231 SelfWork: How To Go From Languishing To Flourishing: What Positive Psychology Has To Say

231 SelfWork: How To Go From Languishing To Flourishing: What Positive Psychology Has To Say

Before we get started, I wanted you to know that Facing Depression, my new course all about depression - what causes it and what you can do about it - is available now, exclusively on Himalaya Learning. Himalaya Learning is an audio learning platform that provides an extensive library of courses straight to your ears from the world's greatest minds like Malcolm Gladwell, Tim Ferriss, Seth Godin, and more. To listen to this course and others like it, go to himalaya.com/depression and enter promo code OVERCOMING at checkout to get your first 14 days free. I hope to see you there!

Today’s episode, sponsored by BetterHelp, covers two topics – each one of them important to understand. The first topic is what positive psychologists (those that study what makes life worth living) call languishing – as its touted as the major emotion caused by the pandemic. What is languishing? It’s defined as a lack of well-being – or as one definition put it, an absence of a positive emotion about life. Researchers in the positive psychology camp say it’s different than actual depression and identify how you can go from languishing to flourishing or true happiness by stabilizing your life with these five pillars - focusing on positive emotions, being highly engaged, having quality relationships, identifying with something meaningful or broader than yourself, and feeling a sense of accomplishment.

The listener email is particularly poignant: it’s from a woman whose child died a decade ago. And her grief doesn’t seem to be remitting in any way. I’ll answer her using the words of other mothers who’ve lost their children.

Important Links:

BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

Article about Martin Seligman and the Five Pillars of Happiness

Article by Corey Keyes

NY Times article by organization psychologist Adam Grant on languishing

Six areas of psychological well-being

Episode 90 of SelfWork: Interview with Dr. Susan Averitt about grieving the death of a child

Best Online Grief Support Groups

HuffPost Article on Grieving the Death of a Child

You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism or need for control which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions, long hidden away, that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

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520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

Today’s episode of SelfWork was suggested by the last episode of Ted Lasso, in which Rebecca talked about grief and the messy feelings it can bring with it. Rebecca tells Ted, "We laugh, we hurt, we ...

16 Loka 21min

519 SelfWork: Daring to Face the Fear of Public Speaking (And Other Anxieties)

519 SelfWork: Daring to Face the Fear of Public Speaking (And Other Anxieties)

Dr. Margaret and her TEDx speech coach, Brian Miller, talk about challenging the fear of public speaking and the importance of human connection. "Go out and make a dent in the universe." These are th...

9 Loka 41min

518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

Today we're talking with two experts on tuning into your own intuition. Sarah Gregg is a psychologist and a published author with over 90,000 copies of her books sold. And Jill Ritchie is a highly so...

2 Loka 38min

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

There’s a word for intense fear of change. Metathesiophobia. That’s when your fear of change is so strong and affects your life so intensely that you’ve developed an actual phobia around change. If t...

25 Syys 22min

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

Having a panic disorder is bad enough. You may be able to anticipate it happening; for example, if you tend to panic when you see a spider or a snake. But other times, panic attacks – the sudden ons...

18 Syys 24min

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

Today we'll focus on how to listen to someone so that they feel truly understood and seen. And it may not be a kind of listening that you know about. It's a method called "affect labeling" - meaning ...

11 Syys 35min

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

Today I'm focusing on three role models in my own life and the questions you can ask to help you identify your own. Dolly Parton. Maya Angelou. And a woman named "Snooky." Advertising Inquiries: ht...

4 Syys 23min

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

You may never have been on the inside of a psych ward. In his new book, JaKob Williams takes you there. Or at least, he takes you to his version of a residential psych ward. He's an interesting guy....

28 Elo 42min

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