, On Bible (The Epistle to the Hebrews)

104: Previously, On Bible (The Epistle to the Hebrews)

And what more can I say, Theophiloi? By faith, we recorded a podcast about the Epistle to the Hebrews, which some dweeb thought was written by Mr. Paul even though it doesn't start with a lengthy intr...

1 Elo 20221h 4min

103: Sucky James (The History of Joseph the Carpenter)

103: Sucky James (The History of Joseph the Carpenter)

I suspect, dear Theophiloi, that there is no stepfather in all history more overshadowed than poor Joseph, the humble carpenter whose competition for his Son's affection was in fact the Almighty God. ...

3 Heinä 20221h 2min

102: Napalm Toots (The Lives of St. Martha of Bethany and St. Margaret of Antioch)

102: Napalm Toots (The Lives of St. Martha of Bethany and St. Margaret of Antioch)

The Book of Job is famously one of history's biggest bummers, Theophiloi, so in this episode, we're going with something that always brings us joy: women fighting dragons. It's Martha of Bethany and M...

13 Kesä 20221h 9min

101: The Apocrypals Solve Theodicy (The Book of Job)

101: The Apocrypals Solve Theodicy (The Book of Job)

Have you ever wondered why bad things happen to good people, Theophiloi? Well, we've found the answer in the Book of Job, a literary classic and/or utter failure, and it's pretty simple: God's indiffe...

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