227 SelfWork: Good Stuffing. Bad Stuffing. What's the Difference?

227 SelfWork: Good Stuffing. Bad Stuffing. What's the Difference?

Compartmentalization (sometimes called stuffing away feelings) is a healthy skill much of the time. And you can tell when people don’t have that skill. Their emotions govern their lives and their choices. Something unpleasant or unwelcome ruins their day or causes them to have to leave their job or to yell at their kids. Or at you. So learning how to monitor and evaluate a situation – using mindfulness to be aware of something being emotionally difficult - and then being able to table those feeling until it’s the right time and place to work through those emotions can be a vital skill.

But compartmentalization can also be damaging when it's connected with a need to escape, for example, through addictions; when you use it to avoid what's termed cognitive dissonance, as when you're behaving in a certain way that doesn't match your true values; or when it's part of a sociopathic or even psychopathic personality disorder.

Our listener email is from a man whose ex is talking to their son in an inappropriate way – causing what he has read in my articles an “enmeshment” between the two of them. And he’s wondering what he can do.. What would you do?? So in this episode, sponsored by a new sponsor - Athletic Greens - we'll focus on the good and bad about compartmentalization.

Links:

Click this link to try Athletic Greens wonderful offer as a SelfWork Listener!

A testimonial about compartmentalization

Richard Castro's article about the dark side of compartmentalization

You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism or need for control which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions, long hidden away, that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

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520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

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519 SelfWork: Daring to Face the Fear of Public Speaking (And Other Anxieties)

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518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

Today we're talking with two experts on tuning into your own intuition. Sarah Gregg is a psychologist and a published author with over 90,000 copies of her books sold. And Jill Ritchie is a highly so...

2 Loka 38min

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

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25 Syys 22min

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

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18 Syys 24min

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

Today we'll focus on how to listen to someone so that they feel truly understood and seen. And it may not be a kind of listening that you know about. It's a method called "affect labeling" - meaning ...

11 Syys 35min

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

Today I'm focusing on three role models in my own life and the questions you can ask to help you identify your own. Dolly Parton. Maya Angelou. And a woman named "Snooky." Advertising Inquiries: ht...

4 Syys 23min

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

You may never have been on the inside of a psych ward. In his new book, JaKob Williams takes you there. Or at least, he takes you to his version of a residential psych ward. He's an interesting guy....

28 Elo 42min

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