17: Enneagram Children Types 5-9

In this episode I talk about children and the enneagram types 5-9.

Each child has varying personalities just like adults do. I don't believe children's enneagram types set in fully until 4-5 depending on their nature and nature. Using these two episodes as guides I hope they help you identify your children's enneagram type to parent them the way they need to be parented.

5-Practical Child: They see the world in a logical way. They prefer to be alone and may hide themselves away. They might hide from overbearing parents, parents that don't show deep love or too many siblings. They will play by themselves for a long period of time. The might be computer wiz, book readers and collectors. They aren't in tune with their feelings and don't recognize they feelings of others. Think Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory. School they might love because of the challenge it brings but they struggle with the social aspects. They have a hard time being silly and vulnerable. All types have a wounded message but they wounded message might be that "fives can handle the emotional connection." Which might help you to understand why they behave the way they do. They might be spacey and aloof.

If you have a type 5 child allow them the space and freedom they desire. Do not force socialization on them. Make sure to take time to get to know their interests and passions.

6-Considerate Child: The cautious and considerate child learns to worry at an early age. You will notice the anxiety early on. Messages of what not to do stick with them and they see the world in an unsafe place. They will either trust adults or rebel against them. They stand back and watch others try things first. They lack confidence but will often question people when they are given compliments. They are loved by those around them. They are great followers, listeners and part of a group. They are constantly looking for advice from others. They can use their anxiety as humor. (Think Chandler Bing.) Change is hard for a six.

Having a six child. Make sure to give them a secure place. Make sure you are honest and upfront with them. Validate their worries.

8-Brave Child: They are bold and a force of nature. They learn the world is a dangerous place and only the strong survive. They are always worried about betrayal so they only trust a small group of people. They do not like to be controlled, they are not controlling. They have a tendency to get their way. Eights might be perceived as bullies but let's set this right. Eights are typically not bullies because they fear no one and bullies have a tendencies to act on their fears and insecurities. Eights are actually the one most likely to stand up for the underdog or help the weak. Going out of their way to take care of those around them that they care for. Eights have a strong sense of justice a common phrase is "that's just not fair." They will follow rules if it gives them more freedom. They are also more likely to trust themselves then adults. They might have a soft spot for animals and babies.

If you have and enneagram 8 child it is important for them understand they won't always get their way. Teaching them anger management tips for when they don't believe things are fair.

9-Thoughtful Child: They are very easy going and calm. Many have been in a home where they might be seen as not as important or having important opinions and are often middle children. They might sleep more than others types to avoid conflict. They might not be noticed as often because they have learned to just cope with not getting their way or voicing their opinions. Nines really struggle with staying on task. Nines are very easy to be with.

Continued on https://theenneagrammom.wixsite.com/enneagrammom/post/enneagram-children