The Heart3 Helmi 2015

Beauty Is Pain

It’s fun to try to be beautiful when people are giving you positive attention for it. It hurts if you’re not meeting that standard and people treat you like you aren’t even there. You watch the people who are getting a lot of positive attention for being that certain kind of beautiful and you are made to feel invisible. Or worse, people go out of their way to make you feel bad. It’s hard to be a woman, yes. It’s a lot harder to be a woman who’s hairier, wider, bigger, taller, square instead of round, straight up and down instead of curvy, big hands, big feet, no vagina and maybe no breasts either. A woman who isn’t quite looking like what some people think a woman should look like. But who is finding her way. To these women, the world can be downright cruel. More than cruel, violent. Harassment often escalates into assault, and more often than you would like to hear, escalates into full on homicide. For these women, being womanly in the way we are told we have to is sometimes about more than beauty. It’s about survival. This episode is about the story of one woman’s quest for beauty. It was a collaboration with badass poet and radio maker, Julia Alsop. After we finished production we invited Zil Goldstein into my walk-in closet magic sound booth to talk through some of the blind spots in the story. Zil is a nurse practitioner, working specifically to help medical providers be more LGBT aware. If you are interested in learning more about the disproportionate amount of violence that trans women face theNational Coalition Against Violence Project puts out a yearly report.

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Jaksot(105)

No: Inheritance

Episode Two: We catch up to Kaitlin while she is in her mid-twenties, waiting to fall in love. [Trigger Warning] Part of “No”, a mini season. Produced with the generous support of the IWMF.

23 Touko 201736min

No: Advance

Episode One: We meet young Kaitlin as she navigates her first sexual experiences and the confusions of girlhood. [Trigger Warning] Part of “No”, a mini-season. Produced with the generous support of ...

10 Touko 201719min

Trailer: No

Our new season, starting May 9th. Kaitlin explores her sexual boundaries from youth to adulthood.

28 Huhti 20173min

First Comes Marriage

Arranged marriages, although they sound scary to our Western ears, are considered extremely successful. Divorce rates are much lower. But those are statistics. What about being in love with the person...

4 Huhti 201723min

Pansy: Local Honey

Local Honey is a transfemme performance artist and musician living in New Orleans. Let her modulated voice and soft giggles croon you into her reality, where feminine sound is a weapon, a force, a cel...

20 Helmi 201717min

Pansy: The Beloved

Some say there are as many genders as there are people. And even more ways to creatively think about and claim them. In this story, Allen’s gender is complicated by a discovery he makes through medit...

7 Helmi 201721min

Pansy: Ultraslut

Blake’s crushing. Hard. On his new best friend and favorite person: Korry. They spend every day together. They sleep in the same bed together. They plan their futures together. But there are signs tha...

25 Tammi 201724min

Pansy: Twirl

Todd once loved a woman. And she loved him back, but there was one thing that she just couldn’t get over, he twirls. This piece explores what it means to be effeminate when you’re a straight cis-dude....

11 Tammi 201722min