DO NOT SCRATCH YOUR EYES - BANNERS, BIN/KEEP, ALPHABET F##K!

Ahead of the Play Off Final, Justin, and Pete chat with Women’s team manager Damon Lathrope. We hear about hear his playing career cruelly cut short otherwise he might have met Watford in a notable cup match, his move into academy coaching and his introduction to the Womens game at the start of the season and his initial impressions. Damon talks about the exceptional playing, coaching and support staff and he explains his thoughts on the differences between the men and womens games. We go through the ups and downs of the season and Damon explains how the team have used the few moments of adversity in the season to respond positively and to build the courage and character of the team and the squad. We discuss fluctuations in squad personnel and Damon explains why the culture, atmosphere and success of the team has helped them even when success has sometimes worked against them (but in a good way). Helen Ward plays her last game in the Play Off final and Damon explains what she has done for the squad this season on and off the pitch this season. The rise and quality of Ipswich was clearly noted and of course played a massive part in the season and the last day. The embarrassment of riches in wide areas is discussed but whilst he enthuses about the assembled squad Damon stresses the parts of the squad that has allowed players to be so effective going forward as was evidenced in the penultimate game of the season coming back from a goal down to then leaders Oxford United. Pete makes Damon play one of his stupid word games (it’s not like Damon had more important things to do eh!?!) giving one-word comments for each of the squad. Finally, Damon expresses his appreciation and asks, if you can, get along to Stadium MK on Saturday! Coming tomorrow - we chat with Player of the Season Megan Chandler! This podcast is sponsored by Nord VPN  With any money we're going to make some posters to give away at the first game of next season to (hopefully) celebrate the Bunker being open again. COYH!!!! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

18 Touko 202331min

48 hours after our disappointing season concludes Pozzo &/or Manga waste no time in bringing in brining in a new head coach - former Barnsley and West Brom manager Valerien Ismael. We take a barometer check on initial fan reaction and here from some that it is a Pozzo appointment and others that it is a Manga appointment but either way everyone agrees that unless he's backed he will be out by October, December or the first international break!! One word summaries spell the please (not quite a haiku) of "Underwhelmed Apathy Bollocks Clusterfuck Meh Valium Asylum Bored Bewildered Anxious Ivic" - so there you have it! The 5 word and long form thoughts are more considered. Have a listen and see what you think. This is almost entirely unedited and raw. COYH!!!! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

10 Touko 20231h 19min

Part Two of the Post Match Phone in starts with Omar of You ‘Orns waxing lyrical on the women’s team and the lessons to be learned by the mens team, he then upsets Pete with a play off prediction that frightened us all!! 😊 Sean joins us and explains how hard it is for a new young fan to get a ticket in terms of fan ID arrangements and then explains the police presence outside of the ground may have more to do with Stoke City and might be unconnected to the extra stewarding that the club has seen fit to implement in the last few weeks. Paul joins to make a confession that he is giving up his season ticket but that by doing so a good season was guaranteed(ish) next term. Chorleywood Common resident John joined us from the 6th tee feeling sad because people near him in the ground were also not renewing after many years plus more instances of fan experience being very difficult and raising the idea of a fan advisory group. Jimmy Pesto with news that there will be another “little Pesto” landing soon and Gary confirms exactly how the word “Bastard” should be pronounced. Loads of excellent 5 word and long form reviews during which Uncle Ron gets Pete all misty eyed over “we are the champions” with Ron Pickering! Thank you as always to everyone who has contributed on this unadulterated nonsense – you are all the best! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

9 Touko 202356min

So, the season for the men finally comes to a close, as we all knew weeks ago, we weren’t going to make the play offs – except that the Women’s team has made the play off final for promotion. Wendover starts the ball rolling in terms of the apathy towards the season, an appreciation of going two up top and the need for some shithouses in the squad, Pete doesn’t know what day it is, Alan joins us in congratulating the women’s team and look forward to next season with some hope for better. Justin joins and is again grumpy this time about his handling by the stewards preventing him from watching the match with his friends in the family stand (he also confesses to be a bit of meanderer!!!), Pete covers a bit on Parlaci Gino and gets all misty eyed about the 70’s and 80’s when the club managed hooliganism in a mature manner. Paul comes on and tells that unlike Justin he was able to wander around Vicarage Road and that perhaps Justin’s haircut is too distinctive 😊 He also hopes that this is the same as the second season under the Pozzo and discusses what we need in the forthcoming transfer window. Finally, we’re joined by John (DNSYE Head of Dubai) who reminds us that he booked to come back for the Play Off final weekend and now that will be for the Womens final at Stadium MK!! COYH This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF       Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

8 Touko 202342min

Savour the atmosphere of a good day out in Billericay (words that have never been used before we suspect) as the Womens team battle the Essex side whilst we wait to hear how Ipswich and Oxford battle out - to say it is a happy ending is probably not a spoiler. We chat to legend, mural subject and purveyor of fine chocolate brownies Helen Ward at the end and look forward to a rematch against Forest in the battle for promotion on 20th May! Do excuse the distorted bits but Pete is an idiot! COYH!!!! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

7 Touko 202319min

Here is part two of the non-attending Stoke City Opposition View. Peter gives an update on Parlaci Gino (please go to our pinned tweet and fill in the questionnaire), the final NAIL-BITING predictions are handed in and then we listen to Carl struggle with AI as it gives him a lecture on making predictions on sporting events! COYH!!!! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

4 Touko 202335min

So Stoke City can't be bothered to turn but its no biggy!! It's all a dead rubber and we have other rubbish to talk about!! The Player of the Season gets short shrift, Javi Gracia being shown the door at Leeds United, Carls Xmas present, Roy Hodgson (AGAIN!!!), Justin reviews SEJ merchandise and Carl tries to work out how many tampons fit in a "clutch bag"! We go through the first 5 days of the "DNSYE End of Season Alphabet Nonsense" which has some of the worst intro music ever produced followed by season highlights before Justin makes us pick our favourite and least favourite Pozzo era season. Part Two coming soon!! COYH!!!! This Podcast has been created and uploaded by Do Not Scratch Your Eyes. The views in this Podcast are not necessarily the views of talkSPORT. Huge thanks to our Patreons: Chris Giannone, RichWFC2, Steve Holliman, Ian Ball, Paul Fiander Turner, Lee Anselmo, John Parslow, Mark von Herkomer, Neil Silverstein, Steve Brown, Dave Lavender, Skyla Rose, Kasey Brown, Nipper Harrison, Boyd Mayover, Colin Payne, Gary Wood, Karl Campion, Uncle Ron, Kevin Kremen, The Big Le – Bofski, Greg Theaker, Malcolm Williams, Jack Foster, Jason Rose, Michael Abrahams, Ian Bacon, Ken Green, Nick Nieuwland, Colin Smith Ant!!!!! & PDF Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

3 Touko 202345min